We never know what to expect when we go to someone else’s house. From witnessing odd behaviors to things that go awry, these Redditors share some of their worst experiences while at someone else’s house. Both funny and disturbing, these crazy and shocking tales make a good argument for just staying home.
I was at a house party of a girl who, at one point, asked me out on a date. I declined at the time, despite actually liking her because I was going through so much family stuff at home. I couldn’t handle anything else and she knew that.
I was, having a few drinks, deep in my cups where you don’t taste much anymore when she handed me a drink that tasted kind of funny. Five minutes later, I was projectile vomiting and had dizziness and stomach pain. An ambulance was called, and I had my stomach pumped.
It turned out she didn’t take rejection well. I found out that she filled half of the cup with extra-strength dishwashing liquid. A week later, I asked her why she did it. She said, “I don’t know what you’re talking about”. Even though there were witnesses, she actually denied it.
My boyfriend asked me to watch his cat while he was in another country with his parents. I decided to clean up so my boyfriend's parents would come home to a clean house. I cleaned the fridge, the kitchen, and the rooms. Then, I decided to clean the cat's litter box. It hadn't occurred to me that the cat litter was made of clay.
So, I threw the lumps of litter right down the toilet. After a while, I went to the bathroom—and made a chilling discovery. I realized that all the clay was stuck to the bottom of the toilet, and the toilet was clogged. I took the toilet brush and tried to push the stuff down the bowl.
Eventually, all the clay stuck to the scrubber. I couldn't find gloves in the house, so I had to scrub the scrubber with my hands. I then had to use it to pick at the toilet again. In the end, no one noticed, but I always remembered that cleaning the tray in someone else's house is a bad idea.
A new friend at high school invited me to stay over at his house. I got there and the place was just a house of horrors. It was filthy and reeked of something. His brother and sister-in-law moved in and took his bedroom, and it was pretty much just a bed surrounded by shelves of reptile enclosures.
The smell there was overwhelming. In the kitchen, I was introduced to "Frank". He was a thin, pale, balding, shirtless man sitting on a milk crate in front of a computer that was on a desk also made of milk crates, next to an army cot that was next to the back door. They told me he was "living off the grid".
I didn’t have the courage to say, "He's living in your kitchen". The mom apparently sleeps on the couch because she and the dad weren’t on speaking terms. There were at least eight cats, one of them ate pizza crust out of my hand and I wondered if they got fed regularly. I started to wonder where we were going to be sleeping.
He said, "Well, I usually sleep in this recliner, so you can have the other one". The recliner was about 30+ years old. The red fabric on the arms was almost black from the oil from people's skin seeping into it for decades.
To sleep on the floor would be even worse because the carpet had worn trails through it from where people walked, and the rest had a layer of dust, cat hair, and many other things on it. This was when my brain started working on overdrive to find a means of escape while maintaining civility.
I formulated some vague excuse and walked several miles home in the dark. He never spoke to me again.
In college, I went to this girl's house during a free period with six or seven friends. We arrive, and she opens the door, says hello to her father, and immediately disrobed down to her bra and panties in the living room. We spent 45 minutes hanging out with her and her dad, and the whole time she was walking around in basically nothing.
I asked her dad about it at a different time, and he nonchalantly said she's always done this and acted like it was a completely normal thing to do.
As a 12-year-old, we moved to a small town from our cattle property to go to high school. I didn’t know anyone at school until the weird kid befriended me and invited me over one day. When we got there, her mom was slightly sloshed and called us into her bedroom.
We went in, and her mom was lying on a single bed, and there was a double-sized one in there that we both lounged on. Then, her mom started crying. The girl told me her dad passed about six months prior. Her mom started telling me how he had a drinking problem.
They had gone to bed one night, and he was spooning her when he passed in his sleep with his arms wrapped around her. But that wasn't the most horrifying part. Because she was inebriated too, she didn’t wake up until quite late and his body had started to have rigor mortis.
She realized and started screaming. The daughter ran in, the dad was gone and the mom was stuck in his arms. They had to call the authorities to help because she couldn’t get out. Meanwhile, I was sitting on the bed where he’d passed and they had never changed the sheets or covers; they smelled musty.
No wonder the girl acted weird, they both really needed therapy.
I went to one of my best friend's girlfriend's house for some R&R. She was always a dominant person who humiliated this guy, all the time. I never said anything, but his family and other friends always did. He decided to break up with her suddenly the day I was there. Her response was deranged, to say the least.
She cut his SUV's tire and set it on fire using kerosene. He tried to stop her and her dog bit his stomach. I ran into the house to bring the fire extinguisher and her mom fought with me, thinking something else was going on.
I managed to push her dog away, put the fire out, and drive off with my friend. We went straight to the hospital, with one wheel that had a badly cut tire and no air. I can’t help but wonder what is wrong with people.
In college, my friend and I wanted to go to a festival that happened to be just a few blocks away from my friend's parent's house, so they invited us to stay the night. My friend was into reptiles, and it turned out, so were their parents. Their home was unlike anything I'd ever seen before.
Almost every room, except for the kitchen, had a reptile enclosure in it. I had to use the restroom after the drive from campus, so they told me I could use the one on the first floor. It was an older house, and for whatever reason, the bathroom was huge.
I set up shop, only to notice one wall was completely taken up by a massive enclosure for their boa constrictor, and a bright blue kiddy pool sat at the far end of the bathroom. I was peeking in the constrictor enclosure, trying to spot her, when the kiddy pool began to move towards me with a repeated “THUMP, THUMP, THUMP”.
I was mid-deposit, staring at this encroaching pool with increasing concern as it kept getting closer and closer. With a final “THUMP” the pool was close enough that I could see over the lip. Inside was a little, grumpy tortoise. I watched it lean back a little, tuck its head in, then bash the side of the pool with its shell, scooting the whole thing forward an inch or so.
He kept moving the pool until it was up against my foot. Then, the tortoise just repeatedly bashed the side of the pool in rapid succession. When I got up to wash my hands, the tortoise changed directions to THUMP after me to the sink.
When I got out and told my friend, they said, "Oh yeah, that's Ted. My parents probably haven't given him his salad and sun time yet and he's cranky”.
I was hitchhiking in upstate NY when I was in my early twenties. Some nice people offered to take me home and give me a ride to Syracuse in the morning. When I got to their house, the first thing anyone said to me was, "I take it's been a while since you've been able to shave".
The same dude tried explaining to me that I was hitchhiking because I was sad and that I was sad because I hadn't had enough lovin’. I played dumb and let him talk in circles. There were 10–15 adults and children living there and two different dogs that had just had litters.
I took a shower and was scooping puppies out of the tub the whole time. When it was time to pass out, someone took me upstairs to sleep in a spare room. While we were walking up the stairs, he handed me a bottle of Febreze over his shoulder and said, "You're gonna want this". I gave him a look of utter confusion.
He continued, “There's some kinda deceased animal trapped in the wall and we haven't been able to find it, but we can smell it. One of the cats is missing...so".
The highlight of the whole fiasco was a Home Depot shopping cart in the kitchen that was overflowing with Mountain Dew cans with a chainsaw sticking—blade up—in the middle of it. They told me to come back and work apple harvest with them but I never did.
I met up with this guy to go on our first date and ended up back at his house, which he shared with his parents. As soon as I stepped through the door, the smell of animal poo hit me like a brick. I held my breath and entered the lounge, where there was trash and boxes stacked as high as the ceiling. Even in this dude’s room, there were boxes and garbage.
They had about ten cats running around, five hamsters—pretty sure one of them was no longer alive in the cage—three birds all cooped up in one small bird cage, three dogs, and an iguana. I never saw him again after I made my excuses and left. I blocked the dude’s number and blocked and deleted him from all my socials.
I was at my girlfriend’s and we weren't doing very well in the relationship. We were sitting in her car while we talked about how the relationship wasn't the same as before and how we weren't really feeling like it was going anywhere. It was the regular talk before a breakup, pretty tense and kind of sad. We noticed that the bathroom window was open.
So, we lowered our voices as we didn't want her family to hear us talking about breaking up. She was about to cry when we heard a massive, compressed expulsion of gas echo through the confines of the porcelain toilet. The atmosphere changed entirely. We tried not to laugh, but it was impossible not to.
Her mom called out to her with doubt as she asked her name. We rushed out of the car and proceeded to laugh ourselves silly. That day, whatever her mom ate before laying the log saved our relationship; we didn't break up until a few months later.
When I was about 23, I decided to reconnect with an old friend from middle school. He had gotten married, had a one-year-old kid, and lived not too far from me. So, he invited me over one night to catch up and have a drink. I got over to his place and there were a few other people there I didn’t know—two guys who were his friends, and some girl who was a friend of his wife’s.
Everything was going fine for a while until everyone started randomly doing illicit substances on a Wednesday night, except for me and my friend’s wife. All this while the baby was just right there chilling in the playpen. A while later, the wife’s friend started freaking out.
She was making no sense and threatening to jab my friend and the baby, yelling at the top of her lungs. I don’t know if it was PTSD, a psychotic break, or what, but it was scary. My friend eventually managed to push her out the front door and yelled, “Get out of our house!"
Not even ten seconds later, the glass window next to the front door shattered, and I saw her bloody leg blasting through it. The girl was punching, and screaming while broken glass was flying everywhere. My friend’s wife grabbed the baby, called the authorities, and headed out the back door.
Officers eventually got there, put her in handcuffs and she went off to the pokey. It was one heck of a reunion and was probably the last time I saw that friend.
When I was in middle school, I went to a friend’s early one Saturday. I went grocery shopping with her, her sister, and her mom. We got back, and there were a bunch of grocery bags waiting in the garage by the door. My friend told me to go in. I didn't want to because her dad was home and I hadn’t met him yet, but my friend insisted it was fine.
I went in from the garage door and when I looked directly to the right in the kitchen, her dad was cooking something on the stove...In only his tighty whities. I don't remember which curse word he yelled, but I immediately went back out the way I came. I can only imagine the face I was making.
Somehow, my friend convinced me to still stay the night, but I was deeply embarrassed and avoided her father.
When I was in high school, my dad's coworker had a photography business on the side. He agreed to take my senior year photos for a great price. My dad only knew this man professionally. He seemed totally normal—married with a wife and kids in the suburbs. Boy, were we wrong.
This man also said that we could have lunch before the session, so my mom, dad, siblings, and I showed up at this man’s house. Every wall was covered in paintings of women in the buff. I don't think there was an inch of empty space. They were not Renaissance or tasteful paintings.
There was one with a woman on a throne made of swords in a leather jacket and another of a woman riding a tiger. I never saw one family photo. He gave us a tour of the whole house, saying that these paintings were "one of a kind" or "first editions".
He even showed us some of his work of his kid’s adult babysitter, unclothed in a field. All of it was super creepy. On the way back home, I remember as soon as the car door shut, I screamed, and my dad was like, "I swear I had NO IDEA. He seemed like a normal guy".
We went to a classmate's house to do our film class project. He said that since we were making a horror film, we could try filming in the dark storage space above the dining room. So, he climbed up there to get some establishing pictures, but as soon as he crawled in, disaster struck.
We found out the ceiling wasn't made of concrete and he ended up breaking the ceiling and falling down. Luckily he wasn't hurt, but now there was a big human-sized hole in the ceiling. Needless to say, his parents were furious and we had to change our filming location to my aunt's condo.
When I was 18, I was with my childhood best friend at her fiancé’s family’s home for the week. It was me, my friend, her fiancé, his parents, his younger brother, his sister, and the sister’s son, who was nine. The first night I was there, I was using the bathroom. Just as I was standing up, I heard a strange noise coming from a cabinet in there.
I saw the nine-year-old boy with the cabinet door cracked open, watching me use the bathroom. He had this creepy smile on his face. I was shocked for a moment and told him to get out. He did, not saying a word, just watching me with that same weird grin.
Over the next two days, he repeatedly found ways to catch me when I was indisposed—showering, changing, in the bathroom, or anything along those lines. He did everything from peeking under doors to hiding in closets to putting things in doors, so they didn’t fully lock to taking a compact mirror from his mom and slipping it under my door.
I had to start checking for him hiding in any room I was in, and if I had to use a bathroom in the house that didn’t lock, I had my friend stand guard. I immediately told my friend and her fiancé after the first incident. When the boy did it again, her fiancé was angry on my behalf and talked to his parents and his sister about it, but they didn’t seem surprised or bothered by that information.
They just shrugged it off like it was a perfectly normal thing and said they would try to keep an eye on him. They didn’t. The last straw was on the second night. I found him in my room next to my bed watching me sleep and I knew fully well I had locked my door. He never said a word.
He just watched me with that same grin that honestly spooked me. I ended up sleeping on the floor in my friend’s and her fiancé’s room that night. Apart from my friend, her fiancé, and his younger brother, everyone else in the house just acted like it was normal.
I ended up finding somewhere else to stay for night three, then leaving the trip early. I couldn’t take being around him with that stare, having to constantly be on guard, and having my privacy invaded. That little kid still creeps me out when the memory comes to mind.
A buddy and I were walking down the street and noticed a plastered guy bothering a woman outside a store. We stopped to help, and so did some guy in an army jacket. Soon after, officers came by to deal with the sloshed guy, and the Army guy invited us over to have a brew. We were about 14 or so at the time, so we said sure!
We got to his apartment and he gave us a drink each and showed us his big dagger. He told us how to gouge out eyes and how to paralyze someone. He then proceeded to demonstrate on me a choke move he was taught, which hurt. My friend had the blade in hand just in case the Army guy didn't let go.
After I was freed and able to breathe, we peaced out of there FAST. The longer we sat there, the more frightened I was getting.
There was a younger guy we worked with. We went to his place for birthday drinks, which was cool, but all his friends were still 17 years old, while we were in our mid-20s. What was meant to be a quiet night for me escalated quickly.
Despite having the intention to drive home after two drinks, I got so plastered that another friend of mine had to take me back to his house to crash. A couple of hours later, I woke up with the most immense need to pee in my life. So, I got out of this pink bed and waltzed into the hallway.
I had never been in this house before, so I didn’t have a clue where anything was. I was told his parents were asleep next to the room. I did my best, half stumbling and falling over everywhere, trying to find a toilet. At that point, I was in so much pain from holding back my need to go.
Finally, I saw what must be the bathroom at the end of another hallway, only to find that the door was locked! There was no one in there, the toilet was simply locked. I went back and forth through this whole house twice, with a severe need to pee. Every room was locked, and no lights were turning on.
So here I was, trying to be quiet, in what I'm starting to assume is a house I might not suppose to be in. I decided to go in the yard. However, all the doors and windows to get outside were locked from the key barrel, and all the keys had been removed. I couldn’t even go outside!
I didn’t want to be disrespectful and pee in the kitchen sink, so I went back into the sister's supposed room in the hopes I could MacGyver my way to bladder release. There it was—an empty soft drink bottle. It came out so hard, I nearly dropped the bottle, and almost filled this thing to the brim. Eventually, my bladder was empty and the bottle was full.
I replaced the cap and called it a night. I woke up to a grown man I'd never seen before staring at me with the door wide open. We made prolonged eye contact, and he then continued down the hallway. I heard him say something along the lines of, "I have no idea who that guy is". He was followed by two or three tradesmen behind him.
I started thinking, “What have I gotten myself into??" I stood up, got my pants on, and as my pants were buckling, a girl appeared who was not overly pleased with me exiting what I assumed was her bed. I said sorry, grabbed my pee bottle, and walked out. There was my mate simply having breakfast in the dining area.
After some bacon and a laugh, I found out the house was undergoing extensive renovations.
When I was eight, I slept over at a friend’s house. For dinner they had pancakes. Everyone ate together. After I put the syrup on my pancakes, I was scolded by the dad for using too much syrup. I then noticed everyone at the table only put a tablespoon on their pancakes. But that wasn't the weirdest part.
After I ate the pancakes, they took my plate and tried to pour the unused syrup back into the container.
I remember when I was a kid, we went to friends of our family's for dinner—and it went SO wrong. The husband and wife got into a very loud screaming match over whether to serve creamed corn or frozen corn. I'm talking they were in each other's faces and being shrilly loud.
Ten-year-old me was fascinated by how such a mundane object could arouse such passions, and of course, I wanted to see how it turned out. However, we were instead quickly ordered into the car and left. I still can never understand how corn caused such a disagreement. I found out later that they got divorced.
When I was about six or seven, I went over to my friend’s house one afternoon to try out their new PlayStation. They had JUST come out around then, and we weren’t very well off, so it was a big deal. His older brother, who was about 16 or 17, came in and took the controller from me, and sat down in front of me, blocking the TV. This was not unusual; he was awful.
My buddy started to yell at him, and the older brother was laughing. Then his eyes rolled back into his head, and he fell back into my lap, convulsing and foaming at the mouth, having a seizure. I froze. I couldn't do anything. I just stared down at his face in my lap.
His mom ran in screaming and ushered us out while she called for help. Obviously, I went home. My mom wouldn't let me go see my friend after that, but I just wanted to make sure he was okay. A couple of weeks later, they moved back to California. I did get to say goodbye to my buddy, but I never saw him again.
One time when I was 12, I went to a sleepover and the mom was there the whole time. I don't just mean in the house doing her own thing, I mean she had a sleeping bag out on the living room floor with all of us. It was the most awkward sleepover I've ever been to. The worst part was the girl didn't even think it was weird.
We also had to go to bed at 8:00 PM!
I met a nice couple at work, and they invited me and my fiance at the time for dinner. The dinner was typical, but two more couples showed up as it ended, and they wanted us to stick around for “other activities”. Apparently, they thought the way to convince us to join their partner-swapping group was to sneak up on us with it. We politely declined.
I was really into this girl and trying to get on her good side. I can't remember why, but we stopped by her house to get something. We walked in through the side door and I noticed that all the lights were off. This was unusual since I thought I saw her dad's car in the driveway. I stared into the kitchen and I saw candles lit all romantic-like.
I grabbed her and said, "We gotta leave right now". She was annoyed and asked why. Just then, on cue, her dad's girlfriend lets out the loudest moan from upstairs. She grabbed my arm and shuddered in horror as we left.
When I was at university, I used to work a bit as a DJ. I got booked to play a warmup set at a club in a neighboring city but didn't have a car. I was only getting paid £40 ($50) for the set and didn't want to spend my whole fee getting home. A taxi would have cost around that much, and there were no buses or trains running at that time.
After the set, I made it my mission to find somewhere to crash for free. I got talking to this random dude at the club, and he was super friendly. He not only offered to sell me some illicit substances but also said I could stay the night on his couch. It was literally the ideal outcome for me.
So, we headed back to his house. I crawled into my sleeping bag, which I had brought with me just in case, and passed out. At around 5:30 AM, I was woken up by the sound of some people entering the room. I was still in a bit of a sleepy haze, but I very clearly heard someone shout, "What the heck?!”
Before I knew what was happening, I was being yanked up off the sofa, still trapped in my sleeping bag. I was suddenly nose-to-nose with this dude, who was demanding to know who I was and why I was asleep on their sofa. It turned out the guy was another housemate who thought I was homeless and had broken into their house to sleep.
I hastily explained the situation, and we realized he'd just come from the same club that I had been DJing at and had actually enjoyed my set. The guy let me go and we sat down and shared a couple of incredibly tense minutes while I waited for the first bus back to my town. I'm pretty sure that's the closest I ever came to being stomped out by a stranger.
When I was five, I went to a birthday party that was a drop-off. There were no parents tagging along, and the house was filled with the classmate’s family members, which included 50 little kids. It was legit incredible...until we went to play in the basement.
His grandpa was there, chopping a whole roasted pig on the floor—apple in the mouth and all. All the kids were OK with it, but as a child that had never seen or experienced a pig roast, it was disturbing.
When I was 14, I went to a friend’s house for a birthday party sleepover. There were five other girls invited. After dinner, we settled in the lounge room to watch horror movies. Her parents came in and sat on the couch, and proceeded to get super high. They started commentating on the movie as we watched it like it was a live sports event.
This was the first time any of us girls had seen an illicit substance. It was so weird, and the birthday girl was so embarrassed. We never went back to her house for a sleepover after that one.
When I was about 10, my cousins and I were sleeping at my grandma's house in Oklahoma. My uncle Rick came home trashed and got loud, so my grandma started yelling at him and hitting him with a rolled-up magazine.
My other uncle Cecil, who was only four years older than us, told us three kids to run out the back door and "hide at the creek 'cause Rick’s a mean drinker". It was about midnight and we ran down to the creek and stood around looking at each other for about 10 minutes and then we walked back.
We came in through the front door with muddy feet and leaves in our hair. Uncle Rick had already gone to bed and my grandma yelled at us, asking why we were outside. We said we were hiding at the creek. She asked us who told us to hide at the creek. We all pointed at Uncle Cecil who was in the corner laughing.
She started chasing him around the table and beating him with a magazine. He was hiding his face yelling, "OW, OW, OW" like he was in pain, but I could see he was still laughing. We all ran to the bedroom, jumped in bed, and pulled the covers over our heads until it got quiet and we went to sleep.
I went to a girl’s house; it was the second time we were hanging out. We were getting a little frisky, but she decided she didn’t want to go all the way yet, which was perfectly fine. We went to meet her friends and get some food, then went back to her place and started drinking.
One of her friends wanted to go buy weed, so we hopped in the car. The girl I was seeing had to pee, so they pulled over, and she peed on her neighbor's sidewalk. We got back to her house, and she started screaming outside and being extra rowdy.
She was making bird noises, staring at me, being confrontational, and asking me if I was having fun. Then, she told me to cover my ears and ripped the loudest, wettest blast of gas. She laughed, then did it again. She was visibly upset at the fact that I was getting a little turned off by her, so she went inside all pouty.
I went to comfort her and acted like everything was fine and normal. Her friends came inside and drank some more. She pulled me upstairs, stumbling, now wanting to go all the way, but couldn’t consent because she was trashed and said she felt sick.
I told her I was going to go home, and she started acting like a child, making me feel extremely uncomfortable begging me to stay, and blaming me for thinking she was too weird. I finally left and she bombarded my phone, gaslighting me, saying that I couldn’t handle her weirdness.
I was like “you peed on your neighbor's sidewalk, passed wind three times, and were making me uncomfortable—sorry but you’re not what I’m looking for” and that was that.
When I was in college, there was a guy named Scott who lived with his mother and was desperate to leave and move in with me. When I was helping him move, his mom lit up, which I ignored. Then, she tried to grab my crotch. "CAREFUL!" Scott shouted. "My mom is a creep!" Over the years, that has been a meme for me.
In college, I drank WAY too much. One weekend, a friend invited a group of us to go ice fishing and then stay the night at his parents’ house. I became black-out trashed, and in the morning, I woke up in his childhood bedroom, which still had old toys, silly wallpaper, and rocketship blankets. It was so surreal.
I sat there for what felt like forever, terrified, desperately trying to remember where I was and how I got there. It's one of only a few times I've legitimately panicked.
I was drinking around a fire pit in a friend's backyard. The dogs started barking at something on the other side of the fence; it was a skunk. My friend’s husband was plastered and decided he really wanted to get rid of the skunk. Everyone was trying to talk him out of it and told him to leave it alone, but he didn’t listen.
The husband went into the house and grabbed a crossbow. This dude is trashed, mad, and holding a loaded crossbow with about five people, including his wife, standing between him and the skunk, pleading with him to settle down. Eventually, we settled him down, and he acted like a grumpy inconsolable child for the rest of the night.
We found out later that before he came back out of the house, he had misfired the crossbow into his own bedroom floor.
As a child, a friend invited me over to see her cat’s kittens. I rode my bike and when I got to her house, we were happily playing with the kittens when her dad walked in. He was only wearing tightie-whities that were not at all white, he smelled terrible, and was carrying an acoustic guitar.
He yelled at us to turn off the TV because he wrote a new song he wanted to play and we had to dance. My friend and her sister seemed like this was normal, so I sat there for about five minutes listening to him, watching them dance, then said I had to go.
He got irritated and said if I wanted to feel the music, I could snort his Kool-Aid powder—which he demonstrated. I had seen enough after-school specials, so I bolted and ran out the door. I couldn’t get my bike unlocked, so I just left it and ran home crying.
I told my mom a weird man without any clothes on was singing to me and wanted me to snort Kool-Aid. I wasn’t allowed over there ever again. My dad went to get my bike after he got off work and had words with my friend’s dad.
I was around 10 when I went to a friend’s house for a birthday party. She was walking a few of us around the house showing us stuff because her parents were artists and she had a lot of cool things. Around every corner or so—down the stairs, hall, around a column, in the bathroom—there was a small, black and white hand-drawn picture of a bare woman.
No one said anything, but we gave each other looks. It was just slightly weird until we got to the basement. It was a rectangular room with hundreds of paintings and drawings of an unclothed woman in various poses. They ranged in size from 4x6 to huge. Some were black and white and some were in color, and they had LOTS of detail.
The room had no furniture except for three or four of those big lights they use in films and a red couch with a blanket draped over it. We just stared in silence until someone asked what was going on and she goes, “Oh, it’s just my mom. My dad likes to draw her”.
My mom wouldn’t let me go over anymore after I told her about the drawings. It took me a few years to realize they were producing videos down there too.
When I was 16, a friend of mine made friends with some Ukrainian immigrants. They were renting out an apartment in the complex that my friend lived in. One night, we were at their apartment, drinking and playing cards. I had access to Bluetooth and was playing music.
After a few songs, “Du Hast” by Rammstein began playing. A few moments later, one of the Ukrainians did the unthinkable: He pulled out a piece. He laid it on the table while asking me, “What do you know about Rammstein?"
I quickly tried to say, “I just love rock music," all the while feeling the adrenaline literally pumping through my veins. After some incoherent Slavic words, I pulled an Irish exit and never saw them again. Shortly after that, my friend had informed me that their visas expired and they were sent back to Ukraine.
When I was 14 years old, I was hanging out at a buddy’s house with some friends. His parents worked a lot, so they were never home. My buddy decided to get a snake. It was a two-foot-long ball python he kept in a pillowcase. He was hiding it from his parents, but let it roam free with us most of the time.
One day, his mom came home early and we saw her pull in the driveway. We were in the living room with the snake. He scooped it up, put it in the pillowcase, and took off running for his room. Unfortunately, the snake decided that that was a good time to release its bowels.
Snake poo looks like toothpaste, so there was a long trail of snake poo across the hardwood floor. His mom walked in and noticed the line of white fluid. She asked what it was, so naturally, we said we had no clue. She scraped a bit up with her finger and smelled it. We were nearly about to burst with laughter.
She said it didn’t really smell like anything. We were just like, "Yeah we have no idea, a food bowl must have leaked or something". She then tasted the bit on her finger and we lost it. We ran out the door into the yard and down the street while laughing uncontrollably. She called us dorks and cleaned up the "food" mess.
He sold the snake a month later and never got caught. We never forgot that tasting.
It was the first time I ever slept over at a friend's house; I was in kindergarten or first grade. When it was bedtime, his parents gave us empty cups with removable caps on them. I asked my friend what they were for, and his response floored me.
He said they were for peeing. Apparently, his parents didn't like the idea of their kids wandering around the house at night to go to the bathroom, so we peed in cups and emptied them in the toilet in the morning.
When I was about eight years old, I went to a sleepover, and they fed me a mayonnaise sandwich. It was literally bread with just a glop of mayonnaise inside while the other kids got McDonald’s. They also kept insulting my parents, telling me how poor I was, and kept implying that my parents used illicit substances.
I ended up getting so mad at the dad I stood up on a chair and screamed that he was fat and ugly, then walked home. The next day, they showed up at my door yelling, claiming I took the dad’s ID and told all the parents from the sleepover not to invite me to their houses because I was a thief.
They never apologized after they found the ID either. I later found out they were feuding before I went there because the wife tried to sleep with my dad when we first moved in. Still, my parents didn’t want that to get in the way of my and their daughter’s friendship.
A new kid moved into my neighborhood, so my buddy and I went to introduce ourselves. Eventually, we became friends, and we hung out most of the time at my buddy’s house because he had a pool and all the video games. One day, we decided to go to the new kid’s house to hang out. The moment we walked in, I was swarmed with fleas. Not a couple—I was covered.
I could see them jumping around on and climbing walls; the house was infested. I tried to ignore it and pushed to go outside, but no one wanted to. After 30 minutes to an hour, we moved from the Xbox to the PC, which was upstairs. We walked into the room where his computer was located and, again, were swarmed by fleas.
On top of being swarmed by fleas, his mom and stepdad were sleeping with one another in their room, which was located next to the room we were in. Shortly after that, I made an excuse that I needed to be home for dinner. Once I got home, I decided to never call and hang out with him again.
A few days later, after my buddy and I ghosted the new kid, his mom came over to my buddy’s house screaming while banging on the front door, trying to force us to hang out with her son. We called the authorities and she was taken into custody. After her release, they packed up and moved to a different state within a day.
I never talked to him again.
When I was around nine, I went over to a new friend's house to play video games. I walked in, and within a minute, my friend hocked up a nice loogie and launched it on the carpet. I paused but didn’t say anything. Twenty minutes later, he did it again right onto his living room carpet.
I asked my friend what he was doing, and he looked at me like, “What are you talking about?" I asked him about the loogies and he said, “Yeah, I do it all the time. What’s the problem?" I asked him if his parents let him do that, and of course, his dad walked in. It was the first time I met him.
He introduced himself, and then he did the same thing, right on the carpet. I was dumbfounded. It was so gross, and I still don’t know what to think of it to this day.
When I was in high school, these guys invited my buddy and me over to light up with a water pipe one of the guys had made. They kept it up in the attic; we figured they didn’t want his parents to smell the smoke. It worked great, and for a week, we’d meet up with them every afternoon.
Then after we had been hanging out one day, one of the guys said, “We better get going before the people who live here get home”. Apparently, it wasn’t the home of either guy. They’d just break into the house every day to use the attic.
I went to a friend's place for a sleepover. I was in the backyard, chilling with the guinea pigs while she was off doing something in the house. Then I heard screaming. Her sister and one of her brothers got into an argument. They cursed in a way my family would never tolerate, but at one point the sister's anger changed to something more panicked.
The brother apparently threw something, at which point the parents joined the screaming match. I didn't know what was going on at the time. All I heard was someone screaming and wondered if an ambulance was going to get involved. Even though the anger wasn't directed at me, I was scared and wanted to go home. I ended up staying the night anyway.
Things settled into a hesitant calm and I was worried about making things awkward or starting another argument if I asked my mom to pick me up early, so I pretended nothing happened.
My best friend and I had just gotten back from college and we were hanging out watching Netflix and drinking. Randomly, my friend’s mom came home plastered from some wine night with her friends and instantly went to her room. Ten minutes later, she came out with a bra and no panties and just sat down and started rambling.
It was very weird for my friend.
I once made the mistake of accepting an invite to the weird kid at school’s house because he said he had just bought GTA San Andreas. This kid’s parents would openly hock saliva on the floor/carpet of their house. But that wasn't the nastiest part!
Their toilet was broken, and when I told him I needed to go, he directed me to his backyard. There, his dad had dug a four-foot-deep hole that he and his family used as a washroom. Needless to say, I chose to wait until I got home.
When I was a kid—definitely less than 10 years old—I was sleeping over at a friend's house. I woke up in the middle of the night and just laid there for a few minutes. It was completely silent in the house. I suddenly had a tickle in my throat and lightly cleared it.
From all the way across the house, my friend's dad boomed, "WHO'S AWAKE?" He came into the living room extremely angry. I squeezed my eyes shut and was barely breathing until he left. It scared the life out of me.
I was on my way to a friend's apartment and he had another friend staying at his place for a couple of days. His friend was known to get crazy hilarious after a few drinks. So I approached the apartment, and I noticed something dangling from the balcony in the distance as he lived two floors up. I got closer.
It was his friend completely without clothing, hanging from the balcony and swinging about with one arm. I yelled to him, “Dude!! What are you doing?!!" He replied, “Huh? Umm…just hanging out. Just hanging...yeah”. He proceeded to climb back inside. When I got up to my friend’s place, he was already back in his clothes.
I’m like, ”What just happened?" They replied “Just a regular Monday”.
When I was working as a home health nurse, I went to see this old lady for the first time. She lived in a trailer in a run-down trailer park. When she let me in the house, EVERY surface was covered with sheets and blankets—all the furniture, walls, pictures, and even the kitchen counters.
I asked her if she was planning on having some painting done, but she said no, her son had done that. He was schizophrenic and was asleep in the back. I thought it best if I left before he woke up, so I noped out of there as soon as I could, and quit that job soon after.
When I was 16, I went for a sleepover at my friend’s house. She wasn’t so much a friend, more like someone my mom made me hang out with because she felt sorry for her. Before going to bed, my friend removed a few dirty dishes from it and pulled the covers down for me. I almost started screaming.
The bed was full of freshly trimmed toenail clippings all through it. I decided to top and tail with my friend instead, then at 5 AM, her dad burst in the door in only his underwear to yell at her about a chore she’d forgotten to do. I had my own car, so I got ready to leave at that point, and she offered me breakfast.
She went into the cupboard—not the fridge—and brought out a bowl of uncovered, leftover chicken green Thai curry. No thanks.
When I was in middle school, I was the assigned “buddy” for a new girl at the school. We had struck up a friendship and I spent the day hanging out with her, another friend, her older brother, and her mom at an amusement park. It was supposed to be a sleepover. The brother gave off consistently weird vibes, but I ignored them because I didn’t want to hurt the girl’s feelings.
The other friend was smarter than me and, when we left the amusement park, went home instead of spending the night. That night, her brother chased us around with a butcher blade and we had to barricade ourselves in her bedroom, while her mother debated calling the authorities. She didn’t, so we stayed locked in her room all night, starving.
He banged on the door for a while before eventually passing out. Apparently, this was a fairly “common occurrence” and he was supposed to be on some type of medication that he was currently off of. She even had an escape route out of that room for when she felt like he may bust in. Sadly, we didn’t continue that friendship.
I was at a sleepover at my friend's. They were a family of six—two adults and four kids—and they had run out of toilet paper. There was a 7-Eleven and several other stores mere blocks away, but they employed the family towel instead. There was a towel with poop stains tacked to the wall.
I held my pee all night until I nearly got a kidney infection the next morning. I called my dad to get me as early in the morning as I could.
I went to a friend's house when I was around 10 years old to play with a couple of other friends. Her younger brother made the worst mistake. He forgot to shut the baby gate when we went to the basement. As soon as we were all in the basement, her baby brother fell down the stairs while he was in his walker.
It was one of the scariest things I've ever seen. I was sure that he had lost his life, especially since it took a good five seconds before he started crying.
It’s true what they say: money makes the world go round. In order to succeed in this life, you need to have a good grasp of key financial concepts. That’s where Moneymade comes in. Our mission is to provide you with the best financial advice and information to help you navigate this ever-changing world. Sometimes, generating wealth just requires common sense. Don’t max out your credit card if you can’t afford the interest payments. Don’t overspend on Christmas shopping. When ordering gifts on Amazon, make sure you factor in taxes and shipping costs. If you need a new car, consider a model that’s easy to repair instead of an expensive BMW or Mercedes. Sometimes you dream vacation to Hawaii or the Bahamas just isn’t in the budget, but there may be more affordable all-inclusive hotels if you know where to look.
Looking for a new home? Make sure you get a mortgage rate that works for you. That means understanding the difference between fixed and variable interest rates. Whether you’re looking to learn how to make money, save money, or invest your money, our well-researched and insightful content will set you on the path to financial success. Passionate about mortgage rates, real estate, investing, saving, or anything money-related? Looking to learn how to generate wealth? Improve your life today with Moneymade. If you have any feedback for the MoneyMade team, please reach out to [email protected]. Thanks for your help!
The Moneymade team
If you like humaverse you may also consider subscribing to these newsletters: