They say that if you've worked retail, you can handle anything that comes your way. That's because it takes a lot of patience, maturity, and self-control to deal with the horrible customers that you're bound to encounter during your shift. From mall misfits to careless Karens, here are some of the worst customer service moments real people have experienced:
1. A Giggling Fit
It was getting near closing time and I was cleaning the self-checkout machines while my manager was topping up the coins and receipt paper. This woman, just shy of 50, came up to the checkout and just stood there with her mostly empty cart. I was waiting to see if she would walk up to the actual register for service, but no; she just stood there.
I finally asked her, "Do you need help?" She replied, "No," and kept standing there. Then, she started giggling loudly to herself in a way that made other people around her uncomfortable. I just kept cleaning and my manager continued filling the machines, all of which were devoid of customers. Finally, the woman spoke loudly, to no one in particular, saying the rudest thing ever: “Do you want to work or not?”
I let out a long breath, then dropped my cloth and spray bottle down. Suddenly, my manager stepped in and replied loudly, "She does have work! She's cleaning right now." Then she motioned for me to keep cleaning. Well, the woman giggled again, really loudly and snottily this time, and said, "I want a checkout." My manager replied, "You had your chance. She asked you if you wanted help. You said no. And now, you're going to have to check yourself out."
The lady started freaking out and demanded to see the manager. My manager destroyed her with one sentence: "You're looking at her." The woman sheepishly checked her own items out while we both watched her. And then my manager giggled loudly, just like the woman had done. It was glorious.
2. I Scream, You Scream
So, I used to work at an ice cream chain where we prepared the ice cream with various toppings on a frozen piece of rock. On this particular day, I was working with one other person and it wasn't too busy. Two young guys came in, about high school age. They ordered a large bowl of ice cream with a few toppings; I mixed it for them and went to ring them up.
Me: Okay, so that'll be this many dollars. Guy: Okay, I have a gift card. Me: Great! scans card so it looks like you owe another $0.36 after the gift card. At this point, they both look at each other and shrug sadly. Guy: Oh...I'm sorry, I don't have any money with me, never mind.... Me: Oh hey, it's cool, only $0.36 I take the $0.36 out of the tip jar and put it in the till no big deal!
Guy: Wow, thanks! The two guys leave, and I thought that was that. It just felt good doing something nice. But that wasn’t the end of the story. The one guy comes back several hours later. I saw him come in and went to the register to meet him. Me: Oh hey! You're back. Did you need anything el...Before I finished, and without looking at me once or saying a word, he dropped a $20 bill in the jar and immediately turned and left.
I was so shocked I just stared after him until he walked out the door. So that was pretty cool.
3. A Lucky Gamble
This just happened. A guy walked in and asked me, "What's the $8 lottery package that my wife always gets?" I looked at him, but I couldn't place him. In fact, he didn't look remotely familiar to me. He was not wearing his mask, mind you, but so far, I'd been pretty good at recognizing the people I've only ever seen with masks on since we bought the store.
However, I had no clue who this is. So I asked, "Sir, did you just ask me, a complete stranger, what your wife's preferences are?" He reiterated, "Well, she always gets an $8 package." I told him, "The lottery doesn't have an $8 package." Then, he asked, "Well, what are the standard games?" So, I rattled off all the games until we figured it out.
I handed him his purchase and said, "OK, here you go, sir, and may I highly encourage you not to tell your wife that you asked a complete stranger what her preferences were." I thought that would nip it in the bud, but he just wouldn't quit. He still seemed to think there was nothing amiss and replied, "Well, she's in here all the time." I still said, "But she's not here now, and I don't know who she is."
So, he clarified, "Well, I come in with her sometimes." To end the situation, I said, "OHHH! Well, I have a pretty bad memory so that must be it.” What was unsaid was, “It couldn't be that I see a few hundred people a day and you're all just faceless blobs in my memory if you don't come in here pretty much every day and actually have meaningful conversations!” Sheesh.
4. Great Minds Think Alike
I work in a small, locally-owned toy shop in a little college town. However, we have a lot of down-to-earth people and families. One day, this couple comes in with three kids and immediately the kids go crazy, wanting to show their parents every single toy in the store. It's a small store but is broken into three distinct sections, which are rooms connected by walkways.
We have a card rack next to the cash register that has all sorts of cards. As the wife is being dragged by her kids around the store, the husband comes up to me and quietly goes "Don't let my wife see, we are big Star Wars fans" and slides me a Star Wars card and cash to pay for it. I quietly make small talk with him about the weather and ring him up.
I finish just in time as his wife and kids walk around the corner and then grab their dad to go beg and ask for toys. I'm chatting with the mom, and she sees a card on the card rack and says "This would be perfect for my husband but don't let him see this." She slides me cash, finishes the transaction, and winks. It's the exact same card.
They finish their shopping, purchase a few toys for their three kids and walk out, both chuckling to themselves about how clever they are.
5. Three Strikes
Some years ago, I worked an extra part-time job in the evenings at a small national retail chain in the U.S. that specializes in woodworking tools, supplies and machinery. The vast majority of our customers were great, but every so often we would get one that was a real peach. On the night in question, it was 15 or 20 minutes before closing.
I was at the front counter where the registers are, doing busy work to fill the time before I locked the doors. The sales floor was completely empty, except for me. I heard the doors open and looked up to see a customer walking in. "Hi! Welcome to our store!" I said to him in a genuinely friendly tone. Fish-eyed, he turned his head to glance at me.
He made momentary eye contact before walking past without saying a word. Strike one. A few minutes later, I saw him walking up to the counter, so I asked, "Hey there! Did you find what you were looking for?" Again, without a saying a word, he tossed a few packs of euro hinges on the counter. Strike two. Then, I asked, "OK! Have you shopped with us before?"
I needed to know as it was part of my job to enter our customers' information in our computer system if they'll let us, and if they're in our system, then we ring them up under their account. Rather than answer me, he tossed a postcard-sized piece of paper onto the counter. Strike three. Ding! Ding! Ding!
Now, if someone's in our system, and they give us the month of their birthday, we send them a birthday coupon every year, good for 10% off of everything in a single purchase. There are a few exclusions and conditions clearly printed on the coupon. I picked up the piece of paper he'd thrown in front of me, and it was indeed his birthday coupon.
I used the information on it to pull up his account, noted a key piece of information on the account, and gleefully told him, "OK, sir. I see your birthday isn't until next month, and unfortunately, the birthday coupon is only good for a single purchase during the month of your birth." As I said this, I was holding the coupon up and pointing to the text I was referring to.
I am 90% certain I had my best customer service smile on my face at that point. After standing there and staring at me for a few seconds, he let out a snort of what I presume was disgust, then he turned on his heel, and started heading for the door. "Wait!" I called after him. "You forgot your birthday coupon!" Without stopping or turning, he made a dismissive wave of his hand, went through the door, and disappeared into the night.
Adios and good riddance. At this store, our manager was a super-cool guy who encouraged us to bend over backward to help customers, which I gladly did. Customers came in all the time trying to use their birthday coupons early, and it was never a problem. We'd happily give them the discount anyway, with a friendly reminder that it was supposed to be used during their birth month.
But hey, Ihe wanted to act like that. He couldn't be bothered to show me even common courtesy, nor would he speak even one word to me. That was his choice.
6. Technical Difficulties
I work in retail in an electronics store. This tale takes place today and yesterday. So, a customer comes up to me looking for a new laptop. I show him around a few of the laptops and he states he needs something portable but powerful. Of course, these two things usually mean a 13-inch laptop with an i5 or i7. Me: So what do you need it for?
Customer: "Well, the laptop has to be powerful but I need it to be lightweight as I'm an international student." Me: "Right okay, well here's a few laptops we have that fit this description.” A note about these laptops: They're usually around $600-$1000 depending on the brand and specifications. Now, I notice the customer is carrying a laptop in a carrier bag.
I ask him about that one, just being a bit nosy but also making conversation as I show him around the laptops. Me: "So, what's wrong with that laptop?" His response made me stop in my tracks. Customer: "Oh. the battery has blown up and doesn't power on anymore.” See, that’s kind of weird and doesn’t really describe a specific thing.
Me: "Right okay, can I have a look?" So he takes it out of the bag and I notice it's a MacBook Air. Being the store’s Apple person I ask if I can take it. Then I notice that it has another computer shop’s sticker on the top of it, so I ask about that. Me: "I see you've taken it to the other computer store down the road, what did they say is wrong with it?"
Customer: "They didn't open it up, but they said it would be $400 for the problem I told them I thought it was." Me: (internally) "They've quoted this and haven't even had a look at it. No surprises there." So I took the Mac from the customer and walked him down to the Apple counter of our small store. I plug it into our Mac charger and notice the charger lighting up green but not switching to amber, which it should do.
So just out of habit, I perform a hard reset on the MacBook…and it turns on. Customer: " Oh my gosh, you've got it working." Me: "Yeah, I just want to run some diagnostics to make sure this isn't a fluke." I got the customer to change the language from his native to English and go to diagnostics. The tests came back fine and the battery reported fine.
Me: "It's in good working order with no problems, it just needed this reset.” Then I say, “However, your charger is toast so you'll need a new one of those." Customer: "That's amazing. Thank you so much, my dissertation was on there and I would have to start it again." I’ve actually just completed my dissertation so completely understand the situation and the stresses of university life. Customer: "How much will it be for the fix?"
Me: "Nothing, it was a fast two-minute fix, no need to worry." To this, the customer becomes all thankful and happy and tells me he wants to pay for dinner and I insist it's okay and just part of my job. So he's on his way with his Mac in working order and a warning not to use the charger and use an extra form of storage to back-up his work. But he still had something up his sleeve.
Today, he came back in to purchase the new charger and was looking specifically for me in the store. He had gone out and bought me a cake and macarons from a high-end cake shop. At first, I said I couldn't accept, but after much insistence, I did accept and the customer left happy. I left work later in the evening with a cake in tow and a smile on my face.
Not all customers are difficult and it left me with so much joy at the end of the workday.
7. A Watery Chuckle
I work in a large airport at a small convenience store on one of the busiest concourses. I hear it all, especially about our prices. Although we try to keep our margins as low as possible, we still have to pay our rent as a business, and it's about $14k a month. One day, I had an older woman come in and set down an expensive brand of water that was priced around $5.15 after tax.
I knew that she was going to say something about it, so I prepared myself mentally. Indeed, she did say something, and it threw me for a loop. She asked me, “Wanna know something funny?” I said that I did. She said, “This same water in another airport is $2.50.” I stared blankly at her for a solid 10 seconds. Finally, I said, “I think I missed the joke.”
She then proceeded to insult me, but she still purchased the water before leaving in a huff. Best day I've had in a while.
8. Paper Trail
A lady came into my work to sell something using her passport as an ID. Something didn't look right. I stared at it a bit before noticing that the expiration date was in a slightly different font than the other dates on the passport. I held it up to the light and saw a rectangular outline around the date. I ran my thumbnail over it, and the edges of a sticker came up off the passport.
Underneath the sticker, the date had been scratched out. I pulled the sticker the rest of the way off before handing her passport back and explaining that we couldn't accept any altered/damaged/expired ID. I guess all that time playing "Papers, Please" finally paid off.
9. A Customized Experience
A customer showed me a ring and asked me about it. I told her that it was a sterling silver lotus ring. The customer then proceeded to show me that it did not fit her. As she wedged it halfway down her finger, she said, “But it does not fit me, see?” Did I look like a jeweler who could resize rings on the spot? No. So I explained to her that we had only one piece of that design left.
A while later, the same lady asked if the artist was local. I said that I wasn't certain that she was from the city, but that all the artists represented in the shop were American. That meant that if she wasn't from our state, then she was from another state. Then the lady said, "Well, duh. If she's not from here then she's from somewhere else." Sigh.
I wanted to eye roll since that was my standard response whenever someone asked about local artists, and I had never gotten such a sour reply before. Most people just wanted to confirm that the thing was at least made in America if not locally. And then she asked me which way her husband had left, so I just pointed to the only exit and said, "That's the only way out."
10. Every Little Bit Helps
So I work at a pet store, and my family owns it. We do boarding, daycare, training, grooming, and retail. I had a regular come in a few months back, and he wasn't doing too well financially since becoming disabled. He brought in his dog for grooming and I noticed the dog had a large number of fleas, I called and informed him.
I let him know that I would also give his other dog a flea bath for cheap so he could take care of it. Once he got there, he tried to pay with a care credit card that the state had given him. Unfortunately, we don't take that card. So he gave me his card information so I could charge him when he got paid. I sent him home with some flea and tick topical that we sell over the counter.
Well, the day came for me to run his card, and he called me to remind me. I thanked him, got off the phone, and didn't charge him. Today he called realizing he hadn't been charged, and I told him I didn't plan on charging him and was happy to be able to help. He couldn't talk for a bit, trying to compose himself. I got off the phone knowing I had made someone's day better.
I know how hard it can be living on disability, since my mom is on it. Sometimes even the littlest of things can help.
11. They Are All This Together
I work for a grocery store that only sells all-natural foods. That means no artificial preservatives, sweeteners, flavors, and such, as well as any items with certain ingredients like high-fructose corn syrup. We have an internal list of ingredients that products cannot contain and even have had to cease carrying some top-selling products after reformulation introduces one or more of them.
Being the type of store that we are, we get people from all over the political spectrum and quite a few on the extreme fringes. This is about a guy who came to our store multiple times. I will refer to him as Mr. Q since I do not even know his name. Mr. Q was a semi-regular customer since before my employment. My first experience with him was indirect.
I was overseeing the front-end and placing some orders with vendors. He went through the line of one of my cashiers, Melissa. Unfortunately for her, Melissa did not have anyone else in her line, so the guy stood there yakking her ear off. Then I heard that chilling phrase. I do not recall what the full sentence was, but he said the magic words: "QAnon."
This immediately made my ears perk up. He could have been someone more on the left, making fun of the QAnon thing or he could be a believer. Once I knew that he was spouting off right-wing conspiracy theories, I told one of the other managers that I was going to go rescue Melissa who was just smiling and nodding.
This involved getting myself to a phone out of sight and then paging the staff member to the loading dock so they could hide for a few minutes. This particular incident happened pre-pandemic, so the store's general manager was still there. As I used the phone right outside his office, I got an odd look from him, until I told him, "Crazy at her lane." He does not suffer fools, so he just chuckled.
This visit was done with. Then, after the pandemic started, my store adopted the policy of "masks must be worn, but if you claim a 'condition,' then you don't have to wear one." This annoyed us because we had so many liars. Mr. Q, of course, was one of those. He was relatively quiet until he checked out. At the exit door, he stopped and turned around.
Then, he started loudly proclaiming how the whole pandemic was a hoax because otherwise "people would be dropped like flies in the streets!" We just rolled our eyes at him and he left quietly, thus, ending that visit. Then came the third and final visit. This happened after our store had decided to go to a "mask-mandatory" policy without the medical exemption.
We got battle-hardened by this since we had to fend off people screaming about how it was against the law and how they were going to sue us, etc. That's when Mr. Q came in, and things started to get interesting. One of the other managers, Aaron, spotted him but he was occupied with a customer, so he alerted me. He also said, "That guy is a fool, so good luck."
Our strategy for dealing with people without masks was to just grab the box of the complimentary ones we offered, approach the person, and ask them if they needed a mask. Most of the time, by then, it was people who simply forgot to put one on...but that wasn't the case with Mr. Q. Our conversation went like this:
I asked him, “Hi! Did you need a mask today?” He simply replied, “I have a medical condition.” I clarified, “Sorry, but we still need you to wear a mask to be inside the store. We do offer curbside shopping though. But, since you have a list, we would be more than happy to shop for you and then take payment and bring the bags out to your car.”
He, of course, became annoyed and said, “Are you aware of the United States Constitution? Do you know you are violating my rights?” I stood my ground and said, “Sorry, sir, but this is private property and we do require a mask.” By this time, Aaron had finished with his customer, so he came over to back me up and said, “Yes. We are not a government entity.”
That's when Mr. Q did the unthinkable—he proceeded to dramatically say that he felt sick, then he fake coughed on Aaron and me. So, of course, All semblance of "customer service" and "courtesy" went out the window at that point, and Aaron said, “You need to leave now. You are no longer welcome here.” Mr. Q took that as an invitation to go on a random rant about his rights.
So, Aaron told me to call the authorities. Mr. Q then went on another tangent and said, “You guys are poisoning people with the products you sell! What do you have to say for yourselves! I know my rights!” In the meantime, I went over to the phone and started dialing. By that point, we had called them so many times that we knew half the department by name.
Now, Mr. Q realized what I was doing, so he wisely abandoned his cart and left the store. Aaron pulled out his phone, started filming, and followed the guy out. Mr. Q then spent the next five minutes pacing our parking lot, screaming at Aaron. It was truly unhinged. His rants alternated between us poisoning people and targeting Michelle Obama.
Aaron repeated to Mr. Q that he needed to leave and that he was now banned from the store. Then, when he saw Aaron was filming him, he started yelling about how Aaron must be like Michelle Obama too. Thankfully, he just kept pacing. I joined Aaron outside after calling the authorities and getting one of the back-end managers to come up front to watch over the cashiers.
Unfortunately, he left before the authorities arrived. And since he did not buy anything, we did not have his full name to give to them. After showing the general manager the video, we got the verdict that Mr. Q was banned from thereon. That means that the next time he shows up, we call the cops immediately and then tell the guy he is banned, in front of them.
This would allow them to arrest him on subsequent visits. He wisely has not shown up since then.
12. Nickel And Diming
Our store was liquidating to shut down and we were in our final days. We were no longer giving refunds on goods that customers had simply changed their mind on. It was incredibly stressful and customers were being outright rude despite the fact that everyone they were dealing with was being made redundant in a matter of days.
One day, a guy came in and asked if we could refund a suitcase he bought and changed his mind on. He swapped it for a few other things, but he was still short by about ten dollars or so. I prepared myself for today's shakedown and told him I was very sorry he couldn't have any money back, but we were still exchanging if he wanted something to go toward the value.
He started pilling sweets, biscuits, cakes, etc. onto the counter and asking if they added up to the difference. Eventually, we were still about 10 cents short. I told him we weren't quite there but we didn't have anything for 10 cents, so it was the best I could do. His response? "Well, I think you'll have trouble enough eating all of that! Cheerio!"
And off he went, leaving me with a giant pile of free food. Closing the store was an incredibly stressful time, but I'll always remember that friendly dude.
13. A Red Flag
We have one of those self-serve lottery machines. Do you play numbers? Mega Millions? Scratch-Offs? You can do it all here at this machine. Except this one grown woman who, I swear, was deliberately just not listening despite saying repeatedly that she did not know what she was doing. I still persevered and tried to explain the process to her.
I said, "OK, so right in the middle of the screen are three big blue boxes. Touch the middle one." The lady touched the Powerball button, which was on the far left, on a row of four boxes. I tried to correct her by saying, "No—that's Powerball. You need to hit the red rectangle at the top right of that window where it says ‘Close’ to close this."
She proceeded to touch the little tiny red button by the quantity bar. I repeated that she had to touch the box with the word 'Close' in it, but she was not listening. Of course, stared intently at the bottom of the screen where there was literally no red at all. This back and forth went on for a good twenty minutes. Somebody just end my misery for me.
14. Mother Tongue
I work at a BBQ shop here in Australia. I've dealt with all kinds of customers in my three years of experience, and then today I had the most memorable experience yet. I had two Chinese men walk in and they looked to be in their early 20s or so. They walked around for a bit before I approached them and asked if they needed any help.
It suddenly became clear that they didn't know a word of English when one pulled out his phone and started using a translator. I soon fleshed out that they were looking at a BBQ we have in stock and some accessories, and after about 25 minutes of going back and forth with the translator, they had everything they wanted.
Normally this transaction only takes about 5-10 minutes on average, but I didn't mind as we were all being patient with each other. I rang up all the items and showed them a full breakdown of the items, which totaled around $500. I had all the products ready to go in a pile next to the register when he finished paying. Then he did something that made my jaw drop.
When it all finalized, he leaned in to shake my hand and said in perfect English: "Oh, just so you know, we speak perfect English mate." Both these men erupt into laughter while I'm sitting shaking my head and laughing, as well as thinking how the heck did I fall for it. After we all slowly regained ourselves, one of the men leaned in and said how well I took it. It totally made my week.
15. Sunshine On A Rainy Day
This sweet old man made my day! His name is Samuel, and I’m not sure of any medical issues he has, but every time he comes in, he’s sweating buckets and his hands shake pretty bad. The first time that he came in while I was working, we just started talking since he always gets food to go for him and his mom.
He asked me if I had any pets and I told him that my childhood dog Max had passed about a week ago prior, so I just have a cat. He proceeded to tell me the nicest thing a customer has ever said: that my dog was waiting in heaven for me, and that he made it over the rainbow bridge. I cried like a baby after he left.
The third time that he came in, he asked me what college I went to, and how I was amazing for working and going to school full time. I was failing a class at the time and having someone who didn’t know me tell me that I was doing amazing just warmed my heart. When he came in for the fourth time, we continued our discussion.
I told him that I only had a couple of classes left at my community college and that I would be able to start my bachelor's in business. He did not hesitate to gasp and tells me how proud he was of me, and how I will go on to do great things. He then told me that God had blessed me because my hair was so pretty, even though at the time it was unwashed and in a not-so-cute messy bun.
I think that dude is my retail guardian angel. He always shows up when I’m having a rough time, and he makes the day brighter and better.
16. He’s A Charmer
I was working the drive-thru, and this man pulls up to the second window for me to give him his food. He has the cutest little baby boy in the back seat, so of course, after the greetings and handing off the food, I said hi to the baby. He had been staring intently at me and when I said hi, he immediately starts laughing and waving.
He was just the cutest thing! His dad turned around and looked at him and said, "Son, you're too young to be flirting. Stop it." Me: D'aww, honey, I'm sorry, but I have a boyfriend. If you were like 15 years older, you could fight him for me, but right now I think he'd crush you. And so we shared a laugh, he left, and I continued on with my work.
About an hour later, they return! The dad: Oh, he insisted on coming back to see you! turns around and says to his son now remember, no more flirting because she has a boyfriend. The baby just laughed and waved his chubby little arms around. It was a good day.
17. A Ban Challenge
Today, a guy bought something at my checkout. After paying, he went, "Actually, I am banned here. What do we do now?" I stared at him for a solid second, my brain probably making the Windows XP shutdown sound. I was shocked by his audacity, to not only come again after being banned but also telling me about it, after buying something.
I asked my supervisor, who sighed, saying that he got lucky in that case and that I should tell him to take his things and leave. But that wasn't enough for him. He started provoking me, saying, "And what about the next time, huh?" I explained that I wasn't authorized to decide about the duration of his ban and that, in case of doubt, he just shouldn't come again.
He still went on, now outright harassing me, "Yeah, what do you want to do? Do you want to call the authorities? Huh? Huh?" At this point, I was about to cry, because he just kept harassing me and I didn't know what else to tell him. Then a lady in line stood up for me, telling him to leave me alone because he was making me nervous.
"Yeah, I can see you're shaking. I wonder why," he blurted out. I was, in fact, shaking because it took all my strength not to cry in front of everyone. After telling the lady to mind her business and being rude to her too for a bit, he finally left. My heart goes out to the lady, who was third in line, and told me, "Honey, don't ever let a man talk you down like that! Always remember: Big ego equals small elsewhere!" That really lifted my spirits!
18. The Game’s Fixed
This happened a few years ago when I worked in a bead shop. We did jewelry repair too. Mostly simple stuff like reattaching clasps, restringing beads, or pearl knotting. Occasionally, when we weren't busy we would do repairs on the spot. Our minimum charge for any repair was $4 plus the cost of the materials. So one day, a lady comes in and she needs this necklace repaired ASAP because she wants to wear it that night at a dinner party.
I saw that the necklace just needed the clasp reattached, which is something I can do in under a minute. I told her the store policy and said I could fix it for her while she waited. She seemed cool with that, so I grabbed a jump ring and reattached the clasp for her. I rang her up and she took her necklace, leaving without a word.
The next day, we got a call from the lady asking to talk to "the manager." She told the bead shop owner she was upset about having to pay $4 for the jewelry repair because I fixed it in under a minute. Her words, "Last time I checked, only doctors made $4 a minute." It's something you didn't know how to do lady. I did it quickly because I've done it five hundred and sixty-two million times.
If you didn't want it fixed professionally, then do it yourself.
Flickr
19. Like Money In Your Pocket
I used to work for Kohls. While there, I had one customer come to the service desk with her receipt, saying that the cashier did not take off her 30% coupon. Usually, this is an easy enough fix, but when I looked at her receipt, the total was $0.00. She had already used Kohl's cash to cover the whole thing. I told her the computer system takes the dollar off coupons first.
It is only afterward that it will then take the percentage off. This is how it works, irrespective of the order in which you scan them. Since her Kohl's cash took care of the total, I told her that the system couldn't take 30% off of $0.00. Apparently, she didn't like that...not one bit. She then started yelling at me and telling me that I was stealing money from her.
I explained to her that Kohl's cash is just a coupon we give to customers and not actual money. She then told me that she wouldn't be shopping at Kohl's again, and she threw her 30% coupon at me before leaving.
20. Ring Around The Rosy
So this story begins in a locally-owned jewelry store. The jeweler has been repairing and selling high-end jewelry for 52 years. He is over 70 and still works like a madman. His business is efficient, reasonably priced, and high quality, allowing him to stay in business as long as he has. For repairs, the customer must leave their piece of jewelry with us for several weeks to place it in line.
When the jeweler is ready to do the repair, we call the customer with a price quote, and if they approve, the repair is completed within 24 hours. If they decline the quote, the repair is marked as "did not repair" in our computer system, filed in the "completed repairs" bin, and the customer can pick up the “failed” repair at no charge.
Now, when the customer leaves a piece of jewelry with us, we give them a claims ticket that says "Not responsible for pieces left over 60 days from completion of the repair." We also take down their name, address, and phone number (multiple if possible) to ensure that we contact the correct person when the repair is complete.
Enter customer. The year is 2014. The month is February. She leaves her ring with us to be repaired. When the jeweler looks at it several weeks later, he finds that the original ring is too fragile and cannot be repaired. We call the customer, and she says she will come get it. Now, obviously, jewelry is something you don't just THROW OUT after 60 days.
The warning on the ticket is just to encourage customers to pick their items up as quickly as possible so that our safe isn't full of jewelry all the time. We also keep a clear record of phone calls to and from the customer including the date and time as well as whether we reached the customer or left a voicemail. Fast forward. The date is now January 2016.
We are doing a bi-annual "call everyone who still has jewelry here." I notice that this repair has been here a LONG time, and we have called her more than six times. I give her a ring and the number is disconnected. We decide that after two years, this woman may be gone or ill and no one knew to come to pick up the piece.
It was a piece of junk anyway, and on top of that it was broken beyond repair, so we got rid of it. The date is now April 2017. Enter a woman to the jewelry store. She says she is here to pick up a repair, but when I look it up in the system, it says it was picked up in January 2016. Now obviously, this woman is furious that someone else could have picked up her repair, so we dig through our paper receipts from over a year ago and find our note that the repair was discarded.
We explained to the woman that the repair had been disposed of and our reasoning for doing so. We apologized, but there wasn't anything to do. My favorite part is when she says, “But why didn't you call me?!?!” Me: “Ma'am we did call you. We spoke with you several times as I see here in our notes, and you kept saying you would come to pick it up.”
“But after two years,” I continued, “your number was disconnected and you did not leave another method of contact. If you look at our ticket, you will see that there is a warning that we are not responsible past 60 days. We did you the favor of keeping your item for two years, but there is nothing else I can do for you.”
Honestly, I'm not sure what she even wanted with that item anyway.
21. Listening In
I have been working throughout COVID in a supermarket. A few months ago, I found out that I have permanent hearing damage and hearing loss from an illness I had from January to February. I am currently in the early stages of an audiology referral and my employer has been really helpful. They are making sure that I can still work in the same roles as before with the same level of confidence.
One day, a customer arrived at the till who, for some reason, misinterpreted one of the offers that we run. Essentially, she wanted the discount but did not want one of the items required for the discount to go through. She did not realize that I have to scan everything and, therefore, charge her for the extra item in question so that she could get the discount.
I processed the transaction in this way but not without her raising her voice and attempting to grab the item that she didn't want out of my hands. At that point, I was quite confused. I could hear parts of this customer's sentences, but she was speaking very quickly and I did not understand why she was getting so incredibly agitated over some frozen peas. Around this time, she also started to badmouth all of my colleagues and myself, saying that we "shouldn't work here if we don't know what offers are on in the store."
She also said that the staff members "know nothing," implying that I was the one who should lose my job because of her adamant misreading of an offer. Through this, I finally understood why exactly she was so angry. So, I asked one of my colleagues to come to the tills in order to assist the customer.
She did not want to engage with me, nor was she capable of having a civilized conversation at that point. My colleague arrived and I began to serve the other customers waiting while the woman went on to my colleague about how I was "incompetent" and "useless." But that's not the worst thing she said—she repeatedly stated that I "wasn't listening" to her, even though I had given her my full attention.
The repeated emphasis this woman put on me not "listening" really hit a nerve. The last thing that I wanted after going through the wringer with various illnesses for the past seven months was to be told that I was losing my hearing. It was permanent, and it was not something that could be fixed in the same way as the previous illnesses.
I have to work a lot harder on the tills due to the aforementioned hearing loss and as much as I try to not care and ignore it, this was just too much for me to handle at the moment. I started to cry in the middle of a transaction while this woman thoroughly berated me for something that I had absolutely no control over.
Somehow, I managed to pass it off as hay fever which I don't think anyone believed. Eventually, it clicked into place for the customer that she was incorrect, and she very quickly went on her way after realizing that she had just completely humiliated herself in a store full of people. There was no apology made to any of my colleagues, or to myself and the other customers in the store.
I had been debating whether or not I needed to get a lanyard clearly stating I have a hearing loss, but it is still very early into the investigation process and I didn't want to buy one before I had any thorough tests done on my ears. But this was the event that cemented that I absolutely needed to get one as soon as possible.
Regardless of my hearing loss, that kind of behavior is absolutely unacceptable and a completely different kind of demeaning. It was the most insulting reaction I have ever seen, and over a bag of frozen peas, no less. If she didn't want them, we had a perfectly acceptable food bank to which they could be donated.
22. You Can’t Buy Happiness
Here in England, we have 50p coins, and some of them are decorated to celebrate someone, an event, or a landmark. These can be quite collectible. Last year, a series of five coins were released to celebrate the author Beatrix Potter, and certainly, the older generations liked to keep them. By far the most sought-after coin featured a character called Peter Rabbit.
It wasn't uncommon for people to ask me to try and find one in my till for them where I worked. Fast forward to today. The coins are rarer than they used to be, but they are also sought after by fewer people. A lady comes up to my till, buys a few things with a total of £3.50, and pays with exact change, one of the coins being a 50p.
Naturally, I glance at it and remarked it was one of the Beatrix 50ps. Me: "That's one of those Potter 50ps, haven't seen one in a while." Woman: "Oh sorry, can I take that back? I've got four of them and I want to give all five to my granddaughter." So I give it back to her, and she can only give me a £1 coin. She now needs 50p change.
Woman: "Sorry about that love, I've been trying to track down these coins for months and I just got this one from across the road there!" Me: "Oh really? Which ones have you got so far then?" Woman: "I've got the duck, squirrel, the hedgehog, and the seal." At this point, I notice the line is growing, so I start fumbling around for a 50p to give her as change.
By chance, I looked down and happened to notice the Peter Rabbit 50p was half-buried in my till. The last coin she needed. I quickly fished it out, turned it face up so the lady didn't see the design, and gave her the receipt. Me: "Well good luck finding that last one madam, hopefully, it turns up soon!" Woman: "Thank you love, have a good shift."
She walks away but doesn't get far before looking at her change to put it in her purse. She turns around and looks at me as I’m now serving another customer. She walks past my till and silently mouths "Thank you!" I nodded my head and smiled. Rarely have I seen anyone leave our store looking as overjoyed as she was, definitely the highlight of my day.
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23. A Short Wick
I work at a candle store and this happened yesterday. An older woman came in—she was probably in her 80's but still seemed to have her wits about her. Anyway, she was going on and on about needing a small gift for a guy who did some work in the building she lived in. I told her that we carried a line of skincare and bath products for men.
She scoffed and says that would be weird. So, I said, "How about a candle?" This was because, you know, I work at a candle store. Her response made me curl a fist. She basically said, in an angry voice, "I can't give him a candle. He's not gay!" I was trying very hard to bite my tongue and remind her that we have tons of male customers and even my straight boyfriend likes our candles.
She then had the nerve to say, "That's good for him, but I cannot give the man a candle because he's not gay!" At that point, I was over it and I walked away. My manager then stepped in because she has a lot more patience for ignorance than I do. After she left and we vented about her, my manager told me that the woman ended up buying a notebook that says, "Slay the day."
24. A Picture’s Worth A Thousand Words
I work in photo finishing and I was helping a friendly lady who wanted prints off of her phone. She off-handedly mentioned that she recently lost all the photos on her phone so she was only able to get prints from the last few weeks. I found it odd that the photos would just disappear when the phone was still working.
She insisted, despite being "technology illiterate," that she didn't accidentally delete them. She also offhandedly mentioned that she thought her phone had a memory card in it. This needed further investigation. I fully expected her to not have a micro SD card, since many older folks call the Sim Card a memory card, but lo-and-behold there was one inside.
I put the card into one computer and it didn't show up at all, so I tried our Windows PC instead and it told me the disk was unformatted. Likely corrupted somehow by her cheap off-brand Android. I didn't want to get her hopes up, but since Windows was able to see it, I thought there might be a chance...So I took a deep breath, formatted it, and threw it into our recovery software.
I was able to recover 90% of the photos and video on that card. The lady had been waiting for her prints anyway, so I waved for her to come around to my computer and take a look. She looked at the photos on the screen and literally started bawling. It was all her most important pictures: Her grandson's grad, her dog that had passed a few months ago, family trips.
Years’ worth of pictures that weren't backed up anywhere. In the end, she bought a new Micro SD and I gave her a DVD of the pictures at no charge. After paying, she ran behind the counter and gave me a big hug. I later found out that she hand-wrote my boss a letter and said it was the best customer service she'd ever had. Today has been a good day.
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25. Sole Cost
I no longer work retail, but I used to work at an extremely discounted store, something like Marshalls, TJ Maxx, etc. This incident actually happened a few nights before my last day. We were about to close, and this lady came up to my register to check out. She handed me a pair of Michael Kors baby shoes and asked me how much they are.
I told her the price—$27—and she flipped! She retorted that the price could not be correct. I calmly said, “They are $27, ma’am. Did you still want them?” She replied, “I want them but not for that price.” She clearly wanted a discount. I had to clarify: “I’m sorry, ma’am, we don’t do discounts. We’re already an extremely discounted store.”
She said in disbelief, “$27 for baby shoes?! That’s crazy.” So, seeing her reluctance to pay that much, I assumed that she did not want to buy them anymore. Thus, I offered to put them back for her. She stopped me angrily, saying, “Uh hello? I said that I want them!” I acceded to that but firmly maintained my stance by saying, “OK, ma’am. They’re still going to be $27 though.”
She refused to believe me and asked me to check again. So, I flipped the computer screen around and showed her the price. At that moment, she did not know what to do because she was wrong, so she snapped at me to get my manager. The said manager came, confirmed the price, then left.
I thought that was the end of it, but no. Karen then said, “I just don’t understand why they are so much?” I tried to make her understand by saying, “Well, these are Michael Kors, one of the more expensive brands we carry here. If you were to buy these anywhere else then they’d be at least $100. You’re actually getting a pretty good deal.”
She still refused to budge and said, “I just don’t believe you. That’s not the real price. And you should know, I work for the Attorney General, and it would be a shame if you lost your job because you’re making up prices.” Still trying to maintain my cool, I replied, “There’s no benefit for me to lie to you.” She finally became quiet.
What was she thinking? Consider this, lady. I get paid $9 an hour to scan items. What on earth makes you think I make commission? If you want Michael Kors goods then you have to pay Michael Kors prices, even though this was already a bargain.
26. Pay It Forward
Let's set the scene real quick. I'm a supervisor at one of the main grocery stores in Australia. I'm currently filling in a shift at another nearby store. At the time, I was manning the self-serve checkouts and I notice three kids come in by themselves (no parent) with one pushing a scooter. Now, these kids were about 10-15 years old probably.
They looked like your typical trouble-making kids you see running around everywhere, although they did comply with instructions when I told them they couldn't ride their scooter in the store. One of them grabbed a chocolate bar and purchased that and started to eat it while the others grabbed a 24-pack of soft drink cans.
The two with the soft drink cans proceeded to come through self-serve and start to put money into the machine, but then they noticed they were short. While they are discussing urgently why they were short and if the chocolate bar guy spent their money, one realized he had lost a $5 note. I was feeling in a good mood and spontaneously decided to cover the $3 for them.
They were polite and said thanks…but the reason I'm writing this is for what happened next. One of the kids found their $5 they dropped on the floor outside the store, came back, and offered it to me. I refused and said they could keep it. They then asked that I take it and if any other customers were a few dollars short, I use it to cover the extra, as their way of paying it forward.
I accepted, put the money in our loose change tin, and sort of wished their parents were around so I could tell them they had raised some awesome kids.
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27. Limits Are For Other People
This happened around the time when Walmart had just announced its pickup service. We had no sort of "do your shopping for you" or personal shopper positions, so I should have seen the immediate red flag when my customer service manager (CSM) approached a coworker and asked if I wanted to be a personal shopper.
I was mid-transaction, and the coworker was chanting to herself, "Please say yes, please say yes, please say yes." But I was 19 and naive and still believed cranky last-minute Christmas shoppers were the only problem creatures. I also wanted to make my co-worker happy, so I said, "Uh, sure." My CSM briefed me on the woman who had only $85.
I was told to make sure that she stayed around $85, and that was the only introduction or warning I got before I was sent off with the lady, who I never learned the name of, but I will call Audrey, as she was just as cartoonishly whiny as the little girl from the old Little Audrey cartoons. The first red flag that I saw was that she immediately walked over to the garden center to see the Christmas clearance items.
I had just met Audrey, so I assumed she was certainly old enough to know her limits. She was probably around 65 if I had to guess. So, I followed her. But boy, oh, boy, was I entirely wrong. We walked around the garden center and she took notice of the special perfume and cologne sets that companies get specifically as Christmas gift ideas.
She grabbed one and said that it looked really nice and that she would love to try it out. She then placed it in her cart and proceeded to pick out sets for various family members—some nice slippers with vibrators in them to massage your feet, and not one, not two, but three Christmas yard decorations with lights.
I politely informed her that she already had easily over $150 worth of stuff in her cart, and she asked me whether I was sure. So, I totaled up the price of all the stuff in her cart and then added on sales tax. She reluctantly put back several of the perfume sets and two of the lawn decorations, and we departed for the next area of the store.
Since she was old-fashioned, she still used a landline phone and informed me that she needed AA batteries for it. She said that she wanted to get rechargeable ones, to save money, and I agreed that may be a good idea...until she picked out $30 batteries. We spent a lot of time there because she specifically wanted batteries that indicated on the package that they were good for phones.
I got her to put back two more Christmas items, but some of her more expensive items remained in the cart. Then I asked her if she was ready to check out—she informed me that she still had to get her groceries. I had easily spent 45 minutes with this lady but I was long overdue for my break...my stomach sank so far that I had to scoop it up off the floor.
But I followed her as she picked out her groceries, all the while reminding her that she had a limited amount of money. At that point, I fully understood why my CSM would lie about this. Once again, I informed her that she had over $150 in her cart so she put a few items back; though, she did not believe me when I still insisted that she was over budget.
Instead, she insisted that we head to the checkout to confirm. Maybe she was one of those people who had to see her total to believe it, or maybe she was just being dumb, but I was too mentally exhausted to deal with it, so I just followed her to a checkout lane and unloaded her cart of items for her. When he recognized her, the cashier looked at me and nodded.
He then asked, "How long did it take?" To that, I indicated that it had been over an hour and he rolled his eyes, saying that sounded about right. But my ordeal was far from over—the cashier rang up all of her stuff with me there to bear witness, and he did not know her limit this time.
So, he did not say anything when we passed it. We made it to something like $193, and Audrey looked at her total and said, "Oh..." She took off a few slabs of meat, which brought it down around $20, and then handed the cashier a flavored drink enhancer and stared at him expectantly. The total was still $172, and she passed him another flavored drink enhancer.
I informed her that we might have to take off one of her more expensive items, like her perfume set or her slippers. She insisted on the slippers but decided the perfume could go. Great! That brought it down to $161, which was still progress. She inched the total down a few items at a time, all the while insisting certain items were off-limits.
I thought she put back the batteries and replaced them with regular batteries since those were much cheaper. The guy had since turned off his light but he still had a line. With his replacement cashier now present and the light still off, we were all trying to talk the lady down from everything she still insisted was necessary.
When we got her down to $120, she started asking us if she could just have some of her items The cashier seemed to know where this was going and told her she could have them if she paid for them. We tried several times to pry more items out of her transaction, but she insisted she needed everything that was left in the cart. It was a nightmare.
She started asking the replacement cashier if she could help her afford the items, to which the cashier told her no. She could literally lose her job for trying to do that. She then turned to the man behind her and asked for money, and he was about to offer to pay the remaining cost until the cashier gave him a look and requested that he please not do that. Clearly, this woman had done this before.
She then told the lady that she was not allowed to solicit at our store and that she was going to have to put some stuff back. Defying the advice, the nice customer behind us gave her $10. The lady put back another frozen item and was at $115. All she would need to do is to put back her cheap plastic lawn ornament...but she continued to whine about how she really needed it and how it would make her yard look so much nicer.
At that point, I sighed and decided to just take the item off her transaction, pay for it myself, and give it to the lady. I was done with it entirely. The cashier, however, told me that I could not do that and that I could lose my job for it. But I took the item to punch out for my break, grabbed my wallet from the back, then purchased the item and gave it to the lady.
I told her that I did not even have a yard and I just wanted it to be over with. The CSM later decided to just ban the lady from the store. I was also allowed to take it easy for the rest of the day. A very stressful ordeal, but the closest thing I could have gotten to a happy ending. And no, I didn't get in trouble, much to my relief.
28. Girl Boss
A long time ago, in a galaxy far away, I was a young soldier. I loved the Army, and I wanted to make it my career. I did it for a long time. Then I got injured. I couldn't do the job I was trained on anymore. So I got out and looked for other jobs. I do medical screening now, and I'm older than everyone but two people in the entire building.
My immediate supervisor is 24. She's fairly young. One day, a person didn't like her vitals and insisted that my boss did them wrong. There was absolutely no way her blood pressure was that high, you don't know what you're doing, that kind of stuff. I came back from a break and this woman points at me and goes, "I want your boss doing it. Him! You! Show her how to do this."
I said, "Lady, she's my boss." She goes, "I don't have time for this. Read my vitals and deal with her after." My boss kind of smiled and I took her seat. I ran vitals again and got the same result. I said, "Well, I got the same result.” Then I dropped the mic. I said, “Unfortunately, I need a supervisor to sign off on a correction. Let me get my boss."
I stood up, turned to her, and said, "Hey, when you get a chance, can you confirm these corrections?" She said, "Yeah, I'm going to take a 10-minute break, but as soon as I get back, I'll knock that out." I turned to the woman. "Sorry, Ma'am. I can't overrule my boss.”
29. On The Edge
A lady demanded that I call her a manager today. She wanted to complain about how some items did not have a price on them while others did. She started interrogating me about pricing protocol, but I was on SCO duty today. Though, since I'd never seen her in the store before, I lied and said that I had nothing to do with stocking.
The manager arrived and Queen Karen launched into a full-fledged rant. Then, while she was at the counter complaining, she added a very hand-flailing, gestured complaint that the counter edges were too rough and sharp. She went as far as to say she was lucky that she did not injure herself, otherwise she would have called the health board. I wipe that counter down probably 200 times every day.
I assure you, there is nothing sharp about it because I would be among the first to raise a concern about it if there was. The employees where I work are very aware of how something small like a sharp edge on a cart can end up with a potential lawsuit in this crazy economic and opportunistic climate in which we live right now.
My manager handled it well, but the other associates and I couldn't stop laughing about it all shift. Their loud proclamations about how such-and-such—mostly random things like the color scheme, etc.—could have been fatal for us were just absurd.
30. That’s Nutrageous
I work as a manager at a small chain of grocery stores. I am putting away my main order of the week when a woman comes in asking for a Nutrageous bar. I told her with a smile we had some right in front of the store—as I pointed right to a blank spot on the shelf. Turns out, we had sold out over the weekend, and I had just broken this poor woman's heart and shattered her dreams with false hope.
She had been searching relentlessly for weeks and couldn't find one anywhere. I apologized for the bad fortune and said I would order more straight away. The woman sighed, bowed her head, and walked out of the store like a dejected puppy. I turned back to the order, opened the tub, and right on top was a brand new box of Nutrageous bars. I tear open the box and vault over the counter like an officer sliding over a car hood, sprinting out the door like I had just clocked out.
I caught up to her just as she starts to pull away from my store, most likely on her way to jump off a bridge, hoping to find a Nutrageous bar waiting for her in the next life. She turned and saw me lumbering towards her, holding the candy bar like a newborn child I had just delivered into this world. I had never seen someone so happy over a candy.
She runs to me like she was a veteran returning home from duty and running towards their children for that first swirling embrace. I tell her to have it on the house and have a good day. Then just now, I get a call from my district manager demanding to know if I was the one who gave away a candy bar to a customer for free. “Shoot,” I think to myself, “I do something nice for someone and this witch calls my boss to tell on me.”
So I tell my boss, “Yeah, it was me.” He tells me that she called and was so happy with our company she would be choosing us for the local volunteer firefighter appreciation gifts this year. $2,000 in gift cards, $25 each for the volunteers. My boss says he is giving me a 10% commission for the gift cards. Minus the price of a Nutrageous bar.
31. Make Way
So, I work at a grocery store chain and Tuesdays are what we refer to as "Specials Day." Basically, it's my job to change out last week's special with the current week's special. It is a long and painful project that I volunteered for when I got promoted because I like doing projects that other people do not.
That day, I was doing my thing in the specials aisle. I started getting gradually more and more annoyed since the whole process would be three times faster if they just let me do it when the store was closed, but, for some baffling reason, they wanted the customers to interact with me as I was occupied with 10 pallets of random things.
Near the end of my ninth pallet, I had myself basically pinned into a corner of the aisle. This was a strong nonverbal language that should have signaled to the customers, "Hey, maybe don't walk this way. I'll have to step around my pallet, move my pallet jack, and reset myself if you do." But lo and behold, trouble was headed my way—a lady came walking down the aisle, approaching me at the end.
I am a chill guy, but I don't really talk much to the customers because my store is in an upper-class area and the wealthy folks don't like getting spoken to by some sweaty dude in a uniform. So, when she kept walking towards me, I realized that she was going to try and walk around my pallet or, God forbid, walk on it.
I quickly moved my jack and the pallet and looked up at the ceiling, questioning God for creating oblivious customers. Apparently, that look at the ceiling really truly infuriated her. At first, as she walked through the suddenly clear path, she apologized half-heartedly in that way only some types of customers can pull off.
But her apology read more like "Oh, I am sorry wage person. I sure hope I didn't inconvenience you with my presence." I nodded my head at her "apology" and turned back to move my jack and pallet back to where I was working. Apparently, not only did she expect me to move, but she also really expected me to graciously tell her it was no problem that she made me move my entire working station so she could save 15 steps.
Between not accepting her apology and looking at the ceiling for about three milliseconds, she decided right then and there that I was a menace and needed a talking to. She started with the basic criticism of me being a retail grunt who didn't have a big fake grin on my face the entire day. She topped it off with the classic line that always gets my blood boiling: “I do not think you should be working here if that is going to be your attitude.”
She said that while looking at me like I was an animal in a zoo exhibit. I did not reply and just kept working. “What's the worst that can happen?” I thought. I cannot please everyone. Then she got in line. Now, the line to the checkout is situated about 10 feet from where I was working. At that point, the villain, in her mind, had her walkway obstructed.
She went out of her way to loudly criticize me and complain about how I should not be allowed to work at the store. Now, I will be honest with you, I should have just let her have her moment. If I had let her just screech and complain, it probably would have ended there. Maybe a phone call or strongly worded email to corporate. No biggie. I should have just smiled and kept working.
But there was a part of me that needed her to know that yelling at customers about how terrible I am is not how we did things at our store. So, I told her, calm as I could, that she needed to stop making a scene. And when I say something snapped in this woman, it was like someone hit a light switch. Immediately, her phone was recording me and everything got a lot more dangerous.
She was asking leading questions like, "Did you just tell me I can't talk to other customers?" and "Do you think you have the right to break my first amendment?" and "Who's the manager here?" Now, there are two things you can do when someone gets their phones out and records you. You can walk away, potentially get followed, and then you can ask them to stop recording.
Or you can be a fool like me and ask them to stop recording you right away. The latter method, naturally, led to her screaming even louder and accusing me of being a terrible person. She randomly started threatening me, saying that she could have me fired whenever she wanted. At that point, I was just trying to get her to leave.
She had made the scene worse by recording and trying to be the next viral "look at how bad I was treated" internet star, and it was clear that she just wanted to capture my angry reaction on film. I am glad to report that I did not get angry with her. I did not raise my voice at all. I just stood there and let her scream at me. As she finally finished paying for her groceries, I asked her again to please leave if she was going to continue making a scene.
This led to her sitting behind the cashiers and between the doors and waiting for me to walk away so that she could leave. I informed her that I needed to see her leave. She said that she was not leaving until I was out of her sight. I stood my ground and told her that she needed to leave or I would be forced to call the authorities.
Oh, God. She had the wrong reaction to that statement. Most of the time, if someone says, "Hey, this might need to become an official matter," the natural human reaction is to reevaluate what they are doing and decide if they want to continue. For reasons only God knows, this customer's reaction was "Good, call them. I want them here."
Here's the thing. I was not ever going to call them. It was a bottomless threat. What was I going to say to them? "There is a lady screaming at me and recording me?" Worst case scenario, this woman makes the whole situation into some kind of bigger issue and I end up on the news. So, my bluff having been called, I walked into the office and called my direct manager.
I told her what had happened and she basically told me to get back out there and deescalate the situation. I went back to the registers and I actually decided that the best course of action was to tuck tail and just apologize. So, I did. I said to her, "I'm really sorry you had a bad experience today. I hope you can come back and shop here. I understand what went wrong and I will gladly give you corporate's information." And then I told her to have a good day, indicating the door as I said that.
She sort of accepted my apology. Of course, she still went on about how I was terrible and how I should not work there, but at least she calmed down a little...until she mentioned she was an "investigator." Not seeing a uniform or a badge, I asked her what I thought to be a natural and reasonable question.
I asked, "An investigator for who?" Her exact reply was, "Do not play stupid. You know what kind of investigator.” Then she went on to say that she was going to call corporate, let them know that I was only harassing her because she was an immigrant (which was ironic since I am an immigrant too) and that I should expect not to have a job in the next 24 hours.
I just sat there and took it. There was nothing else I could do, really. Sometimes you just have to let them screech so they will leave. As she finally turned to leave, she noticed that I was watching her. So, she came back and said that I could not watch her leave because I was "going to attack" her outside.
I clammed up even more at that comment. As a final shot, she told me that she had "the means to retaliate" in her car and that she'd "gladly use it" if I come outside. She finally left and I called my boss, breaking down in tears of pure frustration, telling her how the de-escalation went. My boss assured me that she was just a crazy lady and that she, my boss, would have my back if this turned into a bigger deal.
32. Wii Woes
I worked in a store selling DVDs, CDs, games, vinyl, and a bunch of other entertainment-related stuff. This story took place the day after the launch of the Nintendo Wii. Our store had guaranteed that if you had pre-ordered a Wii by a certain date then you would get one. If you had not pre-ordered, then it was first come, first served for the remaining stock.
No one was able to place an order or reserve one after the release day as we could not guarantee when we would get stock back in. The day after the release, we had just opened and I was standing by the entrance of the door to greet customers when this big angry-looking guy comes charging through the door straight up to me ...
Customer: Do you have any Nintendo Wiis in stock? Me: Hi, I'm sorry we sold out of the stock we had yesterday. On hearing this, the customer stamped his foot and slammed his shopping bags against his side. I knew at that point drama was about to unfold. Customer: Right, well I want to pre-order one. Me: I'm sorry, we can no longer take pre-orders as it's now after release day and we cannot guarantee when we will receive stock back in since the product is in such high demand.
Customer: That's a lie! Me: What? Customer: You are lying to me. I was in here two weeks ago and was told if I pre-ordered I was guaranteed one on the day of release! At this point, I'm thinking maybe I've misunderstood and he has in fact pre-ordered, so I make an attempt at clarifying. Me: Oh, are you here to collect a pre-order? Do you have your order slip and receipt?
Customer: No I don't have a slip, you should have one for me because I enquired about wanting one weeks ago! Either give me one now or order one for me! My son wants one! Me: That's not how it works, unfortunately, we only pre-order with a deposit. If you have not paid a deposit then we do not have a pre-order for you. I cannot order you one either, as our system will not let us.
Customer: This is ridiculous! Get me a manager right now, as you are obviously incapable of sorting this mess out. I'm not leaving here without the Wii! As angry as this guy already was, he was about to get even angrier. I now had to inform him that I was in fact the manager on duty and the only one around. The guy flipped out.
He was pointing his finger in my face, calling me a liar, telling me there is no way some little girl was a manager. Just as I was starting to worry this guy was about to physically assault me, something wonderful happened. I felt something brush over the top of my shoulder from behind, and suddenly the customer’s face dropped and he was being dragged towards the door.
Unbeknownst to me, our security guard had just come on shift and was just entering the shop floor when he heard the customer screaming at me. He walked straight up from behind me, grabbed the guy by his neck, and dragged him outside backward, telling him "You're done." Once outside, the guy stood between me and the security guard.
He was almost foaming at the mouth with rage for a good minute before turning and storming out of sight.
33. Showering The Troubles Away
I am a shift manager two days a week and a cashier for three at a truck stop and rest area. We have fast-food restaurants, showers, parking for big rigs, and passenger vehicles. Today's troubles, like most of the trouble I encounter, revolved around showers. A driver came down, plopped his wet towels on the counter (even after my cashier directed him to a towel bin), and then threw his key onto the pile.
The cashier asked him, again, to place the towels in the bin. He finally grabbed them and said, "Oh, so you guys do not have to touch them." I replied, "Yes, policies have changed some due to the pandemic." In truth, that has been the policy for at least the three years I have worked there, but this seemed to be the quickest way to resolve the matter.
My cashier asked him what shower he was in, and instead of speaking, he held up the numbered key. Though, his finger was blocking the number, so we could not see what it was. When my cashier reached for it, he raised it higher so he had to stretch to get it. At that point, I was starting to get really irritated. His behavior was just so unnecessary.
I told the driver, "Way to make it complicated." This man lost his mind. He got right into my face and said he would slap me hard. I told him to leave, and he started flexing like he was actually going to throw a punch but said, "I'm not going to go for you. But want to know what I will do? I will find your family and mess them up.”
I pulled my cellphone out and started recording. The store manager then arrived at the building and heard the tail end of our shouting match with each other. He stepped in between us when the driver came too close. The driver started shouting at him, " Don't get involved, bro. You don't want none of this." My boss replied, "This is my property."
The driver calmed down very quickly, and they stepped outside. My boss told him exactly the same things I had; that he was not to return, etc. The end. Fast forward to the end of my shift—we had yet another driver issue. So, the policy for our showers is that we hold onto something as collateral until we get the shower key and the towels back. 99% of the time, it's a non-issue.
The other 1% of the time, it's a mess. This time, a driver came down, and since my cashier had a few people in line, I thought to ask the driver if he had brought the towels down. The driver said that he had not because he had not been told to do so. The cashier clarified that they had, in fact, told him. The driver just shrugged and said, “I don't care, man. I have a Lyft outside waiting. Give me my keys.”
He had left his personal keys as collateral, but since we did not get our items back, I told him he would have to get the towels. He became belligerent to both me and my cashier. At that point, the overnight manager was in, so he got some too. This went on for a few moments; then, in what I thought was a bluff, he said he was calling the authorities.
Spoiler alert, it was not a bluff. Like the guy at the start of my shift, I started recording on my phone. And this guy actually threatened me. After about seven minutes or so, a couple of officers arrived. The guy was belligerent with them too, and he pushed the cashier to the point where they told him he needed to back up and calm down.
One of the troopers came to the back desk where we dealt with the showers. The driver, at that point, looked like he was about to break down in tears. The trooper asked about our policy, and it was explained. The driver told him what he told us, "I am here for a shower. In and out. I do not have time for this. I have a Lyft outside. I just want my keys."
In what I thought would be the best moment of my day, the trooper escorted him upstairs to the showers and made him get the towels. We gave him his keys and receipt for the shower, but I added that after today, we did not want him back on the property. The trooper and the driver walked away, but the trooper made sure that he acknowledged what he had been told.
He asked him, "Did you hear what the manager said? You're not welcome here anymore. If you return, you will be charged with trespassing." I left a note for my boss about what had happened and went home. If the driver had simply said, "Oh sorry, guys. I forgot," or if he just didn't act the way he did, then we would have just given his things back. But he wanted to be petty about it.
I am better at the petty game. My takeaway from today is that my boss is pretty awesome. He had my back, stepped between me and a guy who audibly threatened to harm me and others. He probably will not appreciate that I let the second incident go as far as it ended up going but it is what it is. Sometimes, in retail, you just have to defend yourself.
34. A Teeny Tantrum
A few years ago, I was working at a used videogame store. I was behind the counter, doing morning inventory, when a teenager came in. Teen: Hey, I pre-ordered a copy of this game here last week. Is it in yet? Me: Let me check for you. Do you have an ID? I check his ID, and he is only 16. The game he pre-ordered was rated M, so I couldn't sell it to him.
Me: Sorry buddy, looks like this game is rated M. I can't sell it to you because you are under the age of 18. Is one of your parents in the car? Teen: NO! I PAID FOR THE GAME! I WANT IT! Me: Believe me, I want nothing more than to give it to you. You are right, you have paid for it. Company policy, however, restricts me from selling it to you.
Teen: DO YOU KNOW WHO I AM? DO YOU KNOW WHO MY FATHER IS? Me: Buddy, I'm on your side. I want to sell the game to you, but my hands are tied. Just come in with your parents or a big brother or even an older friend. I can give it to you then. Teen: Enjoy the unemployment line. He exits. And I think nothing more about it. This happens once a week.
The next day, my boss calls me and asks to meet me at the coffee shop next door before my shift. He commonly does this to go over monthly numbers. Manager: Thanks for meeting me. Me: Sure thing. Manager: Yesterday, did you have a kid come in asking to purchase a game that he pre-ordered? Me: Sure did, he was underage so I didn't sell it to him.
Then I go over the conversation with my boss. Manager: I know you followed policy, but that kid's father is a well-respected businessman in the area. The boy's father called my boss's boss, who in turn called me. I'm sorry, I have to let you go. Me: ARE YOU SERIOUS? For following company policy? Manager: Yeah, it sucks, but the father is influential in town and he suggested we let you go, and here I am.
But you get two weeks’ severance. Don't worry about your shift today, I'm covering for you. I need your keys and your badge. Just like that I was unemployed. All because I followed corporate policy.
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35. Smoke Signals
We had a new employee start yesterday. She seemed to be a very sweet girl in her late teens and had a great sense of humor. I took a liking to her instantly. She had never been in charge of a register before, so I was put in charge of training her. I showed her the ropes and let her take over, staying close by in case she needed me.
When it was quiet, I taught her what the procedure was when it came to smokes. She asked me if she had to ID everyone and I told her that she would have to use her judgment. If a person seemed younger than 21 to her, then she should go for it. If they looked older, then it wouldn't be necessary. She seemed to understand, and she was getting the hang of the register quickly.
I figured that I could stop shadowing her and let her do her thing. I told her that I was going to do some stocking, but that I would be close by if she needed anything. In fact, I would be no more than an aisle over. She smiled and said OK. About 10 minutes went by, and I heard somebody yelling. All I could hear the girl say was: “I am sorry, sir,” in the most terrified tone.
I came over to find this old man screaming at her. She was hunched over and looked like she was about ready to cry. Apparently, he had told her that he wanted a particular brand of smokes. She gave him the wrong ones twice and was slow to find the right ones, and then she asked him for his date of birth when she rang it up.
He was yelling about how he was in a rush and needed to go. He saw me and said, "Hey, can you ring me up? This woman does not know anything." I looked at her and saw the tears rolling down her face. That was not OK. I told him to not talk to my coworker that way and informed him that it was her first day. He said, “I see that, but I have to go.”
I told him that he obviously did not because if he did, then he would not be screaming at her. He replied with a threat, saying that if I said one more thing, he would never come back to support our store. That was fine with me. I did not want customers who disrespect employees in the store anyway. In the cheeriest tone I can muster, I told him to have a fantastic day.
He stormed out muttering and I consoled the new girl. She was full-on sobbing at this point. What a horrible first day that had to have been. All because some mean person could not show a little empathy.
36. Putting A Karen In Her Place
This happened to me about a month or so ago and I am still relishing in the glory. I work at a large US auto parts store Now, this money bags guy is a regular customer, and when he comes in, we jump for joy as his purchases are in the thousands of dollars. I am helping this guy look up parts and getting them for him when this lady walks in and rushes to the seat cover aisle.
She grabs the ugliest bejeweled faux leather seat cover and rushes up to the front. Her: The prices on these covers outrageous! $60 for these?! (I do agree that the price is high and would have helped her). Me: Ma'am, I will be with you in just a second after I finish helping this man. Or my manager will be here in a moment and he will help you. I am sure—
Her: NO! You will help me now! I have money! And you will stop being a lazy jerk and help me right now! So my manager walks up. Manage: can I help you, ma'am? Her: Yes, tell your lazy employee to do his job! At this point, I stop listening to her and continue helping the money bags man, who actually points to the seat cover in her hand.
Man: Do y'all have any more of those? Me: Let me check. Yes, three more besides that one. Man: Can you please get them for me? So I get them, and as I’m in the process of that, the money bags man looks at the rude customer lady. Man: You gonna buy that?
Her: I haven't decided yet! But he grabs it and tells me he wants to buy all four with cash. I make the sale—and that’s exactly when he gets sweet, sweet revenge. He proceeds to take them out of the boxes and cut them into ribbons in front of the lady, then throws them away with a huge smile. He then returned to me to finish his shopping list that ended up being a whopping $4k+ sale.
The lady’s jaw dropped, but she couldn’t do a thing.
37. Behind The Doors
I just finished working the weekend and, boy, reopening after a lockdown has really brought out the geniuses, huh? Yes, please take your sweet time, ignore the store hours since they are clearly just a suggestion. It is not like we have lives or would like to get home before it starts pouring out. Keeping in line with the genius parade, on Friday, some dude waltzed in 10 minutes before closing.
I greeted him and asked if I could help him find what he was looking for since we were closing soon. He didn't really answer. Fast forward nine and a half minutes—I caught him talking to my coworker for the greater part of his visit, and I knew immediately that he would be trouble. He was mostly about random topics, but clearly, she did not care. Unfortunately, she was too nice to cut the guy off and say that she was busy.
I start the closing ritual for the store, which involved turning off the open sign, flipping the sign by the door, closing the doors, etc. I also tried to make more noise than usual so that the guy noticed what I was doing. Of course, he did not, since he was too far into his story about wanting to be a hairdresser or something.
I waited about 30 seconds before I abruptly interrupted. I asked my coworker if she was ready to close her register. That tipped the dude off and he finally left...he did not even buy anything. We have had more people like this, all just waiting for the store to close. Then, we have those who are the other way round. We had a woman who was standing at the doors for a while waiting for us to open, and then got into her car and left as I was walking to unlock the doors. This has happened quite a few times and I cannot really wrap my head around that logic.
38. There’s A Word For That
I used to work at a Brazilian supermarket in Florida. The customers were pretty much all Brazilians, leading to almost everybody speaking Portuguese. My parents are from there, but I was born in North America. Although I do know how to speak Portuguese, sometimes my American accent bleeds through, and sometimes I don't know a word or two.
People usually understand. But not this one lady. Boy, did she have something to say. I was behind the customer service desk so I couldn't leave, but the lady asked me where something was. It was around the corner, near a certain shelf. I couldn't remember what the word for "shelf" was, so I think I said, "fixture that holds things" or something like that.
"'Fixture that holds things'? What the heck is that? Do you even speak Portuguese?" “Yes, ma'am, I'm sorry I forgot the word for that (I point to the shelf), but what you're looking for is right around it.” Keep in mind, the shelf was in sight of both of us, but she didn't want to look. “You don't speak Portuguese. Get me someone else to help.”
I'm a little confused (I mean, it's just one word I didn't know) but my manager happens to appear and I figure she's not busy. Keep in mind, this is all in perfect Portuguese: “Maria, would you be able to help this woman? Apparently, I don't speak Portuguese so I'm not able to communicate with her. She doesn't understand anything I'm saying, because, even though it sounds like Portuguese, she said it's not, so, honestly, I'm not really sure what language I'm currently speaking.”
It turned out that Maria was well aware of this customer and she complained about everything, so she wasn't surprised that she was acting like an idiot. She almost stopped as she had to stifle some laughter during my monologue. The lady just kind of looked like someone had slapped her with an idiot stick. Serves her right.
39. With A Smile
One day, I had an old guy come through my register with lumber. I said hello to him and instead of greeting me back, he immediately told me had eight pieces of the stack of lumber on the left. I proceeded to count them and he snapped at me, saying, "I said eight!" I told him that we were supposed to count them. I completed counting and rang up those eight pieces.
He then told me that there were 10 pieces of lumber on the right side of his cart. Once again, I counted them. He said to me, "What school did you go to?" I was so confused by his question that I did not even know what to say. What was interesting is that, despite how cranky he was, he kept smiling at me as if his rude remarks weren't uncalled for.
He was also wearing his mask with his nose hanging out. Once he finished paying and I gave him his receipt, he left the store without saying thank you or anything to me. That guy is definitely up there as one of the worst customers I've ever had. Absolutely no manners and I am still disgusted by his behavior to this day.
40. Phoning It In
I work in a phone shop. One day a couple of months ago, I'm stood outside the shop at 8:50 waiting for my manager to come down and let me in. There is a middle-aged woman standing outside as well, glaring at me, tapping her foot and huffing impatiently. Uh-oh. Bad sign. At 9 am, we open the doors and she comes stomping in, straight up to me.
I open my mouth, but she doesn't give me a chance to speak. She bought her phone three months ago, and it doesn't work anymore, apparently. She wants a refund. Now before this conversation goes any further, I feel I have to point out to her straight away that a refund is not going to be possible after this length of time.
After 30 days we can send it off for repair, but that's it. "Don't argue with me!" she screeches. Okay. I ask her if I can have a look at her phone. She rolls her eyes and hands it over. After a few seconds, it becomes clear that her internal memory has been filled up with photos of her grandson etc., and so there isn't any space to install a software update.
So there isn't actually anything wrong with her phone at all. With my best retail smile, I begin to explain this to her, and mention that she can always buy an SD card and move her photos onto that, and hey presto, problem solved. Nope, she wants a refund. We're back onto that. I tell her I'm going to go and speak to my manager.
I go upstairs and we laugh at her, the usual. But he still comes back down with me to back me up because she's getting pretty horrible and we then spend another 10 minutes or so trying to convince her that literally all we can do is send her perfectly working phone off for repair. She's now telling us she's going to go to Trading Standards, quoting the Consumer Rights Act at us.
Basically, she's the biggest cliché going. Unreal. Eventually, she admits defeat. But she still wants it "repaired." So I sit her down and start to take some details. "Why do you want my details?" I am literally on the edge here. Eventually, she tells me her first name. I start to type it in (she can see the screen) as Gill, and then she says "Mo you stupid girl, it's spelled J... I... L... L" (speaking slowly).
I raise my eyes to her and give her a big sickly sweet smile and apologize profusely. I then ask her for her surname. "Let's see if you can spell THIS right, shall we?" At which point, I sit back and I say, "I'm sorry, but I'm not going to serve you." She goes bright red and starts sputtering. Kicking off, calling me thick, rude, etc., etc. My manager comes over and tells her calmly to leave.
"I'm taking this all the way to the top!" "Feel free, but please leave."
41. Powered Up
On one Saturday afternoon, we had a power surge followed by an outage. It affected all of downtown, but the store was not notified. Now, you would think that people would be understanding...but there was not one empathetic soul in our store that day. People started complaining that we did not have a backup generator. This was, in their eyes, totally the employees’ fault too.
We had one register that could still ring, but the card reader was down, so it was cash only. And the belts would not move. All of this should be obvious, but no. We got questions like, “You mean I can't use my bank card?” despite the fact that we had been repeating that for the last 20 minutes. Add to the mix this one lovely man who kept shouting, "Time to get out the pencils and paper!" because we most definitely know the price of every item in the store.
We finally got everyone out, locked the doors, and put stuff away to enjoy 30 minutes of bliss. The instant the power went back on, people were beating on the door. My manager told them everything had to reboot but, of course, they wanted to shop during that time instead of waiting five more minutes.
42. You Done Right
A mother just came into my (very small) retail store with her three preteen kids. Normally this spells disaster. However, these kids each had a couple of $20s and thoughtfully looked through the items in the store before selecting something, bringing it up to the register, buying it with the money from their pockets, and being extremely polite.
As they left the register, the mom told the kids, "Make sure you save your receipts so we can budget tonight." One of the kids replied, "I always keep my receipts" in the most polite way possible. Good on that mom for teaching her kids the value of money and financial planning. Just wanted to share because unlike most of the dross that comes through, they made my day genuinely better!
43. Here We Go Around The Counter
I had a customer who was standing at the cash with items all over the counter, just staring at me. So, I sidled up and cashed them out. All of sudden, the customer left and started browsing the store some more. When he moseyed back up to the counter just moments later, I asked him if he was all set. He said nothing and went off again to look at something else.
Then, after some time, the customer stood impatiently before the register, proclaiming sourly, "Can I get some help over here? I'm ready to cash out." It took everything in me to not give a bratty reaction. As I was ringing him up, I also got hit with the old, "No, I always get 10% off," even though our item rewards system has literally been only 5% off for the past 10 years.
But no, this guy said he always gets a deal here. I had never seen the guy before in my life, but okay. Needless to say, they did not get the claimed discount.
44. I’d Prefer Not To
This lady was talking to a friend of hers while making eye contact with me the whole time while I was on the till. Her friend asked her what she was doing. "I'm discarding what I don't want." She was leaving miscellaneous food items on the jewelry counter, and then promptly got in my line. I asked her, "Can you bring me those items you just discarded on the jewelry?"
See, I don't like my store looking like a disaster—imagine that. Her reply made my blood boil. She snakily replies, “No, not right now. I have places to be.” She places her items on my counter as I just stand there looking at her. She asks if I'm going to ring her up. I reply, "No, not right now." I step out from behind the till, walk slowly over to the jewelry counter, and pick up the items in question.
I take my time putting them in the returns cart. Nothing else is said for the remainder of the transaction.
45. Not A Know-it-all
This customer came in 10 minutes before closing. She was looking at jeans up until closing with the help of one of our newer staff members. He had been hired six months ago for the holiday season but received only one shift weekly. At closing, I told my coworker that we were closed, so he told the customer that he would have to bring the items to be cashed out.
The customer continued looking anyway. My coworker took me aside and spilled the truth about the situation—he told me that the guy was being aggressive and almost yelling at him to help. When he came up to the cash, he complained about not being able to find the jeans that he was looking for and said that my coworker should not have been hired because he did not know anything at all.
Bear in mind that my coworker normally works in our shoe department, so he does not know much about casual wear. He then wanted us to call another store in order to look for his size. It was five minutes after closing, so obviously, no one picked up. The cashier told him that, and he decided to ask for the manager as if that was going to do anything.
Since I am the shift leader, I was the acting manager. I turned around and asked him what he needed, and he started going on about how I needed to hire people with more experience. First of all, I don't even hire people. Secondly, this was the kid's first job—he was barely 16, and he was one of the nicest, most eager-to-please employees that we have.
I almost lost it at that customer. I told him not to talk about my employees like that. I do not even remember what else I said before my cashier jumped in to de-escalate the situation. Maybe I overreacted, but my coworker feels like the little brother at our store.
46. A Little TLC
I work in a technology retailer as a technology sales associate, and I have a plethora of stories about people being tech-illiterate. This is not one of them. Today, a man who earlier today bought ink for his inkjet printer, was looking for a laser printer alternative. I went up to him and asked what he was looking for, in the hopes of finding the best possible printer for him.
After roughly 10-15 minutes of friendly back-and-forth, we pick out a few that would work perfectly for him. I assumed this new printer wasn’t a top priority considering he'd bought ink earlier. Since none of our printers were on sale, I told him I'd write down some dates the printers will most likely be going on sale on.
He looked pretty happy about that and thanked me. I proceeded to write down all the printers we decided would work for him, every possible sale day in the next month, prices of toner, and what each of the important notes was for each printer. I go to hand him my note, and he's wiping tears off his face. Me: Are you alright, Sir?
Him: Yeah, wipes his face, I just haven't felt cared for very much recently...I went in for surgery earlier this month, and nobody so much as gave me a phone call. Thank you for spending this time with me today, I appreciate it. I took my break right after that because I was about to start tearing up too and I didn’t want to make him feel embarrassed.
47. Selective Vision
Today, I had two unrelated customers really get under my skin. Most of the time, I shrug off mean customers. I let them complain and then reply with "Sorry, company policy" or some other non-response to shut them up. But not today. And the first one was a doozy. This customer was an older lady who had bought four packages of hot dogs.
We currently have a sale for hot dogs: buy two and they are 99 cents each while their normal price is $2.99 each. The limit is one, so it's a pretty good deal; you save $4 overall. However, this lady was angry that only two of her hot dogs had gone for the sale price. I was called up and asked to fix it. The lady claimed that there was no limit mentioned on the sale sign.
So, I got out a sales flier, and before I had even opened it, she claimed that she doesn't read the fliers. That made me instantly angry. I set up a refund and went to get the on-shelf sale tag. And wouldn't you know it, in big bold capital letters the tag read: "Limit offer one per customer." I grabbed the sign and started to go up front to show the customer.
She saw me coming and immediately took off because the cashier had run the refund before I had a chance to get the tag. It irks me that customers can read the sale sign, but selectively ignore parts of it.
48. Animal Attraction
I work at a pet store, and I’m primarily responsible for maintaining/caring for our fish selection, birds, reptiles, small animals, and the like. Sometimes I sell them to folks who actually have a clue about owning an animal. This happened yesterday. I'm on a long nine-hour shift and having a smoke break outside of the shop.
There's a long sidewalk, and I always smoke far away from the doors as we're a heavy traffic location and kids/animals are always coming in and out. I finish up and head back inside, where I'm immediately flagged by a family looking for a cat scratcher. The particular one they want is missing its tag and I can't find its location in its aisle, so I take out my phone and hang with the family, showing them our online prices, which we'll honor for them.
They get the scratcher, hours go by, and at closing, a cashier buddy comes up to me and tells me about this woman who was raving to her a while ago. Cashier friend: She was going on and on about how “there's an employee that smokes—THEY WORK IN A PET STOR—and TEXT! They should be spoken to or fired!' I just sort of shrugged.
Me: So, she meant me. Nice. Manager friend is now walking by. Me: Hey, (manager), I need to be fired. I was smoking directly into the animal habitats while Snapchatting their purple faces as they shrieked and suffocated. Expect the corporate complaint any second now. Manager friend: Oh darn. Yeah, you're screwed. And then I went home, twirling my mustache, the most evil pet department worker ever.
49. Needing An Explanation
I had never ever encountered anyone really going off on me at work...Until yesterday. This encounter at my workplace—a burger place—involved a rude customer named Darren, his young daughter, my coworker named Karen, my manager named Bernard, and me.
At my workplace, we organize orders numerically. Once your order is finished, we call out the number and the customer comes to pick up their order at a hand-out area. Now, I am currently training for a new role, so I was close to the handout table, but not working it. I noticed a man, whom I came to know as Darren, standing in front of the table with a receipt in his hand and a burger in the other.
Obviously, I knew he had a complaint. I just didn't expect that it would go like this. I asked him if something was wrong with his order. He said that he had gotten the wrong burger. He was actually calm at this point and he sounded only a slight bit irritated, but there was nothing alarming. I apologized and asked what kind of burger he was missing.
That's when Karen, who was taking orders next to us, jumped in and said, "Oh, I think his daughter grabbed the wrong order. His order is in the back." I later told her that it was not necessary to tell the customers their mistakes in that manner because either way, we were going to fix it for them. It was faster to just fix it rather than play the blame game.
Plus, no one was going to blame her and go on some witch hunt. I just wanted to do my job. At the time, I just said that the food in the back was already cold, so I just needed to know which burger he needed." Instead of answering me, Darren said, "Wait. My daughter grabbed the wrong food though?" Karen said that was what she thought had happened.
So, Darren replied, "Well, can you tell her that? Because I do not want to start a fight if I tell her." At that point, Karen and I looked at each other confused and uncomfortable. He then waved his daughter over. They were a tall duo, but I guessed that she was around 12. I tried to avoid the situation and reiterated, “Really, I can just get the correct burger for you. It's not a big deal at all."
Darren insisted that she needed to “learn this.” I then said, "OK. Well, I did not hand out the food, so I cannot say if she grabbed the wrong order. Karen can help with that." Karen quickly washed her hands of the situation by saying, "I can't. I am in the middle of taking orders." That annoyed me and I thought, “Why were you listening to us in the first place then? Why put in your 2 cents when I was already fixing it and we had no issues?”
But my concern, at that point, was Darren, who suddenly really wanted me to do it. His tone made the situation really uncomfortable. Even his daughter started to look extremely uncomfortable. As he started getting irate, more condescending, and loud, I started to just look for a way out. He continued to insist that he wanted to talk to me and know what had happened.
I, once again, expressed my helplessness. "Yes, sir. But unfortunately, I do not know what happened. I was not here handing out the food." He kept cutting me off, so I finally said, "I am going to get my manager for you because I cannot help you any more with this." As I turned to step away, he started screaming at the top of his lungs.
He shouted, "No, don't walk away from me! Ma'am, I do not want your manager! I am not trying to create a scene here!" Everyone was staring as he was going off and I yelled out Bernard's name. Bernard came over and that is when Darren went back to his calm voice. He told Bernard that he just wanted to know what happened with his order.
I was still standing there and Bernard said, "He wants to talk to you." Darren had a condescending voice when he was talking to me. He gave a half-truth and then asked, "Is that not what happened?" So, I stood quietly, and after he asked again, I said, "Well, I mean, my manager is here. So, yes, I am agreeing that that is what happened."
I also refused to look at him because when I get angry, I cry. I was trying so hard not to let the tears out. Also, because he was bending down to my level, I wanted to punch him. Darren started saying stuff like, "Will you look at me? Why does it feel like you don't want to be talking to me? Do you even want to be here talking to me?"
When he didn't stop his aggression, I absolutely lost it. So, I said, "No, I don't. Bernard, I'm not doing this. I can't do this." And I walked away. I went to the back where three or four different coworkers checked up on me. One even offered to let me punch him to take out my anger. I did not take him up on his offer, but I love that kid.
At that point, I only had like 10 to 15 minutes left on my shift, so I got to go home. Bernard apologized to me and said he didn't expect him to speak to me that way. On one hand, I understand because Darren could come across as a normal calm customer. But on the other hand, this guy was literally just screaming at me. And he was at least 6'3 (192 cms) while I am 4'11 (125 cms).
Even his daughter was taller than me. I told Bernard that it felt a little biased because he was not as condescending with him as he was with me. But Bernard said that he felt it was more to do with height since he was just as tall and built similarly to the customer. Either way, he said that there was something off about that guy anyway, and I agree.
50. No Good Deed Goes Unpunished
This customer came in and attempted multiple times to purchase gas this morning. All three of his cards were declined, but I was in a good mood and won $200 on last night's mega millions, so I figured I'd spot him $20 for gas. He then goes to the pump, pumps $5 in, and comes back inside…to demand change. Customer: Change from pump 3, please.
Me: What? C: Change from pump 3, I only pumped $5. Me: I offered you $20 in gas. I wasn't planning on giving you change. C: Let me speak to a manager. Me: My manager is here Monday to Friday from 5 am to 8 pm. C: Give me his number. Me: Sorry, but the company doesn't provide work phones so I can't give out his personal number.
C: Where's your Corporate number? (now yelling) Me: Outside on the door. Fast forward two hours, the authorities show up. The officer tells me someone said there was a cashier here who was refusing to return people's change. I explain to the officer that I used my own money to help someone out but wasn't about to give them my change from the pump for the gas I paid for.
The officer asked to see the tapes so I call up the manager. He’s irritated about coming in on his day off. About 20-30 minutes pass and the manager arrives and shows the officer the tapes. They come out of the back office, the officer apologized to the manager, and then left. The manager then tells me that if the guy came back to the store to refuse sale and tell him he's banned from the store.
Guess it doesn't pay to be nice.
51. Too Good To Be True
To preface, it needs to be said that my store does not have coupons. We never have, and we probably never will. On this day, I had a woman come in saying that she wanted to get decor for her new house. I offered to show her what we had available. She then mentioned that she was so excited that she was going to get such a good deal.
I assumed that was because everything she was picking out was 40% off. Spoiler alert: it was not. She proceeded to spend over an hour picking out everything and having us put it behind the counter for her. That was when she finally mentioned, “Oh yes, I was so happy to get a coupon for half off of everything here,” which was the major red flag.
I then asked her if I could see it while also explaining that we did not carry in-store coupons. She proceeded to spend another 30 minutes looking for the supposed coupon. I finally got a glance at her phone and it all made sense—she had pulled up one of those websites that claim to give out coupon codes, but they usually don't work.
It even said in a big text that they uncertified codes. She was perfectly polite the entire time but explaining to her that she couldn't use any of that in-store was exhausting. I know the older generation can have trouble with stuff like that, but it was like she just could not believe that she could not use her coupons. And, of course, she had us put half of it back.
52. Closing Time
I work in a camera store, and if you're in the store before closing we'll take care of you until you buy something or wander out. Lately, I've been counting minutes to close, and then right on the hour the doors get shuttered, the open sign is turned off, and the phones are set to night ringer. Today, we closed at 5 pm.
I made a beeline for the front doors and was halfway across the floor when the doors open. A man and his wife start to enter. The man sees me, leans back outside to read our hours, turns to his wife, and says the words I never thought I'd hear a customer say. "Oh, they just closed. Let's come back tomorrow." Thank you sir, you are my hero. Also, we're closed tomorrow, but it is the thought that counts.
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53. An Apple A Day
I had a customer yesterday bring in the clearance item that he bought, which was a MacBook. He came up to the register to return it. That was no problem. For reference, I'm five feet tall and he was a big guy. I followed protocol and opened it. I then checked to see if the laptop was up and running to turn off his iCloud accounts.
When the screen turned on, it was stuck on some weird screen with a mysterious folder labeled with a question mark. That's all it displayed. I didn't give it much thought. As I was processing the return, I noticed on the receipt that the form of payment was a $43 gift card, and the rest of the $1,057 was charged to his card.
Returns work by giving back the money in the same form of payment. So, I was telling him that he would get $43 back to a gift card. He immediately got upset and tried telling me that the last guy who helped him return an item of his but not to his card, but to a gift card. So, he wanted the whole $1,100 to his card.
Normally, I would let the customer know this kind of thing, and they would be OK with it. I was a little overwhelmed, so I called my super. She was held up with something and a minute into waiting, this guy started getting aggravated. He told me, "I don't have all day! C’mon." At that point, I was begging my super on the radio, “Please, I need you here.”
She came and checked out the situation. She also investigated the MacBook. I didn't know if the guy didn't disconnect it from his iPhone yet, but his accounts were still attached to his laptop. So, he started getting even more aggravated. Eventually, I called a floor manager up. They were letting him know that there was nothing we could do on our end.
This was because he did something like wipe his system. So, he had to call Apple to disable his accounts or find out why it was not working. He was sitting there, calling Apple, and I guess he was trying to use voice commands because he kept shouting something. Then he started to argue with the floor manager again, so I just walked away to compose myself
In the end, the guy got all his money back to his card and he was still able to return the item, claiming that he'll never buy clearance items from us again.
54. If The Shoe Fits
I work in a shoe store as an assistant manager. I carry a store phone on me so I can answer it wherever I am in the store. Today, the phone would not stop ringing. People wanted to know what time we closed, where we were located, and a ton of shoe checks. So the phone rings and I answer it and it sounds like a little kid.
Kid: Umm hello, do you carry all-black high-top Vans for kids? Me: Let me check for you really quick. I'm sorry, we only have the low-top Vans in all black for kids. Kid: Okay, well I like those too. Me: What size shoe do you wear? Kid: One and a half. Me: Okay, so I don't have a one and a half but I do have a size two.
Kid: Okay, that sounds good. Me: Would you like me to hold it for you? Kid: Yes, please. Me: Okay, what is your name? The phone got really quiet like he was hesitating, then I heard someone in the background, it was his mom. Mom: Give her your name! Kid: Tyler. Me: Okay, Tyler, I'm going to hold this shoe for you. So when you and your mom come in, just come up to the counter and tell us you have a shoe on hold under your name.
Kid: Okay thank you. Have a nice day. Me: absolutely. You have a nice day too. It was the most wholesome phone call I have ever experienced in my four years of retail. I love that his mom had him call and ask about his shoes. Today was a good day.
55. Always On Clock
I finished a shift at my work and I was on my way home when I realized that I needed to do some shopping. I could not be bothered to go all the way back to my store, so I went to another shop on the way home. Mind you, I was in my work uniform and it was too hot to wear a coat over it. I was going to be in and out so thought it was no big deal.
How wrong was I?! Well, two minutes in, an elderly couple came up to me and ask, “Excuse me, do you know where the food storage bags are kept? I replied, “I am sorry but I do not work here I'm afraid. They just say, “Oh, right!” They stormed off and, although taken aback, I thought little of it. Instead, I got on with my shopping and headed to the self-service tills.
Just as I was about to finish, the couple came back and they had a manager with them! They told the manager, “This employee of yours refused to help us find our items.” The manager looked at me, then said, “I am afraid that this man does not work for us.” He pointed to my uniform saying, “He works for another company.”
The couple stared at me and said, “We thought he was making that up!” I'd never had a complaint from a customer while shopping in another store before! Well, there is always a first time.
56. Basket Case
I work in a grocery store, and the bane of my existence is people putting their grocery baskets away incorrectly. We have a pile for them to be stacked onto, but people don't care, it's usually left alone while their baskets are placed to the side, or inconveniently in a way that hinders anyone else's basket. Last Friday, a mother comes in and does just that.
She places her basket into the pile halfway, with one half in and another half out, making the pile look awful. Her 7-year-old daughter sees her do this and stares at the basket. She turns to her mother and loudly says, "What is that? You think that's acceptable?" Her mother sheepishly fixed the basket, and that girl became my hero.
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57. Cost Per Spray
I work at a thrift store, and due to COVID, there needs to be a door greeter who greets customers coming in and sprays their hands with hand sanitizer. This was what I was doing when an elderly woman came in. As I sprayed her hands, she started coughing dramatically as though this was the first time anyone had ever done that.
Then, she said, “You sprayed too much. It got into my mouth.” I immediately felt bad when she said that, but then she lost me when she said that it had gotten into her mouth. She was clearly wearing a mask. To top it off, as she walked away, she muttered something. It sounded like, “This is going to affect the amount of money I spend today.” I don’t get how that affects me, but okay.
58. You Catch More Flies With Honey…
When I was 16, I worked for my uncle. He was a tailor, but also had a clothes store next door to his main shop. He let me run the clothes store, which basically involved keeping it clean, serving customers, and displaying stock. He ran the business side of it, and I was paid to essentially sit there all day. It was a pretty quiet store in a quiet area, so it was a pretty cruisy job, great for school holidays.
Whenever we got new stock in, I would have to put the price tags on myself. Most of the clothes we sold were men's office workwear—suits, shirts, trousers, and the like. The average price for a suit was around $150-$200. One day, I had a belligerent customer come in. He saw that I was quite young, so he took to pushing me around.
He would swear and act very impatient, and would call me slow and stupid. I'd dealt with rude customers before, but this guy was far too much. To the best of my knowledge, I hadn't done anything wrong. He may have been having a bad day, but to me, that doesn't excuse the insults. He had come in quite early; usually, we opened at 9, but didn't get any customers until much later.
It was rare to get any customers before 11. That morning I had gotten a load of new stock in and hadn't finished putting on the price tags as it was a huge amount of new stock in. So, because of his rudeness, I decided to get the perfect revenge. I decided that I would charge him much, much more. Either he would decide it was too expensive, or we would make a lot more money.
He selected three suits, and I told him they were $500 for the first two, with the third being $700. They were actually around $200. We haggled a bit and I sold them for around $350 for the first two and $600 for the third. He was quite happy with what he saw as a major victory. I was quite happy I made an extra $700.
I told my uncle what happened, and he let me keep a percentage of the money as a bonus. My uncle knew that particular customer and had had issues with him before. Perhaps it wasn't the morally correct thing to do, but it serves to show you shouldn't be rude.
59. In The Know
This happened this past weekend at my shop. The customers were one of those annoying couples who'd regularly come in and ask questions every time. They would ask things like where the bin bags were or where the rice was as if they weren’t here literally all the time. One day, this couple came up to my till and I start scanning through the items.
Suddenly, the man said, “Can you press subtotal at the end?” I said that I would. This was because, obviously, I was going to have to do it anyway. I thought he was just particular or did not really understand how it worked. Anyway, the total came to around $55 and they were not very happy. They started asking me how much every item cost and to void out other items, which of course I did without a problem.
When they came to scan their voucher, the pop-up appeared as expected, telling me to get a supervisor to authorize the void. I told them, “Because you have removed some products, I have to get someone over to authorize them. They shouldn’t be too long.” The man looked at me with confusion and said, “I thought pressing subtotal would make it OK.”
This deeply puzzled me. Did he think that of all the people who ever worked my shop— till staff, supervisors, and management—that no one had ever considered or worked this out before? Did he think he, a completely random man, knew more about our till systems? That he knew more than the staff who are on them all day? Strange!
60. Pack Your Bags
I work in a travel goods store. There were a few customers browsing around the store, but no one needed any help at the moment so I was just standing by the front desk. A customer came in; an elderly man with a deep Haitian accent and okay English. He came up to me and said that he wasn't looking to buy today, but he was planning on visiting family in Haiti that he hasn't seen in over 20 years.
He said that he has been saving up money for a while and finally started planning his trip, albeit still a few months away. He just wanted something inexpensive for the one trip. So I pointed him in the right direction and he told me he was going to look around. As I walked away, another customer waved me down. He was a younger guy in what looked like a pretty expensive suit.
He started asking me some questions about some high-end brands. After about 15 minutes of talking to this other man, the Haitian man walks over and said something along the lines of, "I'm sorry to interrupt but thank you for the help, I'm not ready to buy it yet but I'll come back in a few months when I have all of my trip money together."
The man in the suit then asked him what suitcase he was looking at, and the Haitian man pointed to the cheapest one we had in the front of the store for $20. Suitman said, "You don't want those, they don't last very long the way the airlines throw stuff around. How about one of these,” and he walks over to a mid-range $70 suitcase.
The Haitian man laughed a little and said, "I can't afford those!" The younger guy blew my mind. He said, "Don't worry about that, I will pay for it." The Haitian man kind of laughed it off, thinking it was a joke or something or maybe he misunderstood. Even I was a bit skeptical. But Suitman insisted he was serious, handed me his credit card, and said to let him pick out a color.
The Haitian man reluctantly picked out a suitcase and walked over to the desk with me. He practically burst into tears when the credit card went through. After some handshaking and many thank yous, the Haitian man left. Suitman proceeded to buy $600 worth of luggage for himself and his family. Not only was it one of my biggest sales ever, but it was also the biggest random act of kindness I had ever seen in my life.
After working in retail for so long, this is something I will never forget.
61. Time Is Money
I’ve worked in customer service for two years and the amount of stuff I’ve had to deal with is enough to blast God to the 16th dimension. One time, a customer wanted something way high up on the shelves, in the depressing fluorescent lights territory. I told her that I should be back within 10 minutes because I needed to get a ladder. She said that was fine.
Now, I don't even weigh heavy enough to donate blood. I’m a petite little ballerina of a rodent with Campbell soup noodle arms. None of the other workers were around to help as they were dealing with their own stuff, so I dragged this ginormous ladder from the break room all the way across the store to get back to the lady and the merchandise.
Well, I headed back to the desolate ghost town of an aisle and find that the lady decided to take a first-class ticket to Employees’ Time Is Meaningless-Ville. She was nowhere to be seen. Okay, time is money, and people have got things to do and places to be and all that. But don’t act like your time is more valuable than mine, because it's not.
62. The Odyssey
Our store was opening up a new department, and some of the day staff had been called in to help the night staff fill the shelves for tomorrow’s big opening. There was quite a lot of night staff raucously running around throughout the store, and a small handful of day staff cloistered in the new department, shuffling around slack-jawed.
I was at the new department’s computer going over the new stock when I see someone approaching from the foreground. I look up expecting to see a staff member, but instead, I see a very heavily pregnant woman slowly waddling up to the counter. This woman is in utter shambles, her hair is disheveled, her drooping eyes are sunken and engulfed in deep dark circles, she’s wearing pink pajamas complete with fluffy pink slippers, contrasted heavily by what is surely a contender for the best leather jacket I've ever seen.
That thing had chains coming off of its chains. It took her the better part of a minute to walk down the aisle and up to the counter, during which time my mind was racing. How did she get into the store, and how did she get this far into it without being stopped by anyone? This was not someone who would casually escape notice.
Anyway, she gets up to the counter and we converse. The whole time, she’s not speaking much louder than a soft whisper. Me: (Baffled and bewildered) Hey... Her: (After catching her breath, looks up and smiles weakly) Hey... Me: How did you get into the store? We're actually closed right now. Her: The front door was open.
We actually examined security footage the day after to see how she got in, and sure enough, the heavy automatic doors were open by about half an inch, and, despite her condition, after several laborious minutes, she had somehow found the strength needed to muscle the doors open wide enough to squeeze through. Me: I see...Well...We're still closed, so...
Her: I was told that you can still operate the cashier. (She meant register, but she said cashier.) Me: (Even more baffled and bewildered) Who told you this? Her: (Looking over towards the direction of the entrance) They said that the cashiers were locked, but that you had a card that could open it. Instinctively, I reached down to my belt for the admin control card and rested my hand on it for a moment.
Me: Yes...My card can override the system...However, all the money has already been counted from the cashier registers... Her: Oh...I see...Hm...What...What if I paid by card, that would work, right? Me: That would work, but we're...(deep inhale and exhale) closed, but I suppose, you've already come this far...Okay then, sure, let’s do this.
Her: Ah... Thank you. This is greatly appreciated. (She turns around and starts waddling off) Me: Wait. This register isn't operational yet. Once you have your items, take them to the register at the front, the one closest to the exit, I'll be there. She smiles and then nods. So she waddles off, a great deal faster than she had arrived, as if possessed of newfound purpose.
Meanwhile, I shook off some of the night’s zombification, and I slowly shuffled my way to the front of the store. After about 10 minutes, I saw her waddling into view and towards the counter. She was carrying her single item in both hands, and with great care, she reverently placed it atop the counter. When I finally got a good look at the item and my mind registered what it was, my heart almost broke in two.
It was Infant Cough Syrup. Suddenly, there was a moment of pure clarity where everything just made sense, and sure enough, after she paid for her item, thanked me once again, and left, I spoke to my co-workers who all confirmed the conclusion I'd already reached. She ran into several staff members, all of whom confronted her, but none of whom could bring themselves to turn her away once her purpose was revealed.
The night staff were the first to intercept her, all of whom apologized profusely that they couldn't help, but directed her towards their team leader who might. The team leader then directed her towards the new department where there were day staff. I asked what they would've done if it were any other night, and they said that they would've just given her the item.
Once she reached the new department, the day staff confronted her and directed them towards me, and a few even mentioned my admin card, and that she would most assuredly get served. She had tried several gas stations before she'd arrived at our retail park, desperation had brought her, and one way or another she was going to leave the retail park with what she came for.
There were a lot of people calling me a "hero" when I told this story, but later, I learned the heartbreaking truth of the whole story. I feel obliged to tell you about two people who I feel are more deserving of the title than myself. The first worthy hero was the elderly downstairs neighbor who, despite the late hour, had agreed to watch over the woman’s sleeping toddler and sick infant while she went out to get the medicine.
Even though the neighbor has now passed, I feel that that they are at least deserving of a great deal of posthumous respect. The second worthy hero is the taxi driver who had been driving her around that night. After the second visited gas station proved fruitless, they turned off the meter at its current price, and then later at the end of the night when they took her home with the medicine, they voided the entire fare and wished her infant child their absolute and sincerest best.
The first took time out of their night despite the great age and frail health, and the other took a major personal financial hit to hasten her way. These two are the ones I feel a more deserving of praise than I.
63. Adventure Time
I currently work at a mall, in a candy store close to the food court. In the food court, there is a play area for kids with different structures to climb and play on. This play area has a no-shoes policy, meaning that to play there, kids have to take their shoes off. Now, kids are attracted to candy and have been known to wander in.
We can tell that they are from the play area because they lack shoes and, usually, we have an employee walk them back. These kids are usually really young, so it scares us a bit when they do not have an adult nearby watching them. Well, today there were three kids, probably siblings, all five years old or younger, that wandered in.
We took note of their lack of shoes and asked them to show us where their parents were; a common tactic to get them to walk back to the playpen and to their adult. Well, this five-year-old was kind of sassy and said, "I am five years old. I don’t need my parents since I walked here on my own." His younger siblings agreed with him.
We then told him that he couldn’t buy anything because he did not have any money. Honestly, though, we will not sell to kids without shoes regardless of whether they have money or not. He and his siblings ran out of the store and we watched them run to the play area. We figured that they went to their parents and moved on.
15 minutes later, they were back with an unexpected vengeance. They all grabbed a bunch of stuff and tried to run out with it, but we stopped them. This time around, my manager walked back to the playpen with them. Later, when she came back, she said that when she got there, the other parents did not want to allow them back in since they had been disruptive and had pushed some of the other kids.
So, she had returned with them in tow and we had to call security to pick up the kids and make an announcement over the PA system. A security guard later said that a woman had picked the children up and was mad at them since she had told them to stay in the playpen while she shopped. Later, I told my friend, who works at one of the restaurants at the food court what had happened and she said that she had spotted them running around the backs of the restaurants.
She had to kick them out from there since it was dangerous for the kids to be there. My only question is, “Who lets their young kids alone in a busy mall while they shop?” Just get a sitter!
64. Oh, Just Put That Anywhere
I was bagging groceries last night when a lady came through with a baby in a car seat in the basket of her cart. She had a LOT of groceries that I'm assuming she'd had under and around the car seat, so when I bagged them I was putting them back under and around the car seat. I wasn't sure where else to put them if not there, right?
It's not like I could put them on top of the baby, right? Well. As I'm placing stuff carefully under Baby, Baby's mom says "oh Hon, you can just put some of this stuff on top of him" and pats the canopy. The phrase, "But ma'am that's a baby" almost escapes me but I choke it down, nod, and continue putting stuff under the baby, under the cart, in the seat of the cart, etc.
At this point, the cashier (my favorite cashier) is trying and failing not to laugh at both the absurdity of me being told to put groceries on a baby and my increasingly desperate attempts at finding places for the bags. I got all but a bag of chips squared away, and there was just no more room, so as they walked away I set the bag of chips on top of the car seat.
I then turned back to the cashier and whispered in horror, "I put the chips on the baby." Which I believe is the most absurd thing I've said on the job so far.
65. Grabbing Luck With Both Hands
Our store has a lottery kiosk. Yesterday, this lady was buying tickets and she ordered me to tell her good luck. She didn't mean to wish her luck, either. She specifically said, "You should say good luck to me when I'm getting lottery tickets." I just told her I grew up doing theatre and I was conditioned not to say good luck. This is sort of true, but I mostly do not say it because I just cannot be bothered by these people.
66. A Heavy Load
I'm a cart pusher and I don't deal with tons of customers. I did have a woman flip out and call me an idiot one, but honestly I feel this was worse. I saw these two girls, probably 17-19 years old, putting their cart up on the curb instead of a corral. I went over and said I would take it. What does one of them do? She shoves the cart so it rolls full speed, and I have to run after it while they stand there, watching me and laughing at me.
One of them said, "Haha you really did that!!" to the one who shoved the cart. I was embarrassed and felt hurt by this. It ruined my night that they decided to just make a joke out of me and my job. I am trying to feel better about it, thinking they are super immature, but this still was hurtful.
67. A Question Of Receiving
I had a woman say that she didn’t want her receipt. Then, when I threw it out, she yelled and said that I should give her a receipt. So, I went to print a new one and she immediately said, “No, I want my original receipt.” So, I pulled it out of my trash can, which only had receipt paper in it, and she goes, “It’s that one!”
I wondered, “Lady, how would you know? They’re all the same.” However, I held my tongue and just say, “No, this is for a smaller purchase. You got a bigger size.” I found hers and she huffed off. Fast forward a few days—I looked through the customer feedback box and I was shocked. We get a bad review saying that I was rude, threw out her receipt when she asked for it, and did not print her a new one.
It went on to claim that I just pulled a receipt out of the garbage and didn’t even give her the right receipt. Corporate gave her a gift card. I was done after that.
68. Petty Is As Petty Does
I worked as a bagger at a small family-owned grocery store while I was in high school. One day, a man came through the checkout with a full cart of groceries. Me: "Paper or plastic?" Customer: “I’d like double-bagged paper and I’d like you to make each bag as heavy as you can.” Me, after a significant pause and wondering if I should ask: "Sure thing!"
A bit of a strange request, sure, but anything that broke up the monotony of the day was welcomed. I managed to load his entire cart into three fairly heavy bags and bring them out to his car. Customer: "In case you're wondering—I just had a fight with the wife and it's my turn to pick up the groceries." Me: "Uh-huh." Customer: "It's also her turn to unload the car."
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69. A Valuable Lesson
Yesterday was horrible. My relief wasn't on time, and because of our nonsensical late policy, I was technically working for free after my shift ended. So, I was a little cranky when my last customer asked to "just grab one thing really quickly." I said yes, but I was admittedly huffy. The customer decided to "teach me a lesson."
They waited to grab the item until the entire order was through. I cannot void an order over $10, so that wasn't an option. And today was the first of the month, so it was busy and I couldn't afford to have my time wasted. I just wanted to scream.
70. Put A Ring On It
I work in a fine jewelry store, and this was my interaction with customers who just left. Him: “Well, we want to go get married now so we need a size 5 ring.” Me: “Unfortunately, all our rings will be stock size 7.” Him: “Well...what about that one on your hand.” Me: holds up men’s ring they had just looked at, “ this is a men’s so it’s a 10.”
Him: Points at my engagement ring “No, that.” Me: “My engagement ring? It’s a size 5.” Him: “Well, we will just take that.” Me: “It’s not for sale. It’s my engagement ring.” The woman then gets annoyed and they speak Spanish for a bit together. Him, finally: “Well this is insane, and we’ll just go somewhere else in that case.” I honestly can’t...
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71. Time For Change
What is up with the over 50 crowds being inconsiderate and generally just difficult to deal with? I had a retail customer come in at 9:30 am, right after I locked the door to go to the bank. He knocked, so of course, I opened the door and helped him. He got up to the register and paid with two $50 bills and two $1 bills for his $31.94 purchase because he wanted to break up his bills.
He then proceeded to dictate the exact denominations of change that he wanted, which I didn’t have since I hadn't gone to the bank yet. So, I flipped through the change in my cash bag. He saw the denominations that interested him, which happened to be the only change that I really had. He wanted them, but I hesitantly obliged because what else was I going to pay him with?
That was when another customer walked in and wanted to pay with—wait for it—CASH! I hate it here!!! I have also noticed that it’s always the same kind of people who do things like this. They call in two minutes before closing and ask you to stay, or show up 30 minutes before you open and bang on your doors, etc. I cannot finish my home inspection classes fast enough because I am fed up with how rude and seemingly clueless a lot of people can be in public.
72. A Mother’s Love
I work part-time in a mid-sized retail store that is pretty close to a local school, so we get a lot of school kids in around 12 buying snacks and candy and whatnot during recess. A lot of the same kids, so over time I've come to recognize a lot of them. One of the groups was quite loudly talking about dabbing, and about how fun it would be to see an employee dab while working.
I could have taken the easy route and just dabbed right there and made his day, but I didn't, and it would turn out to pay off. A few days later, the same group of kids come in, but this time with the dab-kid's mom as well. They're still talking about dabbing, and getting an employee to dab, probably hoping I overhear it. This time, I was about to do it.
But then their mom walks towards me, with the kind of mischievous grin only a mother can muster. The kid, the mom, and myself share a moment—we all know what’s about to go down. The mother and I with mischievous grins, and the kid with a mortified look on his face. "Wanna dab with me?" She plainly asks. I dab. She dabs. The kid’s friends are looking on in awe.
Dab-kid is mortified, then hangs his head in shame, as his friends start to laugh. A plan that started out as a way to get a little bit of street cred suddenly backfired, as his friends watched his mom commit the ultimate act of embarrassment. Made my day, though.
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73. An Ill-fitting Argument
I work at Zara as a sales associate. Due to COVID, our dressing rooms are closed because they would be used as a shared space and, therefore, they'd require a wipe down, among other things, every time they would be used. We just do not have the staff to do that. So even though the pandemic is starting to die down, no dressing rooms.
Our return policy is pretty standard, though, so most people do not give us any grief and just buy their items and return or exchange them the next day if they do not fit. No big deal, right? Right. So, this happened while I was walking back and forth from our dressing room, which we are using as an extra stock room, filling up the shelves.
We were in the middle of a big sale, so I was trying to hustle and get everything out there as fast as I could. I was putting knitwear on racks, humming along to the song that was playing, and just generally having a grand old time. Then, approached me. The dreaded demon. Karen. She goes, "Excuuuuuuuuse me!" And I'm immediately on guard.
I turned around and immediately all my warning sensors were going off. She looked like a total Karen. Stringy blonde hair, thin lips, years of sunburn that has ruined her skin, not wearing a mask—but has one pulled down below her chin—and a girl behind her in her late teens that looked absolutely miserable being out with her.
Before I even fully processed it, my brain just said, “Oh boy.” I turned on my customer service smile and said, "Hi! How can I help you?" She was immediately in my face, not respecting social distancing at all. She demanded to know if we had a fitting room open, saying, "I was just by your fitting rooms and I saw your sign. Do you have any fitting rooms open?"
The sign clearly said that we did not, but I started with my little spiel. I said, "No, we do not have the fitting rooms open due to COVID, but our return policy still stands, even for the sale, so—" She interrupts me by saying, "But I need a fitting room." She also stepped closer to me so I stepped back. Clearly, she had no respect for our social distancing rules.
I tried to explain again that she couldn't use the fitting room, but she wouldn't have it. "I just saw someone in there." I replied, "I know, ma'am. That was my manager; she's pricing items." That apparently was not a good enough explanation for her, and she rebutted, "So she's back there and I can't be?" I just said "Yes." She still kept trying to get close to me and I kept taking steps back.
She had me quite literally backed into a corner. She proceeded to retort, "This policy is ridiculous. I can't believe this is still instituted, it's completely absurd." She then went on this entire rant about how stupid she thought the whole situation was. Apparently, she felt that she had to explain to me how stores work.
I replied, "Well, ma'am, we are still in the middle of a pandemic, and if we were to open the fitting rooms now, then we wouldn't have the staff to keep them clean and also run the store." She rolled her eyes and just started talking about how stupid and ridiculous it was that we couldn't accommodate her. At that point, I had enough.
I try to get her to stop attacking me for things I cannot control by putting it in perspective, "Ma'am, I'm just a sales associate and this policy comes from corporate. There's really nothing that I can do about this." This apparently enrages her, and she starts demanding that I change the policy right that second and get in touch with corporate to change the policy just for her.
At that moment, I had a divine moment of self-reflection. My third eye opened and I realized that throughout the whole conversation, I had been looking down. I am 5'3" (162 cm), so I don't get to look down at people very often. In arguments, I always feel stupid because I'm yelling up at whoever I am arguing with.
I am clearly not tall, but at that moment, I felt like an Amazonian goddess. I realized that I did not need to fear the Karen because the Karen would never have the dignity of talking down to me in an argument. She was still ranting and raving at this point, talking about how I needed to be the one who instituted the change because it's my job in danger.
I looked at her, gave her my best sales smile, and said, "Zara is an internationally successful company, ma'am. I am pretty confident in my job. You have a nice day, now." And I gave the polite gesture of "Get out of my way." She stormed off, and the daughter, who had been silent and miserable the entire time, whispered, "I am so sorry," and hurries after her mom.
I went to the fitting room and complained to my manager, who made a few choice comments about the Karens who don't take the pandemic seriously. I love that lady, truly. Also, when I got home, I searched for Zara's net worth out of curiosity. Seeing the results, I was relieved. Not worried about my job, not even a little bit.
74. Your Lucky Day
I was the customer in line at the checkout, and the cashier was ringing me out when a family (a mom, dad, and a ~7-year-old boy) pulled up behind me. The dad immediately wandered away while the mom started loading her groceries on the conveyer belt. After she loaded a few things, she turned to the boy and said, "You were really good today, would you like to pick out a chocolate?"
The boy got super happy, grabbed a kinder egg, and put it on the conveyer belt. Mom then tells him, "Don't tell your dad." Dad comes back and mom says she forgot something, so dad continues loading the belt while mom walks away. Dad then turns to his son and says, "You were really good today, would you like to pick out a chocolate?"
I have never in my life seen a kid look so happy. He picks another kinder egg and puts it on the belt. Sure enough, dad then says, "Don't tell your mom" I didn't say anything to ruin this kid’s wonderful two-chocolate day, but I had a good chuckle walking out of there.
75. Brand New
I work at a clothing store and our policy is that if the item has been worn, you cannot return or exchange it. So, this guy came in the other day and I was already getting a weird vibe. He was shuffling around and messing up all our displays, just muttering to himself. At that point, I was only walking through the children's department to get to our break room.
But he stopped me to ask a question. He pulled out this filthy pair of children's shoes—absolutely caked in mud—and demanded an exchange. He said, "The shoes have no sole." I took a look inside the shoe, and within seconds I could tell that the shoes had been worn for a long time already. There was absolutely no mistaking it.
In fact, they had been worn so much that the sole had been worn down completely. As in, there were still little chunks of sole at the edges, but they were completely gone at the center. So, I said, "Sir, unfortunately, due to store policy, we cannot return or exchange items that have already been worn." And he replied, "These have never been worn. I need an exchange. I just bought these the other day."
So, I looked around the kid's section for just a minute and I could see that the shoes weren't even out. I tried to explain that to him, but he adamantly kept saying, "No, I bought this the other day. They have never been worn. I need a return." I kept trying to explain to him that he could not return the shoes since they were caked in mud and worn out.
What he said next really flustered me. "I have been coming here for three years. I know the girl downstairs, and I need this return." I obviously caught him in a lie, but he was not backing off. Fortunately, a lovely coworker of mine walked over and said, "Go take your break, honey. I got this." After my break, I was walking down to my section of the floor and I could see the two of them, in the exact same spot, still arguing.
I heard him go, "This is downtown New York and I cannot even make a return? This is ridiculous. Just get me the girl downstairs." When my co-worker asked for a name, and he could not give one. I could tell she was getting annoyed and a few seconds later, she met up with me on our escalator and we both just rolled our eyes.
76. Just The Ticket
So this happened a long time ago in my old job at a jewelry store. I was working on the shop floor and an elderly gentleman and his daughter came in and started looking at the bracelets and bangles. To give some perspective, this isn’t a prestige jeweler; unless something had a diamond in it, the most you could look to spend was about $400.
After giving them a few minutes to look, I went over and asked if they need any help. The gentleman said he was looking for a bangle for his wife for their anniversary but he wasn’t sure what to go for. I brought them over to the table and chairs and let him have a sit while I took 10 or so bangles and bracelets out of the display for him to have a look at. I brought them over and explained the difference between the metals, the clasps, etc.
I let him hold them, try them on his daughter to see how they looked on the wrist, that sort of thing. I probably spent about 40 minutes with them helping them choose something. He landed on something he liked and left happy with a new bangle for his wife. Such a nice man and it was a pleasure to see him off with something he liked.
Skip to the following Saturday, and I was on the shop floor again. A lady comes in looking around for something so I head over and ask if she needs anything. She clocks my name badge and says, “Ah, are you the person that helped my husband pick out this bangle?” It was the wife of the gentleman I helped, and she had come into town to find me especially to say thank you for “spending so much time with him to pick out such a lovely present” and how much she loved it.
Apparently, it had meant so much to the old-timer that he told her all about the experience in store. He had no idea really what he was looking for and I was just pleased to help guide him through the minefield that can be women’s jewelry! I’d never had such warm fuzzies working in that shop and still, I think about it a lot.
77. Fishing For Trouble
I work at an aquatics store and I manage the freshwater aquariums. Whenever I work at the store, I usually ask people about their fish tanks to help them figure out any problems the tanks may have or recommend the best fish for them. Most of the time, I can help them prevent any beginner mistakes, or just stop their fish from expiring.
A few days ago, a lady came in a few minutes before closing. I was already behind on closing because of other customers, so I was kind of tired. This lady brought in dead fish and a water sample. The parameters looked good, but as a hobbyist myself, I suspected ammonia poisoning for her fish. We did not test for ammonia though.
Furthermore, this lady had done a full water change before her fish kicked it. So, I went through the usual—I explained the proper way to do a water change (25% every week) and also recommend products. She wanted a quick fix despite me explaining that her cycle was a mess and that there was no way that her fish would survive unless she started her cycle all over again.
Such is a process that can take weeks sometimes. Instead of listening, she made up an excuse about how she really needed to take some fish home because her kids want them. I still tried to guide her to a sensible decision. I recommended that she take only two fish so as to not shock the new cycle too much. All went well until she realized something that I had overlooked myself—the fish sale would end in a few days.
Then she insists that she absolutely must take the other fish too. I mentally say, “Alright. Fine. Take your fish.” Out loud I remind her that there is a good chance her fish are going to lose their lives unless she is very careful with her cycle. I, finally, send her on her way thirty minutes after closing because she would not listen to any advice that I gave her.
This was despite asking me what she could do and then not wanting to do it because she thought that it was too much work or she did not have time. I explained it later to the manager and she said that if she came back to return those same fish, I was to deny her the sale.
78. If It Ain’t Broke
I have removed myself from the retail game about six months ago, but I still think fondly of this one...I was the manager of the returns and exchanges area of a smaller computer and electronics chain, and I was called over to the returns area by one of our associates. I approached and saw a young college-age girl with a MacBook that had an obviously cracked screen.
Looking at the receipt, it was less than a day old. I asked her what happened, and she admitted to dropping it as soon as she took it out of the box, and that she didn't get any warranties to cover the damage because she was a broke college kid. She asked me if there was anything I could do for her at this point with it.
I told her that I was going to walk away and come back in a minute, and when I did she should tell me it was broken as soon as she took it out of the box. I came back, she told me that, and we swapped it out for a new one for no charge. The best part was this young lady came back in about two days later with a tray full of the most delicious brownies and kept saying how much she appreciated everything we did for her.
79. A Calculated Move
In one of my old jobs, I worked in a coffee shop. I really enjoyed it and the people who came in regularly were a dream. One time, the till had broken down, and we resorted to a pen-and-paper process to take people's orders. We also worked out their change correctly by punching it into the calculator. Everything was going well.
Or, it was going well..until this absolute demon of a customer came in. She started rattling off her order. I was hurriedly writing it down and double-checking the prices on the menu. She saw what I was doing and she tutted me as if she was disappointed. She also had the audacity to tap on the broken till and say, "Why aren't you using this? Surely it's easier?"
I pointed to the sign next to them and said as nicely as possible that we were using pen and paper, etc. Then, rolling her eyes, she said her order slowly but with a condescending tone. After taking her order, I took my time repeating it back to her, since she had asked for a lot. Apparently, that was too much for them.
She responded by saying, "I am in a hurry and you are taking too long." I apologized and explained that I simply wished to make sure that the order was correct. Then I proceeded to total up her order with the calculator, and I heard her sighing and huffing as I was typing away the figures. She said, "Why do you need a calculator? Clearly, someone did not finish math, or else you would not be working here."
That was the final straw. I balled up the piece of paper, threw it in the bin next to me, and said, "Another member of staff will be with you to help you shortly." I made my way to the staff area and told my manager what had happened. They told me to relax and said that they would sort it. Needless to say, I watched as my manager went out and made it very clear that the customer’s business was not welcome.
I just wish that I had the sense to throw that balled-up piece of paper in her face. I hate people like that.
80. The Waiting Game
I work for a car rental place. I am the only employee at a location in a very small town, and I often have to leave the store to go pick up customers, pick up/drop off oil changes, etc. etc. When I do, I leave between reservations, lock-up, and put up a sign on the door with a number where customers can reach me immediately if they need to.
I usually never get any calls. However, yesterday a woman called while I was out dropping off a customer to a body shop. She seemed perfectly reasonable…at first. Me: Thanks for calling. How can I help you? Her: Hi. (Apparently having read my notice) Will you be back soon? I don't have much time. For the record, she had no reservation and had not previously contacted the store.
Me: Yes ma'am. Just dropping off a customer. It should be about 5 to 10 minutes. Her: I'll be waiting . . . then she hangs up. Literally two minutes later, she calls back. Her: Sir, I just can't let you do this. Me: Do what? Her: You abandoned the store and I am going to call the authorities if you don't show up soon. Me: *laughing from confusion*
Me: That won't be necessary ma'am. I'll be back very soon and officers aren’t…She hangs up again. I show up four minutes later and swear to god, THE OFFICERS WERE WAITING WITH HER, visibly unsure about why they were there. If you’re counting, she waited a total of six minutes MAX after I knew she existed, which is shorter than I've waited for fresh nuggets in a drive-thru.
She had no reservation, and with not having previously contacted a business that operates based on reservations, she literally called the authorities. Officer: What's the problem here? Me: I have no idea. You'll have to ask her. The officers, having already talked to her, look at us and back at each other, then back at me. They say: We hope you have a better day.
She doesn't even try to come in. Maybe she realized she had just gone through a manic episode and decided to give herself some time.
81. Delivering It In Style
I work at a shipping store. One day, I was asked to ship something to Iraq to who I assume was a military husband. Well, as a typical Karen, she gave lip and was upset about price and other small things. After a long process, we got the $20 of junk shipped. A few weeks later, she returned to the store, upset. She demanded to see my boss.
She began to chew him out about how I sent the package to the wrong place and how we charged her too much. Her problem was that she wanted to send it to a military base, which should have astronomically reduced the price. My boss took one look at her, and shut her up with a single sentence: "Ma’am, how does my employee know a random street address in Iraq unless you told him to send it there?"
Karen was dumbfounded and, after a few moments of being flabbergasted, she rambled back that she would call the local news. She never did that or the other things that she threatened to do. She didn't even write a bad message on Google.
82. A First Time For Everything
This is the most exciting story I've got. This was back before the proliferation of smartphones, etc. It's about the time I worked at a gas station/convenience store for one whole day and ended up as a Manager and a District Manager's worst nightmare. I'd taken the job not two days before and was told to show up at 7 am on a Monday for training.
No big deal, right? The manager certainly seemed stable enough at the time, but I suppose that's what they say about all the crazies. So. I show up at 7 am, bright-eyed and bushy-tailed and ready to get to work. I'm immediately introduced to the young lady who's been tasked with training me by the manager. The manager spends the first 20 minutes of my shift not training me, but ranting and rambling about how she just worked a double graveyard and how she's bushed, and how this place just sucks her dry...you get the idea.
Then she reiterates that the girl’s going to be with me all day, training me step by step, and is then gone in a puff of smoke. Gone home to get some much-deserved sleep. She leaves her home number on a scrap of paper behind the counter "In Case Of Emergencies Only." Sensible enough. So we get down to business. The girl is shocked that I'm already somewhat register- and computer-literate, and so takes the opportunity to abandon me in the backroom doing a few hours of computer training that I gather is supposed to encompass the entirety of my day.
When I finish my computer training, I step out into the main store area to be relieved of duty. The girl instead informs me that we're now going to do some hands-on training. ...Weird... but fine...I guess...I mean, I'm not going to scoff at a few extra hours on my paycheck, so whatever. Let's do some hands-on work then.
The hands-on work goes on for about an hour and a half, bringing my day to about four and a half hours at this point, until the girl pulls me aside and announces, with a beaming grin on her face, “You know what? I think, yeah. I think screw this place. Me: Screw this place? Her: Yeah man, screw it. Screw everything. I quit.
Me: Like in two weeks? Her: Like, I mean, like now. Me: ...what? With that, she tears off her smock and walks out of the joint, leaving me to mind the store alone. I don't know how to do cash drops, I don't know how to do most of this stuff. I've been here for four hours tops. You must be kidding me. She locks the door to the backroom, shoves the key underneath the door, and is gone forever.
So, like the nice young man I am, I call the manager’s emergency number. The phone rings and rings and rings for maybe two minutes straight before she finally answers, mid-snore, with a befuddled “...whuzzah?” I promptly explain the situation to her and tell her that I need help. She tells me to hold tight, and that she's going to call her Assistant Manager to come and help. You know where this is going.
The assistant never comes. I'm waiting for another two hours, and they never show up. I call the manager back. Same deal. Two minutes of continuous ringing. She promises something else. Hangs up on me. We go through this process four more times over the course of two more hours, when the next person on-shift is due to show up anyway.
He never shows. Naturally. So I call the manager until she finally just takes her phone off the hook so I can't call her anymore. This is the part of the story where I start to freak out. I have no other numbers. I know no one else who works here. I am alone. No way to clock out, no way to hide, no way to lock the doors, nothing. Just work. Only work.
Forever and ever and ever and ever. I can see that this is how I go, I'm sure of it. I'm in a really boring version of Final Destination. At this point, I feel the need to call out the dudes who ran the tattoo shop across the street. They'd been coming in for cokes and energy drinks and such throughout the day, and had taken a keen interest in my well-being.
They were pretty "up" on the situation, and kept me reasonably calm throughout the day. They noticed that I was starting to freak out, asked me what the situation was, and I explained. Just like that, these guys jump into action. They bring me their phonebook with all the numbers of the other stores in the area circled, and they go to the local taco cart and get me a plate of tacos and a coke "to keep my strength up."
I'm not into dudes, but I considered asking these guys to marry me right then and there. Fueled by tacos and sheer, unadulterated panic, I start making calls. Other stores are shocked by what's happened but don't have anyone to spare. They've got no one. But. One of them gives me the district manager's home number. Bingo.
I explained the situation to him and listened as he went from perfectly congenial to absolutely terrified. He tells me, “I'm coming down there to personally relieve you from your shift...” But then he says the perfect combination of words to set me off: “...but I'm going to need about an hour and a half. Is that okay?”
Welcome to my breaking point. I begin to shout and shout and shout. Me: No, that is not alright. Tell you what—either you get down here in half an hour, or I am going to open the cash registers, the safe, turn the gas pumps on unlimited run, and go home. Is that what you want?? FREE GAS AND FREE MONEY FOR EVERYONE WHO COMES INTO THE STORE UNTIL THERE'S NO MORE MONEY! IS THAT WHAT YOU WANT?!
Him:: ...I'll be there in 20 minutes. I now see what has happened: I am now the crazy person in the situation. I'm the movie bad guy. I'm the one making demands. But you know what? He got there in 15 minutes flat. And you know what? He was very nice, all said and told. He apologized profusely, even helped me kick in the locked backroom door so I could clock out all proper-like.
It's 10:30 pm. Finally. But then the manager, in her pajamas, eyes bloodshot and wild, comes storming into the store, screaming at the district manager, who had apparently gotten her to answer her phone during his trip over. She’s screaming at him, “How dare you tell me how to run my store, I swear you've been telling me what to do for too long now and I am telling you for the last time—“
The district manager turns to me as she is shrieking, and he says something that makes me start laughing like a psychotic. “Go home. I've got this.” Well, you don't have to tell me twice, amigo. I'm gone. When I get to the door, finally, he calls after me and says, “I really hope this doesn't affect your future with the company.” I never went back.
83. A Steep Price
A man came in today to exchange a pair of pants. Unfortunately for him, he had bought a $70 pair and a $60 pair on a BOGO 50% sale, so the $60 pair was 50% off. He wanted to exchange the $70 pair for another $60 pair, but the system pairs up items when they're in a BOGO offer. On the receipt, it would've looked like he was returning both pairs and repurchasing the one he wasn't returning, in order to remove the BOGO offer.
After exchanging, he would have had to pay $11 since the BOGO offer was no longer available. He was not happy, as he would have had to pay even though he was returning a more expensive pair. I did him a solid and threw in 25% off. He would've gotten around $5 back, but he still was not happy with the offer. At that point, I knew he was going to be difficult.
He asked to speak to the manager, and as the shift leader, that was me. He wanted more of a discount, but I couldn't reasonably give it to him. He kept getting angry, so I told him to come back tomorrow, and maybe the store manager then would reach a different decision. He agreed and finally left after holding up the line for a little over five minutes.
Well, he never asked me to keep the pants on hold for him. It was our last pair, too, so I put them on my manager's desk, called her, and asked her for a favor. If he comes in tomorrow, she's going to tell him that we don't have them anymore. I also called my girlfriend—my manager's daughter—who works at the closest store to us and asked her to hide their only pair in the back room.
The closest available pair in that guy's size is now two cities over. He kept asking for more and now he will get nothing. It's not much, but it's a victory.
84. Baring It All
I work at a clothing store, and we have packs of underwear hanging on a wall near the front of the store. The wall is split into two sections: The bottom is single pairs of underwear that go for $2, and then there are packs of eight that cost $20. They are not the same brand, they are different materials, they look different, and are on different parts of the wall.
On the part of the wall that only contains single pairs, there is a sign that says "5 for $5.” A woman walks up to our register with five eight-packs of underwear, and I make casual conversation before presenting her with her total. Me: That will be ~$100.00. Her: No, that will be $5.00. Me:...Well, no, that'll be ~$100.00. Her: No! They're five for five, it says so on the sign!
At this point, I know what sign she saw, and I know what mistake she's making, but in an attempt to show her the error of her ways I ask her to show me the sign. Her: Look, there it is right there, it's 5 for $5. Me: Actually, the 5 for $5 is referencing these single pairs that are only $2. Her face lit up with anger and disgust as if I had pooped on the floor and asked her to clean it up with her tongue.
Her: Well, why is that sign there?! Why are those packs with these packs?! These packs are on this wall and that sign says it's 5 or $5 and I'll take them at that price. Me: Usually I could adjust your price, but I can't sell you $100 of merchandise at $5. Her: Well, you need to remove that sign then because that's false advertising. Me: No.
Her: No?! Me: Yup, no. At this point, my heart was in my throat and I actually could have gotten in trouble for how I spoke to her, depending on which manager she spoke to, but instead, she just kind of walked out of the store. Even if the sign was ambiguous, assuming a sale of that magnitude is just silly. Like, use your brain.
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85. No Matter How You Slice It
I had this one customer one day ask me, "It's 50% off for bag mulch if it has got holes in it, right?" I told him that it was up to the cashier and how big the holes were. He said OK. My sketchiness radar went off, so I went to tell one of my coworkers to keep an eye on him. After a little while, the guy came back with four bags of soil. Each one had a huge slash on top.
They were clean slashes too and not holes from rough handling. He said, “50% each, right?” I had a small line, so I went ahead and rang them up (each bag was like, $4 originally). After I gave him his receipt, he said that he would like me to tape the holes shut. Again, I had a line and explained to him that I could only do that once the line is gone.
That's when he blew his top. He started making a scene, so I told the person behind him that I just needed a few minutes. It took me five minutes and a complaint from another customer for me to get them taped and sealed to his standards. A few days later, I was outside with a new coworker and he asked her, "Do you give a discount on rocks?"
I told her that it would depend on how bad the situation is. At first, I did not recognize him as the same guy—I thought that he said rakes, not rocks. So, he showed up with a few bags totaling roughly $90. He was demanding half off on each, so the coworker asked me what to do. We were only allowed a $50 markdown without any assistance. When I look at his bags, I almost lost it.
Once again, there were clean cuts. I told him that they were just open and none were missing, so we couldn't do the full 50% off. Instead, I helped my coworker take $20 off. He did not like that and kept demanding we give him 50% off, saying that someone ruined his bags. I told my coworker to just mark them down so he could finally leave and we could get our lines moving.
86. Dream Job
So I work in a store where we use short-range radios with headsets to communicate with each other. It's a huge help to us and helps us be more efficient. Earlier today, my boss sends me next door to the grocery store to buy donuts for the crew. While I'm waiting in line, a young boy (maybe 7-8) is shooting daggers at me.
I'm wearing my sunglasses inside with my earpiece still in as well. As I'm leaving he yells to grab my attention. Here's the conversation we had: Little Kid: Hey! Me: Uhh, yeah? Kid: What’s that for? (pointing to my earpiece). By now I know where this is going. Me: (I cross my arms) I use it for work. Kid: Come here, I have another question.
The mom looks at me with an eye roll because her kid is eccentric and that seems to annoy her. Not me, weird kids always give me a laugh. I bend down to his level to hear, then he whispers: Kid: Do you work for the government? Me: (I put my finger over my earpiece) Eagle this is condor! Cover blown! I repeat eagle, our cover is blown!
Then I take me and my donuts and run out of the store as fast as possible while the mom is dying of laughter and the kid’s jaw is on the ground because he just met a secret agent. The highlight of my day.
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87. Schadenfreude
I work in the produce section at a Trader Joe's clone. It's a hyper-corrupt corporate structure, but for once, I can't blame what happened yesterday on corporate. Here's what went down. So, yesterday, I was nearing the end of my shift and was bringing a few dozen plastic packages of cut fruit out to our cut fruit fridge. At the time I was exhausted.
I didn't think about how I was balancing these packages on my work truck, and they all fell onto the floor—berries and grapes were just flying everywhere. Obviously, this was not a big deal, but this happened right in the center of the store, where our four departments and the doors to the back room converged. The store was also well over capacity with customers doing their Saturday afternoon shopping.
This incident had created a traffic jam of sorts. My manager and I were scrambling to pick everything up, and I was down on my knees trying to pick up the grapes. What infuriated me were the glib jokes and quips that customers felt they needed to make and the fact that even though there was plenty of space for them to get around us, they still grazed their carts within an inch or two of where I was squatting.
I was embarrassed enough, but it just got worse for me. I started hyperventilating and got tunnel vision, and had a panic attack. Even if, from an outsider's perspective, the situation was somewhat comedic, from my perspective, it was exceedingly humiliating and dehumanizing, to be treated as an object. Customers were weaving around me like I didn't exist and provided unnecessary commentary that nobody else cared to hear.
It was the most embarrassed that I've ever been at this job. In my state, the customers seemed like cackling buzzards swooping around, narrowing in on the prey. We, somehow, managed to clear up the path and get out of the way of the buzzards.
88. Driving Me Crazy
This literally just happened. I work at a higher-end clothing store and I tend not to get too many out-there customers, but this guy took the cake. A man came in with about three small children, shopped around for about a half hour while running me completely ragged in the process, and then went to pay for his items. He has a store credit card with us, but he didn't have it on him.
I said, "No problem, I can look it up with your driver’s license or a state ID." "Oh, I don't drive. Here, I'll show you my passport." "Sir, our computer does not scan passports as a valid form of ID. The scanner only responds to driver’s licenses or state IDs." "But a passport is a better form of ID than a driver’s license. This is Uncle Sam right here!"
"I understand, but our computer system only scans driver’s licenses or state IDs." "But a passport is a government-issued ID!" "Yes, but our computer physically cannot scan a passport. I can only scan a driver’s license or a state-issued ID." "Well, I'll just take my business elsewhere then!" He proceeded to storm out of the store, and honestly, I was a little bit relieved, until about five minutes later he comes barging back into the store.
"Here, I found my ID, now please look up my credit card!" I swear to God, he pulls out his passport. "Sir, I cannot accept this as an f-" "Scan it! This is my ID! You are discriminating against people who don't drive!" "Would you like me to call customer service and see if there is anything they can do for you?” "No, I don't want you to call customer service. I want you to scan my ID and look up my credit card!"
At this point, my manager sees the commotion going on, comes over to help me out, and tells this guy exactly what I've been repeating to him for the last 10 minutes. We apologize to him for the inconvenience, and even offer him a coupon, but he just keeps yelling and ranting and raving. Finally, he takes his kids, swears he will never shop with us again, is reporting us for "discrimination," and storms out of the store for a second time...Then gets into a car and drives away.
89. Discounting It
A doctor came into the store a few days ago with a bag of clothes. She asked if we had discounts for health care workers, to which we said that we did not. The discounts were only for military personnel and teachers or students. Immediately after hearing this, she got upset and said that doctors worked much harder and deserved it more than teachers.
In my eyes, it was rude and ignorant to expect that a well-paid doctor should get a discount over teachers who are severely underpaid. If she could come to our store and blow $300 on clothes and also have other shopping bags on her, I seriously doubt she needed a discount. But it only got worse. She had the audacity to say, "Well, who was working hard during the pandemic? Yeah, doctors! That’s right."
It's true in some ways, but she was also very well paid. Teachers, on the other hand, do so much to teach the younger generation, including future doctors, but they are not paid nearly enough, which is why they often get discounts. It just blew my mind how she sat there bashing teachers for getting a discount as if it was something the employees decided on.
90. Crystal Clear
Lots of women wear bras. I'd say a majority of women wear them to support their breasts to look and feel nice. There's a small minority who also seem to view their bras as magical extra pockets in which they can store money, their license, their credit cards, and their crystals. Betty Bra comes into the store on a fairly regular basis, usually to complain about how overpriced everything is.
She does this while pointedly mentioning the store owner by name and archly looking at me as though she expects me to fall to my knees and beg for the opportunity to give her a discount because she knows the owner. You and a million others, honey. The store owner freaks out if I give a refund one day after the 14-day return policy, so no dice on discounts from me.
Anyway, today she was complaining about the price of our crystal selection. You know the kind, you could buy a handful of them for two bucks at those "Natural Wonder" stores in big malls back in the 90s. Our store selection is a little more varied and popular among people who think carrying them around will make them rich, attract their soul mate, get them a job, or keep evil energy away from them.
Some of these people may possibly be crows in disguise. I don't put anything past customers these days. So this customer is walking around the tables with the selection of crystals in their various boxes and complaining. Her: "Why does STORE OWNER price these so high? I can buy the same ones cheaper at Another New Age Store!"
Me: "No idea, ma'am. I have nothing to do with the purchasing or pricing." And thinking, of course, why don't you just go to Another New Age Store and buy them there? Her: "And why would this rose quartz be so much more expensive than this one??" Me: "One is a small, tumbled crystal and the other is a larger, natural crystal.”
Her: "IT'S THE SAME TYPE OF STONE, UGH." She puts them down and stomps up to the counter with a Look in her eye. I smile blandly. She plants her hands on the counter and leans over to regard me closely. Her: "So you know a lot about crystals, huh?" Me: "...yes." As long as it has nothing to do with their energies, I know enough.
Everything else, I Google. She is satisfied with the answer, straightens up, and reaches down the front of her shirt, and begins fumbling around in her bra. I say nothing. She is a larger woman, so this act is taking a lot of uncomfortable contorting and grunting and flesh jiggling, and I suddenly decide I need to check the store's email.
Oh, look. A sale on plates that energize food. She finally clears her throat and I reluctantly note that she is holding her hand out to me, fingers extended, palm open. In the center of her palm are several tumbled crystals. Her palm, fingers, and the crystals are suspiciously moist. Her: "I bought these at Another New Age Store last week." I nod.
Her: "But they're not giving off any energy." Me: "It's only been a week. Sometimes it takes time for the vibrations from you and the crystals to get used to each other." (Note: I am making it up as I go along.) She looks thoughtful but keeps her hand out. My own hands are firmly on the computer keyboard. Her: "Maybe. But I'd appreciate it if you tried them out. STORE OWNER wouldn't have hired you if you weren't sensitive to energy."
The store owner hired me because I lied my butt off about my metaphysical and otherworldly experiences, because I know my way around computers and programs and graphic design and the other employees have an average typing speed 20 WPM combined, and because I'm a chump for applying for this job in the first place.
But in any case, she wants me to touch her breast crystals. Her damp, breast crystals. Not just TOUCH them, but feel their energy. I promptly balk. Me: "I'm afraid I can't." She looks offended: "Why not?" Oh, so many reasons, chief among them the breast sweat still glistening on the crystals beneath the fluorescent lights. Me: "I'm not comfortable touching another person's...crystals. Especially when they've been so close to you. The uh...energy, you see. It'll mess up my own."
She stares blankly at me for a moment, then her eyes widen. Her: "Oh. OH. Oh my goodness, you're an empath, aren't you? I completely understand! I'm one too, and I can't stand eating out because of all the collected energies in the silverware, it really gives me indigestion. Especially at the Olive Garden, since it's right by the senior home? All the energy of those old folks can really mess up your system."
I nod understandingly. Whatever it takes to not touch sweaty breast crystals. She shoves the crystals back into her bra like someone stuffing a turkey for Thanksgiving. Her hand, wrist, and most of her forearm vanishes down the front of her shirt until only her elbow is visible. The contortions and grunting resume, and once more I find myself completely absorbed in reading about the benefits of charging an apple with positive energy from a crystal plate.
Ions are mentioned a lot. Some higher Retail Power was with me, because the customer, per her complaining about the prices, wasn't interested in buying anything, and left without touching anything with her moistened fingers. But just to be on the safe side, I took the Lysol and spent a good half hour wiping down everything she had potentially touched.
You just never know when someone has been feeling up their breast crystals before going shopping.
91. Holier Than Thou
The main guy of this Pentecostal church group comes into our store every Sunday and Wednesday. He told one of our servers that she was going to suffer and that she couldn’t serve him because she has tattoos on her arms. He would never wear a mask even at the height of the pandemic. He'd constantly complain about the service and how no one at my restaurant was a good server. But that's not the worse thing he's done.
He also told one of our servers that he was going to call CPS on her because her kids shouldn’t have a mom who has tattoos and piercings. I would love to knock the religious superiority right out of his body through a punch right to the ear.
92. These Boots Were Made For Whining
I come bearing a tale that is one of the most ridiculous customer encounters I've had in my almost 17 years of retail experience. Buckle up, kids. It's gonna be a wild ride. Relevant to the story: We are unable to take orders over the phone. Credit cards must be physically swiped/inserted at the register and we have absolutely no way around this.
The setting: a shoe store. Just a few days ago, I had just clocked in for my closing shift. The phone rings. Me: "Good afternoon, thank you for calling ShoeStore, how may I help you?" There’s a very elderly woman at the end of the line. "Oh hi. I was in your store earlier today looking at a pair of shoes, and I'm just kicking myself for not buying them. I'd like for you to ship them to me."
Me: "Unfortunately, we are unable to take orders over the phone, but I'd be glad to put them on hold for you.” Her: "But I live so far away and I can't make the trip alllll the way out there again!" Me: "Uh...I'm sorry about that, but I have no way of taking payment over the phone." Her: "Can I order them online?" Me: "Possibly, which shoe were you looking at?"
Her: "I don't know." A little back and forth ensues, with her attempting to explain what the shoe looked like and where it was located in the store. I'm somehow able to find it. It's a single pair of sandals from last year that are on super mega clearance because, well, they're old. Me: "Unfortunately, you won't find these on our website, they're from last year."
Her: "Well, what am I supposed to doooooo??!!" Me: go back in time and buy them when you were here? "I'm not sure, ma'am." Her: "OH! You can ship them to me, and when I get them I'll mail you a check!" Me: "Sorry ma'am, I can't send out merchandise that has not been paid for." Her, getting increasingly frustrated: "Is there anyone else there I can talk to? A manager?"
Me, trying to suppress laughter as my manager is staring at me, shaking his head at hearing my side of the conversation: "No, I'm the only manager here right now." Her: "Well then, you can buy it for me and I'll mail you a check." Me: "Excuse me?" Her: "They're not even $20. You pay for it and I'll send you a personal check. I'm good for it."
Me: "I'm not going to do that." Her: "Well, is there anyone else there who would?" Me: "No ma'am, no one here is going to buy your shoes for you." staring from my manager intensifies, we both exchange the “I can't wait to talk about this one” look Her: "Well, I mean this is ridiculous. All I want is those shoes and no one will help me. So there's nothing you can do?"
Me: "No ma'am, I'm afraid there isn't." Her: "Well then THANKS A LOT." I burst out laughing and regale my manager with the full conversation. A nearby customer overhears and also starts laughing. I spend most of my remaining shift hiding in the back room, I feel like I earned it.
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93. Rules Are For Others
My store is currently closed for in-store shopping and we don’t have a proper click-and-collect set up yet. The system we have basically sends us an email, then we call the customer to confirm. Well, someone called about 30 minutes to close on Saturday and I squeezed her order in at the last minute.
She yelled, "Ugh, whatever," and hung up on my manager. We got back to her within an hour and placed her order. When she came to pick up both on Saturday, she disregarded all our COVID policy signs saying to call the store for pick-ups. Instead, she climbed over the barriers to knock on the store’s door. I was on the phone with a customer when she did this, and my coworker was completely out of sight.
. When she did it again today, I gestured for her to call us. She called, and then when I collected her order and opened the door, she laid into me about how rude I was being. I countered, "I think it was rather rude of you to ignore all our signs and barriers and knock on the door." She got very upset and yelled at me about how she was never coming back. "You'll be lucky to have a job tomorrow," she threatened.
94. Closed Is Closed
I'm only 16 but work at a local pharmacy and gift shop in my town. The customers are generally pretty chill, older folks. Yesterday was a special exception. We close at 3 on Sundays, and around 2:58 I stand by the door waiting for the "all clear" to lock the door. There's still a man in the back having trouble filling his prescription, but it’s all good because he's apologetic, realizing it's nearing closing.
Well, 3:00 rolls around and my boss gives me the thumbs up. Usually, if there's someone like the guy in the back, I just wait for him to finish up and unlock the door for him, and that was my plan today. But, as I lock the door, a car comes speeding into the parking lot, and parks right out front. Seeing as we have closed, I know I'm gonna have to tell this already angry-looking old lady that she's gonna have to wait till tomorrow.
I unlock the door and poke my head out. Me: I'm sorry ma'am, but we just closed, if there's something in particular you're looking for it’s possible they have it over in (neighboring supermarket). Her: What the heck do you mean you're closed? It's 3 O’clock in the afternoon! Me: Yes ma'am, we close at 3 on Sundays, I'm sorry for the inconvenience.
Her: Can't you let me in to get my prescription really quick? At this point, I can tell it's not gonna be good. Me: Ma'am, I'm sorry but we have closed and are no longer allowed to process prescriptions. You're going to have to wait until tomorrow. Her: What about the man who's in there now? You don't seem to have a problem with him. Let me in!
Me: He walked into the store around 2:45 and we are having trouble processing his prescription. As soon as he's done he will be leaving as well. Her: it's only 3:05! Let me in! Me: Closed is closed, ma'am, I'm sorry. At this point I close the door and relock it, waiting for the man in the back to finish up. She begins pounding on the door, ordering to see my boss.
Luckily, he and the man just finished up, and they both walk up to the front door. As I unlock it for the man, this woman tries to FORCE HERSELF IN to get her prescription. At this point, my boss steps in. Him: Miss, I'm sorry but we are closed now. You'll have to come back tomorrow for your prescription. Her: What the heck is wrong with you people, you're denying me my medication! I need it!
Boss: How many doses do you have left? Her: Enough to last through Tuesday but I— Boss: Great, see you Tuesday. He closes the door in her face, which prompts more shouting. As we leave and lock up the door, she continues screaming at us until we all drive off. She was back today and got her prescription, somehow she survived through the night.
95. Half-baked Notion
I work in a bakery in a grocery store, and we have plexiglass in front of us and in front of our artisan bread for obvious reasons...Or maybe, not-so-obvious reasons to some people. Today, I had a lady reach over the glass, over my case full of cakes, to grab the cake from the top of my pile. She had to struggle to reach it.
Not only that, but all throughout COVID, we had to put all our bread in bags instead of leaving them out in the open. The glass is literally two feet tall. All I could think was, “If you have to struggle to reach over the glass, it probably means you are not supposed to be doing the thing you are doing!” This phenomenon has actually been happening even more since COVID and I'm really just over it.
96. The Writing On The Wall
In college, I worked for a floral shop that shared a space with a bakery. We had the space for both businesses to operate and it naturally was a good partnership. This story takes place near the end of my senior year. I was six weeks shy of graduating with two degrees. Although I cared about the stores and wanted them to do well, my nonsense-tolerance had dropped significantly.
One day, a woman came to me for balloons for her son's 2nd birthday party. She had already picked up her cake. Woman (grumpily tossing her balloon choices at me): Ugh, I can't believe the bakery. Me: Oh, is there something wrong? Woman: Yes! LOOK at this cake! She opens the box. It's a nice-looking cake, decorated with icing and trains.
A scrolling script says: "Happy 2nd Birthday Jackson!" Me: ... Woman: DON'T YOU SEE IT?! Me: I think it's a lovely ca-" Woman: IT'S IN CURSIVE! WHY THE HECK WOULD THEY PUT IT IN CURSIVE? HE'S TWO! Me: Oh...well, it'll take me a couple of minutes to fill these balloons. I bet you could take it back, and they could scrape off the old lettering, re-frost the blank space, and rewrite it for you.
Woman (clearly hasn't heard a word I said): I CAN'T BELIEVE SOMEONE IS SO STUPID TO THINK THIS IS OKAY! Me (yelling above her): CAN YOUR SON EVEN READ?! She immediately fell silent, blushed a deep purple, and was silent while I filled her balloons. She paid without a word.
97. The Fountain Runneth Dry
I run a convenience store inside a mall. Just outside our store is a lovely fountain, only it's drained. It has been that way since before we got the store last year. One day, I was sitting around, enjoying the cool air on my face. Our store is located on a kind of odd angle, where one wall is shorter than the other, and you can see people walking by through the glass windows.
I sat around watching mall traffic while keeping an eye on my game, always alert for trouble. At one point, my idyllic view was interrupted by the sight of a man, clearly with a purpose, striding directly toward me. I didn't even have time to give my usual chipper, "How you doin’ today?" line. The angry man asked me a question that threw me off-guard: “When are they going to turn on the fountain?”
I apologetically replied that I have no idea. A moment passed and the man’s brow furrowed. It appeared as though he was not sure how to process the fact that I didn't have an answer. Then he said, apparently to make the situation clear to me, “They drained all the fountains!” It was my turn to be confused. Clearly, they drained all the fountains...I'd been looking at the empty fountain all day long, so I would know.
I don't know why he thought I didn't notice...Did he think it was my fault? Maybe he didn't know that the mall makes its own decisions. So, I told him, “You'd have to ask the mall management. We're just a convenience store.” He firmly told me, “I will!" And with his sense of duty now apparently locked onto a new target, he stomped on out of the store with the same clear sense of purpose.
98. Father Figure
The owner of this convenience store near me is a family friend and asked me if I could cover because they were short on staff. There wasn't much to do, so I decided to walk around and reorganize misplaced items when suddenly a kid, who is maybe 3-4 years old, holds onto my hand. I kind of look around to see if someone lost their kid, and then I see a young lady give me a "go on" gesture.
I'm a bit confused about what she wants me to do, but whatever, I was bored and this kid looked cooler than my friends. So I asked if he liked candy and asked which one he liked. He didn't say anything and just pointed to some gummy worms. Me: That's cool. Me too! I like the sour ones because I can make a sour face.
This made the kid laugh. He says: “I love you, daddy,” then he hugs me. To be honest, I freaked out a bit and thought this kid couldn't possibly be mine. As I looked over to the young lady, she started tearing up. So I say, “I love you too, son.” The boy ran back to the lady, and the lady walks up to me and hugs me. That’s when I learned the heartbreaking truth.
The lady tells me: “I'm so sorry for that, my husband just passed two days ago. This is the first time I’ve heard him talk since that day.” They proceeded to leave. The boy is waving his gummy worms at me and I do the sour face and he does the same.
99. Greasing The Parts
At the time, I was the front desk receptionist at a car dealership that had an attached service and parts department. I dealt with all kinds of people, but this one customer particularly left me dumbfounded. It was around 7 pm, about an hour after the service and parts department had closed. The sales department was open until 8 pm, so I was just going about my business as usual.
A woman walked up to my desk and slammed a 19-liter jug of motor oil down on the counter. That scared me since I was looking away at the time. She immediately demanded that I sell her the oil. I was confused and just kind of...looked at her for a moment. There was no checkout counter at my desk as we were in an entirely different part of the building.
Also, where did she get that? The parts department was closed and the window into the storeroom was locked with a fold-down metal cage. I finally got myself together and told her that the parts department was closed and that I would be unable to sell anything. Her reaction was priceless. She immediately got angry, blowing her top while gesturing to the closest window demanding that I give her the oil.
I suggested for her to go to another shop nearby, as they were open until 9 pm. Surely, she could get oil there. She didn't like that answer and scoffed at me. "I need Kia brand oil, for my Kia brand car." She said it incredibly matter-of-factly and stared at me like I was the dumbest person on the planet. That again caught me off guard.
I have pretty bad anxiety, so I was still mentally and physically reeling from her slamming the bottle down and I was not getting very collected thoughts. I tried to explain that any brand of oil would do and that I'd be happy to help her figure out what would work best so she could pick it up there...but she just kept shaking her head at me.
Finally, she shouted out that she would just come back the following day, that I had been absolutely no help, and stormed out. I noticed then that she had a kid with her. What a great example she set for her children. I did figure out that she had pulled the oil jug down off of a display case in the service department. That was extra amusing to me, imagining someone taking something off of a clearly not-for-sale display shelf because she was mad.
100. On Lock Down
I’m a locksmith. I was in the shop one day and a customer was in getting some keys copied. It was a nice and simple job. Suddenly while I've got the machine running, some shirtless guy comes in looking really frantic. I tell him I'll be just a minute longer, then I finish the keys and send the first customer on his way. Frantic dude: "Jeez, took you long enough, I need you to come unlock my car."
I'm already a little annoyed since it’s almost closing time, but I just figure he's got a kid/dog/groceries in the car and give him the benefit of the doubt. Me: "No problem, where is it?" FD: "A couple of miles that way, my girlfriend drove me over here. You can follow us to it." I get some info from him, the kind of car it is, his name/number/address in case we get separated, etc.
FD: "My phone's in the car so if you call it, I won't answer" Me: "Then how about your girlfriend's number?" FD: "Hers is in there too" Well, ok then. Since it's pretty much closing time, I just go ahead and set the alarm and lock the doors to the story as I leave. He doesn't like this and starts saying how I'm taking forever.
Yeah, yeah, take a chill pill. I get in my truck and follow him out there. When we get there, I grab my tools and head to his car. I take one look and instantly feel something is off. Surprisingly, there's nothing in there except for the keys on the seat. No kids or dogs, so now I'm just hoping it's actually their car. FD: "You'd better not mess up my doors, this is a classic."
I open it up in about 10 seconds and check the insurance card. Yup, it's their car. I pick up the keys and go over to him, tell him it's $40, and he just looks at me dumbfounded. FD: "Wait you mean I have to pay for this?" Ummm, yeah? Me: "Yes sir, we charge a service call when we have to go out to the location." FD: "Well I'm not paying for that, you did it in 10 seconds, I could've done that myself if I'd have known."
Me: "Well I'm sorry, but I can't do this for free." To be honest, I could've, but there was no real urgency like a life endangered, plus he was rude about the whole thing. Also, we normally would just bill someone in the situation, but we've been burned too many times, so we'll only do that for companies now. FD: "I'm not paying for that, I don't have any money." Then I get an ingenious idea.
Me: "Then if you think you can do it yourself, go for it." I throw his keys back in the car, lock the doors, shut them behind me, and leave. I get home about 10 minutes later, then after probably an hour, he calls back. FD: "I can't get it open, come back and open my car again." Me: "I can go out again, but I'll have to charge you for two service calls."
FD: "Screw you, I'm not paying you 80 bucks." Me: "Then you can call the other locksmith nearby, I'm sure he'll be happy to help y-" click I didn't tell him, but they charge $100 to unlock cars. Never heard back from him.
101. Dog Days
Several years ago, I used to work as a dog trainer at a very well-known pet supply store. While I was a dog trainer, it was still retail, so of course, I had to do 100 things outside of my job description. As a result, I was working the cash register, stocking, and yes, helping our loyal customers. The store I worked at was an absolute disaster with Karens, too.
Big, white suburban neighborhoods were situated around this store, so they came in like hordes. Well, on this particular day, it was vet day. Basically, a local vet service partnered with the store to offer quick walk-in vet checkups for things like vaccinations. Of course, put "cheap" and "Karens" together and you get the worst workday of your week.
This week, the store was packed. The line went all the way to the front, and we were the biggest store in the area. People were asking me questions left and right, dogs were relieving themselves everywhere, and kids were playing with the dog toys. It was the whole shebang. I was already like a headless chicken, having to juggle five tasks while also prepping for a dog training class. Yay.
But as I was making my way from the vet station helping another customer, I saw her, and she definitely looked like trouble. She had a dark tan, shoulder-length straight hair, sunglasses, and she was dragging a couple of kids down the aisle toward me. She looked like she was wanting to turn into the Hulk and was ready to fight. I prepped myself before I started to say, "How can I help—"
She stopped me in the middle of my sentence by saying one loud word, "Dogs!" She had a crazy gleam in her eyes. I tried to decipher her cryptic message and asked, "Dog...toys? Dog...food?" She then said, “Where are your dogs?” It took a second for my brain to catch up with her shrieks; to understand that she was hoping that we sold dogs.
Now, luckily, big box stores like this one tend to not sell dogs directly. Otherwise, they would get them from puppy mills. But now, unfortunately, I had to inform this lady that we were not that kind of store. I geared myself up for a battle, then said: "I am sorry, ma’am, but we do not sell dogs he—" She cursed and shrieked, then immediately spun around, pulling her kids like ragdolls the entire time.
She then stomped out the door again. It felt like I got hit and run over by words. This interaction was less than 30 seconds, so it was like a new record. It was then that I decided it would be best if I took my break before doing my next class.
102. Taking A Bow
Several years back, I was working at a small beauty supply store in the southern part of the US. Among other things, we sold little clip-in hairpieces. A family of four had come in and the mom and dad were discussing products in the first aisle while the two little girls were running unsupervised through the store, being loud and making messes.
It was truck day, and I had been stocking shelves out of a shopping cart, referred to as a buggy by many people in that area. It was chock full to the brim. I had gone to the stock room and when I came back 30 seconds later, I saw one of the little girls pushing my cart around the corner of the opposite end of the aisle.
She was standing on her tiptoes and still could not see over the handle. I heard her say something to her mother and her mother told her, "Put that back where you found it." By that time, I had nearly caught up with the kid, who had turned the basket around. She pushed the cart up to me and said proudly, "Ma'am, are you lookin' for yer buggy?"
I replied, "You do not need to be messing with that." That's when the mom's Karen came out. She came roaring around the corner saying how I should not speak directly to her child and that if I had something to say, then I should say it to her. Never mind the fact that the kid had run into a shelf, slipped a bit on the tile floors, and almost turned the basket over on herself on the opposite side of the store from her mother's location.
I did not bother to argue about safety concerns and instead went back to stocking shelves. A little while later, the mother asked me to help her match the color of her hair to the hairpieces. I helped her pick one out, then heard her confirm to her husband that it was the one she wanted. I then went up to the register, while she rounded up her kids.
When she got to the checkout, the hairpiece that she put on the counter was a different one than what I had seen her discussing. I asked her about it and she indicated that the other one was more than she could afford, but she planned to come back for it. I rang her out and they left. The next day, I got to work and the opening clerk said, "I got one of your customers today."
I said, "Oh yeah?" I didn't get customer complaints often, but that particular week, I had someone else come in, while I was off, saying that I was rude. They had been unhappy that I had prevented them from shoplifting but they gave some other bogus reason to complain. When my coworker confirmed this, it was in a tone that made it clear I was in for a ride a bit later.
So, I asked, "Have you ever seen me be rude to a customer?" "No," she answered. "It always seems like you're sweet, but to hear them tell it, you're big and bad." About that time, the door opened, and in walked the hairpiece woman and her kids. It was about to go down. She started laying into me about how she had come to return the hairpiece that she got yesterday.
We did not take returns on hairpieces in the first place. However, she said that in the process of trying to return it with my co-worker, they had found a discrepancy between the item that she was trying to return and the one I had rang up. So, my coworker had asked her to come back during my shift so I could assist with the return.
This woman pulled the product that she wanted to return out and it was a different product than the one she purchased from me—in fact, it was the one that I had heard her tell her husband she wanted...and it was in a different product box. I told her as much, and she started screaming, saying that I better not be calling her a liar.
She also started making thinly veiled physical threats. In the meantime, one of her darling kids had come back around the sales counter where I was standing and she was trying to get my attention to get in on the action. I was ignoring the girl, but she kept tapping me on the hip. I whirled around and curtly said, "Don't touch me."
Then, remembering the scene from the day before, I snapped my head back to the mom and smiled sweetly. Through gritted teeth, but with the most upbeat voice, I said, "I am sorry, could you please tell your child not to touch me and remove her from behind the counter. It's not safe for her to be back here." She snarled, "That's better."
She barked a command at her kid, then made it clear that she would be back in an hour to continue her reign of terror. Shortly after she left, our store manager arrived unexpectedly early for the closing shift. We brought her up to speed on what had been going on. When the lady came back, I happened to be in the stock room.
My manager closed the stock room door and told me in the sternest voice ever: "Do NOT come out." I could only hear snippets through the door, so I don't know exactly what happened. I got the picture that we must have given her some money back as a one-time thing, probably because the other option was to refer to corporate, who would have given her money back.
But then I very clearly heard the woman's voice ring across the store, "Go get her and bring her out here. I am going to snatch her up and…" "You will not lay a hand on my employee," my manager emphatically interrupted. I did not hear any of the exchange after that, because I was so shocked at my sweet, proper manager's firm retort.
My coworker, apparently, was similarly surprised. The consensus among the employees after that was that we were pretty proud of how tough our manager could be if needed. They also decided that if I was being rude to a "customer," it was probably someone stealing.
