It Wasn’t Me: Innocent People Share Their Wild Stories Of Being Falsely Accused
If there’s one thing in life that we can all be sure of, it’s that people can never be trusted! Whether it’s for the sake of personal gain, spiteful revenge, or just plain reckless amusement, some folks are more than happy to completely shift the blame with false accusations. And there’s hardly any feeling worse in this world than being blamed for something that we didn’t do. Here are stories about some of the worst things people have ever been falsely accused of.
1. A Rock Solid Alibi
I was once falsely accused of destroying a window at my old school by dropping a rock from a higher floor. I was subsequently interrogated by the school principal. My parents were called, friends had to fund the repairs, and I was bullied on the bus because of it. It freaking sucked. Eventually, two years later, we found out who had really been behind the incident. Sadly, by then, nobody cared.
2. In the Bag
When I was 16 years old, I was riding in the car with a friend back to another friend’s house and an officer pulled him over. I had nothing bad on me. He, unbeknownst to me, had a bag of inappropriate substances in the car, and decided to throw it underneath my chair. The officer found it and locked us both up. They took him to a regular holding center since he was 17, and they took me to juvie since I was 16.
He got out before me and hired a lawyer. He then falsely pinned the whole thing on me through his family connections. I got the charges reduced to a misdemeanor because I was a good kid and it showed. Nevertheless, the charge ruined my life for a good five years. I just heard that the kid is all grown up now and broke into his ex-girlfriend’s house to take stuff from her.
Apparently, he is pretty much a burnt-out loser. Meanwhile, I’m applying for law school next spring.
3. Picture Perfect
When I was 14 years old, I had just started to learn how to use a digital camera. The only one that I had access to at the time was my mom’s. Sometime after my birthday, the SD card that belonged to her went missing. I knew that I wasn’t the one who had lost it because I was always extremely careful and responsible when borrowing other people’s things.
Nevertheless, my dad immediately started to blame me for losing it and my mom was desperately hoping to find it so that she wouldn’t lose all of her precious photos. After over an hour of interrogating me, she still couldn’t find it. Then, eventually, she found it in her normal place where she always puts her valuables for safekeeping. I never even got a freakin’ apology…
4. Inconvenience Store
In third grade, I once walked into a convenience store with two dollars in my pocket, and spent 20 minutes trying to decide which candy to get—picking things up and putting them back as I weighed the decision. The old lady clerk falsely accused me of pocketing stuff and ordered me never to come back to the store again. That was a bit problematic for me, given that this was the only gas station in my entire small town.
5. Ain’t That a Kick in the Head
I was once falsely accused of kicking my young son. I was carrying something like hot tea or soup and he went to grab my leg, so I put my knee out to stop him from getting close to me and scolding himself. For some unknown reason, everyone else in the room thought I kicked him or kneed him in the head. It was a very strange situation.
6. Sister Act
When I was 11 years old, I was falsely accused by a babysitter of being mean to my little sister when, in reality, I was just playing my Nintendo DS with her. It was completely unbelievable, because we later got her to admit that she had made the whole thing up so that she wouldn’t have to change diapers. She immediately got fired by my mom and the last I saw of her, she was living in her car.
7. Trash Talking
I was nine years old and a girl scout. I was attending a girl scout camp, and the leader falsely accused me of throwing trash around the campsite. She made me sit in a chair by myself in the corner of a building as a punishment. I remember crying over the whole situation. For the record, I didn’t throw any trash around the campsite. The leader was just a very mean woman.
8. Teaching You a Lesson
I know this may sound ridiculous, but it really happened. In second grade, another child in my class falsely accused me of calling my teacher a dummy. No one believed me when I claimed innocence. When I got home, I received a spanking AND was forced to apologize. I felt so powerless because, since all of the adults believed I was guilty, in effect I basically was. I think I’m still a little mad about it to this day!
9. Blacking Out
My wife and I were asleep in bed one night and, when we woke up, she rolled over to get out of bed. She accidentally hit her eye on the corner of her nightstand and it left a sick, nasty, bruised cut and black eye on her face for about a week. I then had to deal with a bunch of friends constantly asking me if I hit her. One “friend” even gave me the business, saying it’s “not cool to hit your wife.”
10. Where the Money Goes
I once got fired from a job for allegedly sneaking cash out of the register, which was a double whammy because I was actually putting money into the cash register at the end of my shift to cover shortfalls which I frequently had. I really loved my job, so I would cover the shortfall to keep everything running smoothly.
On average, this meant I was sacrificing about 10-20% of my wages. Yet it never occurred to me to count the amount of money in the till at the start of my shift. I think I was just too excited to be there and, being young, I couldn’t possibly imagine my bosses and managers ever lying to me. I guess I was a pretty naive kid…
A year later, the manager got caught swiping money from the till. She had apparently been doing it for years and blaming staff. There was a very high turnover of staff because of this. Officers wanted to press charges, but the owner said ‘no’ and told them that they would take care of it internally. Then came the true plot twist: It turns out that the business was owned by the mafia.
11. He Shoots, He Misses!
I was falsely accused of plotting to cause mass physical harm to a bunch of people at my old high school on two separate occasions. I guess that’s what I get for being the really quiet kid.
12. Smoke Gets in Your Eyes
My mother falsely accused me of using pot back in high school because she once found a matchbook in the pocket of my pants while she was doing my laundry. I only had the matchbook because it had a funny cartoon character on it, so I decided to keep it for jokes! My only real mistake was being immature, I guess.
13. Does Not Compute
My sister once falsely accused me of swiping her laptop that she had gotten as a present for her birthday. My dad got all angry at me about it, and said that I probably swiped it so that I could sell it or something stupid like that. He kept telling me to give it back and I kept saying that I didn’t have it. Well, a little while later, the little angel comes out of her room—I couldn’t believe my eyes. She’s holding the laptop. It turns out that it had been under her bed the whole time.
14. Dog Days
This is tame compared to many of these other stories, but it’s something that has stuck with me for ages. When I was really little, maybe about six years old, my aunt was once babysitting me. My sweet dog happened to have been shedding fur at the time. When my aunt saw the fur on the ground, she accused me of giving my dog a haircut.
When I denied the accusation and explained that the dog was merely shedding, she held me across her knee saying she would spank me if I didn’t confess to what I had done. I was sobbing uncontrollably because I loved my dog and would never do that to her. My mom came home not long after and I remember her being livid.
Despite my issues with my mom, she never once laid a hand on me. My mom could not believe that her sister didn’t understand that animals shed fur in clumps.
15. Cheater Cheater Pumpkin Eater
I got falsely accused of cheating at sports by using anabolic steroids. I was a high jumper on my college’s track and field team, and we would have to do urine tests every so often. Well, one of my tests came back from the lab positive for anabolic steroids, which give women who take them strong manly like features.
I was 5’8” tall and 125 lbs. Luckily, the lab broke the tests into two samples and eventually tested the second sample. The second one showed that I was clean. Apparently, the lab had a contaminated batch of test tubes, and the company had to fly reps into my college to apologize to me and a baseball player who the same thing happened to. It was a very scary couple of weeks for me when I was going through it all.
16. I’m Guessing You Didn’t Leave a Tip…
I got kicked out of a sit down restaurant during my company’s Christmas party for allegedly doing inappropriate substances in the bathroom. When the manager of the restaurant told me to leave and that they “don’t allow that kind of behavior here,” my boss and at least 20 other employees vouched for me and insisted that I had not once left the table for the entire two hours that we had all been eating there. I thought it was over, but I was so wrong.
The manager called my boss an idiot and still made me leave. No one from my company has been back to that restaurant again ever since.
17. Let’s Get Creative
There was a creative writing class for seniors at my high school that I wanted to get into. Basically, in order to get in, you had to write a creative piece and submit it as your application to the class. I wrote a piece and got accepted into the class. The class was in my second semester (spring). At the end of the fall semester, my mom announced that she was pulling me out of the class.
Why? Because she was falsely accusing me of plagiarizing my paper. She thought that I didn’t really write it because, in her words, it wasn’t like any other papers I had written before. No kidding! That’s because it was for a creative writing class!! I did write it, though, and she had no actual evidence to suggest that I copied it from anywhere.
18. Young at Heart
I was falsely accused of substance use. Shockingly enough, my parents’ divorce made me act out at nine years old, and I kept distracting other kids in class. My mom was convinced that this behavior was because I was using inappropriate substances. She yanked hair out of my head and made me get blood tested. They found nothing, because I was nine years old!
19. Facing the Harsh Reality
As a kid, I was falsely accused of purposely throwing bleach at a different kid’s face. What really happened is that we were messing around pretending to interview each other in the kitchen and I grabbed the bleach that was on the side to use as a mic, but the lid wasn’t screwed on properly. It accidentally came open while I was holding it and it ended up squirting into his face.
I still feel so bad about the whole thing, even all these years later. But how was I supposed to know that the lid wasn’t screwed on right??!! Being accused of doing it intentionally did not help my feelings of guilt too much either. We were probably both around 10 years old at the time when this happened, and it still bugs me to this day.
20. This One Sounds Pretty Aggravating
I started my present job, and was fired after a week because my background check came back stating that I was wanted in the city for Aggravated Assault against a family member. For the record, I have never hurt a family member, and I had no idea where this claim was coming from. I’m back at work now, but what a bad day that was!
When I found out the truth, I was shocked. It turned out that the charges were against someone else who had the exact same first and last name as me. I have a pretty common name, so that part wasn’t the biggest deal in the world. But to make matters even crazier, it turned out that the guy also had the same birthday as me; except, in his case, it was 40 years earlier.
I was about six or seven years old when my family took us to this big house party hosted at our pastor’s home. While there, I found the other kids and we all started playing games together. Well, there were some bars there along some stairs (like part of the handle going up), and this one girl decided that she wanted to play “prison.”
She started pulling on the bars pretending that she was in a cell. Within a couple of minutes of this, she broke the bars completely off the staircase. So, for the rest of the party, she went around telling everyone “Look what (insert my name here) did!” Well, that claim eventually got around to the owner of the house, and he was not very happy with me because he had just renovated those stairs.
My parents then had to offer to pay for the repairs, all because I was too afraid to tell them that it wasn’t actually my fault.
22. Puppy Love
Not me, but my father was accused of kidnapping our neighbor’s dog and leaving it at a remote beach. When I was a kid, we had a rocky relationship with one of the neighbors because they had a yappy dog that they took very poor care of. It drove the whole street mad but, for some reason, it never got taken away by animal control.
A few years ago, my parents moved to another part of town. Afterwards, my dad worked on the old house to get it ready to sell. One day, he was on the driveway when the neighbors left in their car. They made eye contact. Then, when the neighbors returned home, their dog was inexplicably missing. They instantly accused my dad of sneaking over and taking the dog because he’d had enough of it.
He tried to explain that an animal control van had briefly come through the street shortly after they left, but they weren’t having any of it. They were so convinced that he had done something that they started a massive social media campaign to pressure him into admitting it. This included invading all the local community groups and “outing” him.
They even went so far as to drive an hour out of town to the beach we often go to on the weekends to put up posters calling him a murderer. It was wild, stressful, and stupid. It only stopped after we picked up a lawyer and sent a cease and desist letter threatening to take them to court for public defamation. The dog was never found and apparently they have two new ones now. This was also the same family that found someone else’s lost cat and decided to keep it…
23. Guilty by Association
At the age of 13, I was once falsely accused by the vice-principal of my high school of helping with an insanely twisted plot. The reason I was accused was because I was friends with a lonely guy who got dumped by a girl, and then decided he wanted to hurt her in some way. The adults then found out that he had been telling people he wanted to hurt her.
Because I was friends with him, they assumed that I had been helping him plot an actual real-life attack. None of that was actually true. Nevertheless, the fact that I was this guy’s only friend meant that I was accused. I was suspended from school for a week, given another week of in-school suspension, and my grades plummeted as this was the end of the semester and big projects were due.
My classmates lost a lot of respect for me and my reputation took years to rebuild. I lost several friends who refused to listen to my side of the story, and I had a multi-year court battle after high school to get my record cleared so that I could get a job. I’m 23 years old now and I am still facing repercussions from the complete indifference of someone I was supposed to look up to and respect.
24. Watch What You Accuse People Of
I was falsely accused by my family of swiping a priceless family heirloom. My grandfather had received a gold watch in WWII because his baseball team had won the “World Series of the European Theater.” The Army had set that tournament up so that GIs would have something to do in France during their off time. I don’t remember all the exact details, but that was the gist of it.
I was always interested in the watch and the story behind it. One day, my grandfather noticed it was missing. It wasn’t long before my aunts and my uncles started to accuse me of taking it. My grandfather was distraught and later his health deteriorated. My family tried to imply that this was my fault, due to my taking the watch.
Several years later, soon after my grandfather’s funeral, a waitress from the local Bob Evans tracked down my uncle—and we all learned the heartbreaking truth. My grandfather, who ate at the Bob Evans every day, had given her a handsome tip that she didn’t feel right keeping. Lo and behold, it was the watch. He had given it to her and then forgotten that he had done so.
25. Disproportionate Response
My ex-wife once falsely told her friends that I had been beating her physically. I never knew about this until I noticed that many of our friends had started avoiding me, bad mouthing me, etc. and I slowly put the pieces together that something wasn’t right. When I finally asked a friend why the change, he said, “We know what’s been going on behind closed doors.”
I told him I had no idea what he was talking about. That’s when he told me about the rumors and I could not believe what I was hearing. It turned out that she had gotten mad because I wouldn’t give her an unlimited amount of spending money, so she decided to make up false allegations about me as revenge. I still have no idea what she spent the first $10,000 I gave her on! I had never even touched her, nor threatened to, at any point in our relationship.
26. Follow the Money
I was falsely accused of using inappropriate substances as a teenager. When I was in high school, I had a very monotonous voice that my parents thought was fake. Any time we were around other people, they would always ask someone to tell me what I sounded like. Apparently, they thought that if I was embarrassed enough I would start to talk “normally.”
Instead, this just made me talk less and, over time, it shut me out from some of the friends in my life. When my parents realized I wasn’t talking a lot, they immediately jumped to conclusions and accused me of doing substances. What really made them convinced of this was when I lost a $20 bill at my school’s picnic one day.
They were constantly counting my money to see if they could prove their suspicions. When they realized that I had $40 less than they were expecting one day, they demanded that I tell them what happened to it. I explained to them that I had a picnic at school and brought $40 with me to spend on food, but lost half of it.
They said my story didn’t add up, so they started to rummage through my backpack and room any time I wasn’t at home. They would also ask for the names of my friends and anyone that I was talking to, so that they could run background checks on them.
27. Parental Guidance
My ex-boyfriend and I broke up on extremely messy terms. I won’t detail everything, but a lot of drama happened leading up to the breakup. I changed colleges and he told all his friends and everyone who knew me that he had gotten me pregnant and that this was the reason why I left. Considering that premarital relations warrants disownment or even honor killings back home in our culture, this really screwed up my relationship with my parents.
By this point, they had already been ready to kick me out of the house for the mere fact of just having a boyfriend. We had never even slept together, but I suppose he didn’t want to admit that I ended things. Of course, the news spread and came back to my parents. They disowned me after accusing me of being promiscuous. They even went as far as to assume that I was sleeping with all of my male friends. But I was hiding something else.
Around the time that they “officially” disowned me, I was waiting for results to confirm whether or not I had breast cancer. My parents didn’t believe me until two years after the lie.
28. On the Ball
In fourth grade, someone kept removing mouse balls from the computer lab at my school. I remember our teacher warning us about it. Then, one day, my teacher pulled me aside and told me that someone had accused me of being the mouse ball thief. It was a guy I was friendly with but not friends with, kind of an outcast. I assured him this was totally false and I think he believed me. After all, I was a mostly good kid.
The next day at school, I look inside my pencil box and what do I find but a mouse ball sitting inside! I’m freaking out. I go up to the teacher probably talking a million miles an hour about how I didn’t take the mouse ball, didn’t know why it was in my pencil box, etc. He looks at me doubtfully and says he’ll have to discuss it with the principal and figure out what to do with me.
The whole evening I’m still freaking out. My mom has the idea of looking my accuser up in the phone book. I looked that jerk up and confronted him and his father about what was happening. He denied doing anything on the phone. The next day, though, the kid admitted to the teacher first thing in the morning that he had planted the ball as a “practical joke.” I saw the guy years later and he was trying to be friendly, but I found myself still annoyed about this incident.
29. Name Calling
I was once falsely accused of calling a girl at my old school a bunch of bad words. In reality, she was the one who had been calling me these things! And it had been going on for a pretty long time, too. I even had multiple witnesses who knew that my side of the story was true. The whole thing was just so extremely stupid…
30. You’ve Got It in the Bag
During the holiday season, a lot of retail stores hire extra security for their stores in order to prevent shoplifting. On an important side note, a lot of these security guards get bonuses paid to them based on the number of people that they catch trying to shoplift. During one holiday season, I was shopping at a chain cosmetics store and was falsely accused of shoplifting.
It turned out they were sneaking products into my bag when I wasn’t looking. Okay, I was also stupid to put my bag down while trying samples, but still. They tapped me on the shoulder as I was walking out and, next thing I knew, I was being interrogated by a bunch of security guards. I did actually make some purchases at that store, but I didn’t realize what was in my bag because I paid using Apple Pay on my phone, which doesn’t require me to look in my bag.
Also, it was a larger bag than average, that I was exclusively using to put purchased items into because I was holiday shopping for several people. This is why I never noticed that other items have been added into it. I had no idea that these kinds of security tricks existed, so I had no reason to have my guard up. I’ve definitely learned my lesson…
The store managers were obviously in on the trick as well, since they didn’t care for what I had to say in my defense. They didn’t check the security cameras on request, because “the guards witnessed me putting products in my bag.” I also couldn’t fight that hard because I was an international student here on a visa. Expulsion from school meant getting kicked out of the country.
31. Bringing Out the Animal in Him
My entire town thought I made an animal at the zoo cry because I threw a peanut at it. As soon as one kid falsely accused me of this, the rumor spread like wildfire and everyone believed it. Turns out, in reality, some old man had taken one of the animal’s eggs, and that’s why it was crying. But some people out there care more about a good story than the truth!
32. Guns A-Blazing
I once helped a friend of my mother’s move, shortly after I had just turned 18. I did it for no pay, just as a favor to her. Nevertheless, this lady still had the nerve to accuse me of swiping one of her guns while on the job. I booked it straight to the authorities to explain the situation to them before she could cause any trouble. When she tried to report me, they told her she was crazy, that they had already spoken to me, and that bad guys who take other people’s guns don’t go directly to the authorities to inform them!
33. Let It Snow, Let It Snow, Let It Snow
In first grade, I was outside playing during recess one day. Suddenly, I was approached by a crying little kid holding a teacher’s hand. They walked up to me and said “He did it!” The teacher then asked me why I threw a snowball with sand mixed in into her face. I said I didn’t know what she was talking about, because I really didn’t do it! I was taken inside to the office and they called my mom about it.
After I went back to class, some kids were telling me that they all knew it was this other kid that did it, but no one ever told the teacher apparently. Sure enough, in the next day’s recess, I realized that the culprit had the same exact winter coat that I did. It’s been 20 years since that happened and I still haven’t forgotten about it. Screw you, Matt!
34. What a Wild Ride
I was once falsely accused of breaking a girl’s arm inside a bouncy castle at a local fair when I was about eight years old. I had only been on there for a few seconds, and I was just minding my own business and doing my thing. All of a sudden, I heard some kid start screaming. We all stopped. The girl had an obviously broken arm. Then, in front of all the adults, this girl pointed straight at me with her non-broken arm, of course, and said: “He did it!”
The dude in charge immediately kicked me off. No refund. I found my family and explained what had happened to them. My uncle said that he had been recording me on his camcorder when it happened. This was 1982. The camcorder was the size of a briefcase and ran on VHS tapes, so we had no way to play the film back while still at the fair.
When we got home, we plugged the thing into the VCR and played the video back. Turns out it was absolutely 100% true that it was not me. But then I got a life lesson in how being right doesn’t mean you win. My dad pointed out that we would have to walk fifteen minutes back to the bouncy castle and argue with them, with no way of showing them the video unless they sent someone to our house to watch it. And all of that just to get back the ten bucks that I paid for five minutes of fun inside the castle. It would have been, at best, a pyrrhic victory. But most likely, they’d have just told us to buzz off.
35. Am I a Joke to You?
I used to frequently play jokes on a coworker of mine, to the point where he started attributing random stuff that happened to my malice. The most notable and longest-lasting example of this involved his office chair. It all started one day when he came back from lunch and sat down. “Whoa! What the heck?” I heard him shout from down the hall.
A startled look came across his face, then he turned a critical eye upon me. “Okay, was it you?” he asked. I was honestly confused as to what was happening. “What? Was what me?” I replied. He said, “You adjusted my office chair while I was gone, didn’t you?” I replied, “Um, no.” Of course, I had pranked him so much that he took any denial on my part as further evidence that I had, in fact, carried out this dastardly deed.
I watched as he made some minor adjustments to his chair and returned to work. From that day forward, this whole scenario would repeat itself over and over again at least once or twice a week. At no point did I ever actually touch his chair, but he was 100% convinced that I was doing this on a regular basis to mess with him. Frankly, I was flattered. I’d progressed to a level of pranking mastery where I didn’t even have to actually prank anymore. My victim just started pranking himself and attributing it to me.
36. Tooth Fairy
As a kid, I wasn’t aware that you were supposed to wet your toothbrush before brushing your teeth. As a result of this gap in my knowledge, I would always put toothpaste onto my dry brush, rub back and forth for like 20 seconds on my teeth, and then spit into the sink a hundred times. No, I was not a good brusher, but at least I did something!
But then it happened. I walk out of the bathroom after one of my pitiful teeth cleaning sessions, and my dad walks up to me and asks me if I really brushed my teeth that night. What a silly question! Of course I did! I was a good kid! I always did whatever my parents asked me to do! I didn’t want any cavities or to be a bad boy!
So my dad walks into the bathroom and, while I didn’t know this at the time, he checked to see if my toothbrush was wet. And, of course, after not rinsing it and barely putting it in my mouth, it was totally bone dry. So as you’d expect, my dad then immediately marched out and told me to get back into the bathroom and brush my teeth for real.
I was completely shocked and hurt. I did brush my teeth, dad! To this day I know that I did, but you didn’t believe me! I argued as best as a six-year-old could, but he wasn’t having any of it. I brushed my teeth a second time, right in front of him. It was the only way to prove to him that I did it. But I already did, dad. I already did.
37. A Watchful Eye
We lived in a townhome condo complex. My mom was fighting with the board over misused funds. While she was at work, there was a knock at our door. One of the neighbors had an emergency and asked if I could come and watch her kids while she went to the hospital. I said sure. I was 16 years old and had been babysitting for more than four years.
I spent the next few hours looking after two cute kids, three and five years old respectively. I got back home before my mom did. We started dinner and there was a knock at the door. It was a pair of officers. What they told me made my blood run cold. The mother had gone to the local station and accused me of abusing her three-year-old. She said that I hit her and locked her in the dryer for several hours.
My mom asked the officer if he was insane. She pointed out that I was the kid who picked caterpillars off the sidewalk and put them on the grass so that people wouldn’t step on them. She asked the officer to point out the complainant. When he pointed, my mom asked me if I was crazy because that’s the woman who took funds from the condo board. Why would I go over there?
I said I didn’t know that and that she had said she needed to go to the hospital immediately because her dad had had a heart attack. The officer said they would be back. They came back an hour later and said that I would not need to come with them after all. Turns out her dad was alive and well. I, on the other hand, was not so well after going through a full-blown panic attack for an hour.
38. Paying It Forward
This happened just the other day. I’m a manager at a grocery store. A customer wanted to purchase a $2,900 money order, paying cash. I did not feel comfortable counting that amount of money out in the open, so I took it to our cash room. Turns out, they had only given me $1,900. I brought it back out and she said that she’d go to her car and recount.
30 minutes later, I got called into the store manager’s office because the woman’s mom called and said that she definitely had $2,900 and, since I took the money away, that I must have pocketed $1,000 of it from her. I did not.
39. Boss Baby
I was falsely accused of running a gang by a high school teacher. I kid you not, the teacher legitimately believed that I had planned out each and every move of mine in terms of how to make the school and life a living nightmare for everyone in it. She thought I had a structure running through the school, and that I was the kingpin in charge of it all. She thought I Godfather-ed people into owing me favors and getting them to do stuff for me. I just thought I had a lot of friends…
40. Stuck Between a Rock and a Hard Place
I was falsely accused of plagiarism. My senior year Igneous Geophysics professor didn’t believe that I had actually written my final research paper. His argument was that the language, technical proficiency, structure, and quality was beyond what a senior level university student would normally be capable of preparing.
I had to go to a hearing, submit graded work from other professors to show consistency, and have signed letters from these professors stating that they believed the papers were not falsely submitted and were, in fact, prepared by me. It’s a very scary feeling to think that everything you have worked so hard for, for the past three years, may be stripped from you because you submitted something that was too well done.
41. But What’s for Dessert?
During my first week of high school, I got called into the office because false rumors were flying around that I was planning to blow up the school and had already rigged it with explosives. This was obviously news to me. Then, about a year later, I had my wisdom teeth removed and missed a week of school. When I finally came back, my friends had to explain the freaked out looks I kept getting from classmates.
Apparently, a boy who regularly picked on me had vanished from school around the same time I did, and the rumor going around was that I had eaten him, and then been detained. Everybody was surprised to see me back, because they’d spent the past week telling each other about how I was locked up and he was in my stomach. Folks sure make up weird rumors. The boy was fine, by the way. He had just been suspended.
42. A Nasty Tumble
I got falsely accused of purposely pushing my friend’s little sister off the bed and breaking her arm. We were both jumping on it and she accidentally fell down, but her older sister and her mom refused to believe that I didn’t push her. I was about seven or eight years old at the time. The little sister was only about three or four. It still messes with me to think that they instantly assumed I would do something like that to a defenseless little child…
43. True or False
I was falsely accused of physically harming a partner who didn’t want to end our relationship. I guess she thought that by accusing me of that, it would be harder for me to find anyone else. It cost me a promotion at work, because I was “being investigated” for a serious accusation. She filed a false report that initiated this and she was never charged, even though this carries a large penalty in my state.
44. Don’t Fence Me In
Our neighbor had severe dementia. My husband is very tall. His head reaches over the top of our backyard fence no matter what he does, simply because of his height. Nevertheless, this neighbor filed a report, falsely claiming that he was peeping on her. Her caretakers came to his defense and, when the officers saw him standing by the fence, they realized what had been going on.
It could have gone very badly though if the circumstances had been slightly different. From then on, my husband made sure to always steer clear of that half of the yard until she finally moved into an assisted living facility.
45. The Best Story Bar None
My favorite false accusation story is the time when I was accused of being underage at a bar, at the ripe old age of 23. Yes, I had a valid piece of ID to prove my age. The bouncer still yanked me out of the bar and accused me of being underage, on the grounds that the wristband I had on was more worn out than usual.
He claimed that this supposedly meant I had gotten it from someone else. In reality, I was messing with it because it was itchy. I then showed him my ID, which he proclaimed was fake. My friends came out, looked at the bouncer like he was an idiot, and told the manager outside that he had just lost about 150 dollars because of his incompetent bouncer.
I have never since gone back to that bar, instead preferring the Irish pub nearby with a decent crowd and bouncers that are not nuttier than squirrel poop.
46. Banking with Low Gas
I was early for my first day as a gas jockey in a new city. I was across the street from the gas station digging through my backpack when, all of a sudden, somebody told me to show them my hands. I was totally confused to look up and see two officers, hands on their arms, staring back at me. They didn’t draw their arms or anything, but it was still a really scary sight.
Turns out there had been a bank robbery around the corner a few minutes before, and my gas jockey uniform and backpack matched the description. They looked inside my bag, which contained only my brown bagged lunch and a paperback book, and then they were gone in a flash. Apparently, the real culprit didn’t get caught until the same thing happened again in the same area.
47. You’re Goin’ Away for a Long Time
I once got falsely accused of suffering from a very serious eating disorder. I’m not saying that there’s anything wrong with people who do suffer from those kinds of ailments, but it just simply wasn’t true in my case. As a matter of fact, I am probably as far from the disorder they thought I had as one can possibly be. I think the last time I puked was like ten years ago, when I was seasick as a little kid.
My doctor, however, refused to believe this due to my blood test results being wack. I even got locked up in a mental facility for some time. It was a whole ordeal.
48. I’m Not Following This One…
I was once falsely accused by my wife of passing gas in the bedroom. But I’m innocent, I tell you! I did not flatulate in the bedroom! And it’s about time I set the record straight once and for all. What actually happened was that I passed gas in the kitchen, and the smell merely followed me into the bedroom. I’m just a victim of circumstance!
49. Be Careful What You Wish For
One time, I was fighting with my brother, then realized that the fight was dumb so I just went to my room. After I left, my brother decided to PUNCH HIMSELF IN THE FACE and blame me for it. My mom initially believed him when she came into the room. She began to yell at me, and immediately told me that I was grounded.
“I can’t believe you did that to your brother, blah blah blah!” She was clearly very mad. So, I came up with a plan. I figured if I was about to get in trouble for it, I should actually do it. I turned around and clocked my brother in the face, to which he responded “I can’t believe she actually did that!” At that point, my mom realized that he had been lying. I ended up not getting in trouble.
50. What Time Is It?
One time I woke up late for school because my alarm didn’t go off. I am incredibly blind without my contacts and just glanced at the clock and was very late. In a furious panic to try somehow make it to the bus I put my contacts in, dunked my hair in water and grabbed my backpack and jacket as I sprinted to the bus stop.
It was the time of year where it’s dark outside well into the morning, so it was still pitch black. No one was at the bus stop, so I figured I missed. I still waited for quite some time in case it showed up. When I realized I was so late it wasn’t coming I walked back to my house, knowing I would have to wake my mom up to take me to school.
Fortunately, when I walked through the front door, she was already up waiting for me! She greeted me with, “WHERE THE HECK HAVE YOU BEEN?!?!” I responded that I was sorry, but late for the bus and needed her to take me to school. She glared at me and told me it was something like four in the morning.
I had somehow misread my alarm clock in my state of panic and tried to explain that I really did think I was late and was really at the bus stop. She just assumed I had snuck out with friends the night before and was just coming home, something I had been doing off and on for a while at that time. So, I was grounded for sneaking out, when in reality I just woke up too early to go to school.