The Best Revenges
Is there anything more satisfying than getting revenge on someone who really deserves it? From getting even with nasty bosses, cheating exes, or nosy neighbors who can’t mind their own business, these stories from Reddit and Quora prove that dishing out payback is a true art form.
1. No Reservations
Years ago, I was checking into the Hyatt Regency in Kansas City after a long, hot summer day. There was a 4-H convention also checking in, so there was a long line with young kids, many of whom hadn’t been at a hotel before. That seemed like a perfect time to be patient and not worry about how long it was taking to check in.
After about 15 minutes, I was next in line. Then it happened. A super-arrogant businessman, his entourage included, cut in front of me. The young desk agent didn’t know what to do and looked back at me in horror. I just shrugged a “no worries” shrug and she mouthed “thank you” and she started to check him in.
But then he turned and smirked at me. Big mistake. As he finished checking in, he screamed at the girl to confirm his dinner reservations at the fancy revolver restaurant at the top of the hotel. He said he had a group of 12 very important business prospects and insisted she reconfirm.
She did—everything was set for that evening at 7:00 pm. As he left he gave me one more smirk. I knew just what to do. I checked-in without further incident. I went to my room, unpacked, then called the revolver restaurant and canceled his reservation.
Just before 7:00 I went to the restaurant to watch. It was predictable. They didn’t have a table and he exploded at everyone in sight. His business contacts were horrified at his behavior…I doubt he was going to get the business. But here’s the kicker. He caught sight of me out of the corner of his eye.
I was just getting in the elevator to go back to my room. As the door was closing, I gave him my very best smirk and then disappeared.
2. “I’ll Be Right Back”
There was a really beautiful, popular girl my friend Mike had a serious crush on. He asked her out several times but she was always “busy”. She never really discouraged him though, as I think she liked the attention.
One day Mike got a hold of two tickets to a sold-out U2 concert. He bought them from a friend who had to go out of town for an emergency. Mike immediately called the girl of his dreams and of course she accepted. He was thrilled and everything seemed fine.
The night of the concert they’re at the arena waiting for the show to begin and she suddenly says, “Oh, I see my friend, I’ll be right back!” You guessed it, she never returned. It gets worse. Mike stayed at the seats since that’s the only place she would logically look for him. When the show ended, Mike, ever the gentleman, waited for a long time so he could drive her home. But saw no sign of her.
She didn’t answer her phone or texts. So he left feeling so hurt. By the next morning he was rightfully mad! She called him around noon apologizing and saying she ran into her ex. They had a long talk and worked out a lot of stuff and lost track of time. She had actually missed the concert and blah, blah, blah.
He accepted her apology and asked if they could try again. She accepted and told him how very nice and forgiving he was. But she had majorly underestimated him. The next Saturday evening he took her to a very expensive seafood restaurant about an hour up the coast.
He was polite and chatty the whole way up there. He made the reservation in her name.They were seated, ordered a nice bottle of wine, some expensive appetizers and entrees, then Mike excused himself to go to the men’s room. He very deliberately said, “I’ll be right back”.
He walked out to the parking lot and drove away. And became the hero of every good guy who’s been treated like dirt by a girl because she just didn’t care about his feelings. I still love that story.
3. What A Rebound
My wife of 30 years decided to divorce me to become an intern in Washington DC. No reason, just wanted the divorce. When I asked her how long she had wanted to leave, she said “the last ten years”.
When I asked her why she would wait for 10 years of her life, she replied, “Because I wanted to wait until you made enough money that I could live comfortably on my half”. True story. Ten years.
About three weeks after she moved out, I met a 24-year-old woman with a “daddy complex”. Beautiful. A pole dancer and model. I got more action in a week than I did the last ten years of my marriage.
The girl actually fell in love with me. Unfortunately, she was my ex-wife’s best friend’s daughter. It drove my ex-wife, and the friend, totally insane. It drove my ex to marry a guy 16 years younger than her, “Just to know I could do it”, she said.
Another divorce for her. I bought my obligatory two motorcycles and traveled the world with this young girl. I finally had the life I dreamed about as a kid. Eventually, the issue of marriage came up and I had to bail.
A 32-year difference in age was just too much to overcome. Afterward, I dated 72 women before meeting my current wife, a fantastic woman. All through this time, my ex was miserable as she watched me earn back the money she took several times over and saw me happy as a clam.
I sent her a card thanking her for divorcing me and allowing me to finally have a happy life. She is still a miserable chunk of protoplasm.
4. Frequent Flier
I am a frequent flier, but at this time in my career, I wasn’t getting frequent upgrades to business class. I prefer the aisle seats, and was settling in for a long flight across the country, when a very annoyed woman informed me that I was sitting in her aisle seat.
I was embarrassed after taking a look at my boarding pass and seeing that I actually had been assigned a middle seat. Middle seats are the worst seats on the plane. You play elbow jockey with not one but two people in your row, and you still have to ask permission from the person in the aisle to use the restroom.
It’s a crummy way to take a long flight. I apologized and took my proper seat. As she sat down, she said something to me like “I bet you wish you were in the aisle seat”. I replied sheepishly that I probably did.
She went on to say that she was a frequent flier and only sits in aisle seats. I mumbled something in semi-polite response, but it was clear she was gloating. But I got her so good. All of a sudden, in what seemed like perfect timing that only happens in a movie, a gate agent magically appeared in our row looking for me.
She asked me if I would be interested in an upgrade to business class. With a look of unbridled joy on my face, I responded “Why yes thank you, I would love an upgrade to business class”.
I gathered my gear, pulled my carry-on luggage from the bin, and headed up to the front of the plane…but made sure to look back and wink at the woman in her aisle seat.
5. When The Tables Turn
In school last year, my cousin scored 85% grades while I got 80%. She always asked for my marks on every exam again and again just to tease me. She considered herself very intelligent. Whenever we messaged each other, she’d always remind me that her grades were higher than mine.
She told everyone else my marks just to show how intelligent she is, and how dull I am. Well, this year I scored 86% while she got 80%. I wanted to do the same thing she did with me…but I didn’t.
I don’t even mention it. I knew her marks, so I didn’t even ask her what they were. I decided not to make her feel guilty and embarrassed. Finally, one day she called me and said sorry for everything she did in the whole last year. That feeling was the “Best Revenge”.
6. Pay Your Dues
I was around 17, living on my own when I got a job as a waitress at a dumpy restaurant. The manager was a horrible man who would scream at and harass his staff.
One day, I watched while he screamed at this poor young waitress, reducing her to tears. I stood there calmly taking my break in the kitchen, eating a banana, looking at him and thinking what a jerk he was.
When he was done with her, he turned to me and made a filthy comment about young girls who liked bananas. To which I replied, “I quit. This is my notice”. He went really crazy then and told me to get out immediately.
I said I would leave as soon as he paid me for the time I had worked that I hadn’t been paid for yet, which was two weeks. He said he wasn’t paying me a penny and to get out. So I got out—and I sat on the front step in my uniform. Whenever a customer came up to the door, I related what a terrible person he was and the things he said to me, plus how he treated the staff.
After a little while, he came out and screamed he was calling the authorities if I didn’t leave. I said go ahead, I’ll tell them what you said to me and how you treat the young girls here. He went back in, and came out 15 minutes later with a check. I said I want cash.
He went back inside and came back, very subdued and polite, and paid me cash. I got what was due to me. For a young girl on her own, having to deal with bad jobs and bad employers, it felt really good.
7. Fight Me, Bro
I was courting my wife-to-be and things were going fine. She worked in a bank and was very serious about her job, and she was courteous and polite to all customers.
One day she told me that a young man was flirting with her and she did not want to see him socially. He continued flirting and getting nowhere. So one evening I was with her brother in the local bar.
There was a loud commotion and someone was on the floor with some bruising, it seemed that he got into an altercation. He told his opponent that he knew karate. Before he could assume the stance, though his opponent clocked him with a roundhouse.
My girlfriend’s brother asked me if I knew the guy and I replied “no”. He then informed me that he was the guy who was giving his sister a hard time. So now I am thinking about this and considering my next move.
I went over to him, helped him up, and offered to take him to my place and get cleaned up. He accepted. After he was refreshed, I asked him if the fight was about a woman. He replied, “yes”. This presented me with an opportunity, not to get into a fight with him, but rather, get him to thinking.
I took out a picture of my girlfriend, put my arm around his shoulder, and explained that some wise guy was bothering her and that I wished I could get my hands on him for just a little while. Then I dropped him off at his car and wished him well.
Funny thing, I never saw him again, nor did my girlfriend. I felt good about doing a good deed.
8. Is This A New Flavor?
I was on the track team in middle school. Every day I would bring a Gatorade for myself to drink, and every single day this one jerk kid would open my Gatorade and drink half of it before I got any.
I asked him to stop but of course this was useless. So one day I decided to take revenge. I took an empty Gatorade bottle and filled it with dirty toilet water, then added food coloring to make it look like Gatorade.
At track practice that day, I put my drink where I always did and watched him walk over and take a drink of my dirty toilet water. He never said anything, but he also never drank my Gatorade again. It was definitely worth it.
9. There’s A Secret Ingredient
My husband of 14 years told me he was leaving, but he still lived in the house with me and our kids. Every day after telling me he was leaving, he’d come home from work, not even glance at me, change clothes, sit down at our computer and play computer games until dinner was ready…the dinner I HAD COOKED.
He’d walk through the front door like a king, surveying all he owned. He never spoke to me, never even acted as if I was even there. One day I’d had enough. While he was at work, I found his little tape recorder (his attorney had told him to record me any time I spoke to him) and boiled it.
It actually still looked the same, so I just put it back where I’d found it. I then cooked dinner but I separated mine and the kids’ dinner from his. His had extra ingredients, such as laxatives. A lot of laxatives. As we were all eating, he actually told me it tasted really good and got second helpings. I just said thank you.
10. Happy Ending
Some years ago, I was flying to California with my four-year-old son. We were seated behind a woman and her two young daughters. I noticed the woman was busily reading a paperback novel while her kids chatted.
Our flight landed in St Louis, where we were to wait about a half an hour or so before continuing on west. Passengers could debark if they desired. The woman and her two girls stood and started to leave. One girl asked her mother if they would have the same seats for the rest of the flight.
The woman turned, looked at my son, then at me and, with an awful sneer, replied, “I certainly hope not”. I was stunned. My son had slept most of the flight, had been otherwise quiet, and could not even reach her seat to kick it.
I simply could not understand the woman’s attitude. Anyway, I noticed she had left her novel in the seat-back pouch. I took it out and tore out the last six or so pages of the novel and then replaced it.
It was a stupid thing to do and I am not proud of my action, but from time to time I chuckle at the thought of that woman reaching the unexpected end of the novel and wonder if she ever realized that I was the culprit.
11. Thick Skull
Plain and simple. A grade 8 jerk had it out for me all year. He finally found a reason to call me out and challenge me to fight in front of dozens of classmates.
Despite my best efforts to talk him out of the fight, he insisted there was no getting out of it. He was significantly larger than me and I was taught to walk away from fights, not engage, despite being in various martial arts my entire life from age four onwards.
As I realized that the fight was inevitable, I told him he could have the first punch because I didn’t believe in starting it but I would finish it and he better make it count because it was his only free shot.
He went to punch me in the face and I ducked it. He hit me on the forehead and instantly recoiled in pain and backed off. The fight was over. I had won. The next day, my neck was a little sore but no other sign of an altercation on my end.
He on the other hand, had a spiral fracture running up his arm and two broken metacarpals in the hand that resulted in a cast up well past the elbow for the next six weeks or so as a reminder. He was also suspended from school and had to explain to his parents what had happened.
12. Clever Comeback
I once worked with a guy who was always talking about inappropriate things. One day he came into the room and said that the worst thing would be to wake up next to an ugly woman. I promptly replied (in front of two other female employees), “Worse than that would be waking up next to you”, as he was ugly himself. Crickets.
13. Smoothie Crook
I had a roommate for a short time who did her best to make me miserable. She would do things like take my soda out of my hand and dump it down the drain and tell me it was bad for my health. She also told me I wasn’t permitted to talk on the phone inside the house, and would take my clothes out of the dryer while they were still wet.
One day she told me I was lucky to be ugly because pretty women get harassed by men all the time and I would never have that problem. Well…what to do? I got a job in another town and prepared to move out.
I went and got a rental car, and while I was gone, she had a neighbor put her car in the driveway so I had to walk a block with boxes of things back and forth. What the heck?! This was the final straw. She went to walk her dog, and I just got angrier and angrier.
I was leaving! Why would she make it hard for me? Why? Because she was a mean-spirited, unhappy, nasty woman. I was trying to just leave, but she was deliberately putting obstacles in my way. So when I found my wet clothes on top of the dryer AGAIN, I was done.
I saw her blender. Every day she made a smoothie for breakfast. I took the container off the base, unscrewed the bottom, and removed the little rubber ring from the bottom of the container and then put it back together. I drove all the way to my new job with a secret smile, and that rubber ring on the gear shift.
I won’t say I’m exactly proud of this, but I’m not ashamed either. It was a small thing, but I’m sure it created a certain amount of havoc for her. It’s the little things.
14. The Poo York Times
I subscribed to my daily newspaper, and someone began systematically taking it from my driveway every morning before I went outside to get it. I finally set my alarm clock for a couple hours earlier than usual, got up, went outside, and picked up my newspaper before it had time to be stolen. The thief had no idea what was coming.
I carried it into my backyard, slid the paper out of its protective plastic baggie, and hid half a dozen of my Basset Hound’s freshest poops inside it. I then rolled it back up inside the baggie, set it back in my driveway, and went back to bed. This time I actually heard a car stop in front of my house for a few moments, and when I got back up again my newspaper was once again gone from where I had left it.
It was the last morning anyone took my paper.
15. I Brought Receipts
A neighbor who I never met accused me of trying to stab her dog through a double fence this winter. They have a wooden, six-foot stockade fence surrounded by a four-foot chain link fence. The dog was injured by something in their backyard and required several stitches, which resulted in a large vet bill that they couldn’t afford.
They concocted the story that their “animal hating” neighbor did this and began a fundraiser and raised quite a sum of money, way more than the bill was. I had no idea about this whole drama until a friend in the police department told me of what this whacko was accusing me of.
So once I found out, I requested a copy of the official report where the neighbor stated that the dog was hurt in their yard, that there wasn’t any blood or human footprints near the fence etc, and then I posted it to their fundraising site. She lost friends and her reputation for $400!
16. A Little Dust-Up
My ex-husband’s mother was one of those “a wife serves her husband and does everything” kind of people. She always criticized me. My housework, the meals I cooked etc. I decided to get even by filling a sock with the dust from my vacuum canister. Then, every day I’d stop by her house and take a moment to shake the sock around her house.
It left dust everywhere. The floors were the easiest. Everyone’s socks would get dirty from walking around. Her husband was noticing she wasn’t doing her “duty”. The best was when I went and shook dust all over her couch pillows and returned that night.
I made a show of flopping down on the couch from being “SO exhausted from work”. Dust went everywhere. Her husband was like “what the heck, don’t you ever vacuum”?
17. Two For One
I screen-capped photos from my wife’s lover’s Facebook. But it was what I did with them that was the true revenge. I sent them to the school administration, because he was a teacher and posting pictures of your student’s test, then making fun of them is not cool at all.
He was fired at the end of the year. Then after his dismissal, I divorced her and got her removed from her position at a daycare because it was a church-based facility with morality clauses for employment. All it took was a conversation with the pastor and she was phased out at the first available opportunity.
18. Don’t Trust The Truce
So everyone has heard of the classic “ex-lax in the brownies” trick right? Well my buddy pulled that weak sauce on me about a week ago, so I pulled this little diddy on him to show him just how much more worse it can get.
So there is this awesome weight loss medication called alli, which works by “turning off” the enzymes that digest ingested fats. So instead of being absorbed through the gut, they are instead passed right through the GI tract.
I took said buddy out to a “truce” dinner at the local asian buffet, pretty much fat covered in fat, and slipped him a dose mid-meal. The amount of raw sludge that has dripped, sloshed, and exploded out of him was more revenge than I could have ever hoped for.
19. A Bed Of Lies
When I was first out on my own, I went to live temporarily with some friends while I settled in and got my own place. I put most of my belongings in the storage unit of their apartment. I went back a week or so after moving into my own place to get my things, and my buddy told me that the guys he knows downstairs from him had taken my bed set.
I went down to confront them about it. When they opened the door I could see straight into their apartment and into the bedroom…and there was my bed. They denied it and said their uncle gave it to them and shut the door in my face.
I asked my buddy if he knew which car they owned, and he did. He pointed it out, I checked the doors. They were unlocked. I went into my car and grabbed the extra bottles of motor oil I had, and proceeded to coat the interior of their car in motor oil. The last bottle covered the driver seat.
Then I walked next door to the 7-11, bought a carton of milk, and poured it into the vents of the car.
20. Is This Thing On?
When I went paintballing, this one guy thought it would be hilarious to shoot me in the back of the leg “to see if it worked”. Obviously it hurt like crazy.
Anyways, two rounds in and we get put on the same team. He’s forgotten about it because he’s done about thirty other irritating things since then. He walks about ten feet in front of me as we begin the round and says “Is everyone ready”? Oh, I was so read. I shot him in the back of the leg and said “Yeah, just gotta check if this thing is working”.
He turns around screaming at me. So, ever so calmly, I shoot him again. Judging by his reactions, Walked away, he went home, victory.
21. Conniving Co-Worker
It was my first job in retail, and I was really close with the rest of the team. Some newcomers were hired for the summer, which gave us some healthy competition (we were on commission). One girl kept taking everyone else’s honestly-earned sales and when she was confronted she had no remorse.
She then continued taking everyone’s sales. Our schedule was always done on paper, and it is everyone’s job to read their schedules properly for the following week. In the case you can’t physically come into the store to write your schedule, you had to call and speak to a manager to read out your schedule over the phone.
Anyways, she ended up calling and didn’t ask for a manager to give her her schedule. I gave her all the wrong shifts, which was followed by termination due to job abandonment.
22. Get Down With The Sickness
I worked in an office once, and the boss was a real tool. If you used any of your sick days, he would hold that against you at your yearly review…but if he was sick at all, or even just felt like it, he would stay home or go golfing.
Well, there was a terrible flu going around. I was sick, a co-worker was sick and throwing up in his trash bin, but none of us were allowed to leave. So when my boss went home super early (again), I went into his office and coughed and sneezed all over his mouse and keyboard. He got really sick a day later.
In sixth grade, some kid made a snide remark in class about my name, and the whole class laughed. I saw him in the hallway carrying books the next day, so I kicked the back of his knee. The sound of teeth on linoleum still fills the spaces between my thoughts.
24. Nosey Neighbor
When my grandparents were younger, they lived in an apartment. The woman in the apartment below them (nearest to the mail box) would always read their letters.
My grandad knew because he could tell that she was re-sealing the glue over her kettle. So one day he decided to send a letter to himself. Its contents were perfect. It was a note saying, “Stop reading our letters you nosey cow”. Needless to say, their mail was never opened again and he never received that letter.
25. 12 AM Again
I’m a car mechanic. I changed a battery for a guy I can’t stand, so I didn’t connect the auxiliary pack before I removed the battery from his car. So his clock and radio stations all got reset.
26. Friends Again
I was playing follow the leader with my best friend in kindergarten. He was the leader and ran up the slide. Now, we weren’t supposed to run up the slide, but we were 5 years old and could make our own decisions.
I followed him, but the teacher saw me and told me to sit down on the pavement until recess was over. So I told her that my friend went up first and I just followed. The teacher called him over and asked if what I said was true, to which he said “No”. So then I told him we weren’t friends until he said sorry.
That showed him! He said sorry and then we played Tony Hawk on his N64 after school.
27. Sibling Rivalry
My little brother was a little brat. My parents got him a cat for his birthday, even though I could never have even dreamt of such a thing for myself.
So, I made the cat love me more than it loved him. Do not mess with me.
28. Try Explaining That
I dated a guy for three years and broke up with him when I found out he was married (whole other story). I basically did nothing when I found out other than stop speaking to him.
About 6 months later, I was thinking about it and wanted to send a little jab. I came up with the best idea. I logged into the student library site with his student card info and ordered a few dozen books on adultery to be delivered to his office (this was an option available to grad students) that he shared with two colleagues.
He’s a computer science major so the books were definitely not part of his studies. It was little but gave me a laugh!
29. Beat It
I was sitting in the library on the first day of fall semester trying to work and a kid wearing Beats headphones was loudly rapping to his music. I politely asked him to stop, to which he called me a keener or something, tried to make a scene, and got up and left. The thing was, he had forgotten to log off of his school account. So I dropped him from all his classes.
When I was 11 years old, I injured both my arms in a biking accident. My mom, being the skeptic that she is, didn’t believe me and waited 2-3 days before taking me to the hospital to get them looked at.
Turns out my left humerus was completely broken and my right radius was fractured. Because she waited so long, my left arm is now slightly crooked from being set wrong, but it wasn’t set bad enough to get re-broken and reset.
I still haven’t forgiven her, and for the next month after it happened I would keep hiding her keys in different places in the morning and watch her get confused when she would look for them, wondering where she last put them. To this day she still doesn’t know that I hid them. Needless to say she was late to work a few times.
31. Keep America Clean
When I was waiting to take my road test, the car in front of us was having a McDonald’s lunch, and tossed the garbage out when they were done. My dad was like, “Hey, you forgot your garbage”! or something sarcastic.
The other car was like, “No, it’s trash”, and my dad started throwing pieces of garbage into their car through the passenger window. They were like, “Excuse me Mister”!!! and just ended up arguing and throwing the trash back at my dad, which he would throw back again into the car.
I passed the test, by the way.
32. One Star For This Relationship
I posted links to the adult website my ex-girlfriend did a few photoshoots with to online reviews of the legitimate business she ended up working for after getting her life straight.
Sounds pretty awful, huh? I still wish I hadn’t done it, but she had just tried to get me fired with total lies when she discovered I had “moved on”. I have children. Trying to get me fired was evil. I texted after the posts with exactly this: “Telling lies to get people fired is stupid. The truth works so much better”. Then I sent the links to the “reviews” I posted.
I really shouldn’t have, but I was angry and it felt like self-defense at the time.
33. That Escalated Quickly
On April Fool’s Day this year, I had several friends send fake texts to another friend, Steve, who lives in a different state. The texts were pretend responses to an imaginary ad offering free kittens.
Steve somehow figures out it was me. I was in for the ride of my life. He then goes to a popular classifieds site and posts three separate ads with my number attached: free puppies, free kittens, and a free 42″ flatscreen TV.
I start receiving a flood of calls, texts, and voicemails. I was contacted by well over 150 interested individuals in the first couple hours. I frantically tried to think of how I was going to get him back, and then it hit me…
I responded to everyone by saying “Sure, it’s still available. Come by anytime tonight after 5. I’m Steve, here’s my address.”..
Except that I didn’t always say 5; I told people to come at different times. Steve had a steady stream of angry/disappointed visitors that evening from 4-10pm.
34. Past Curfew
I found out my high school girlfriend was cheating on me, so I called her parents’ house at 3 am after she had snuck out to meet up with the guy. She called back a few minutes later, furious. It was hilarious and I don’t regret it.
I found out later that the reason her parents had been strict about her curfew while we were dating was because she used to be an addict at 16 and was put on probation. She had just recently gotten her life back together before I met her. Good times.
35. Spring Breakers
The neighbors downstairs decided Tuesday night was a good night for a Spring Break party and yelled all night long.
I decided Wednesday morning was a great morning to do jumping jacks and get ready for my day while having every speaker in my house aimed at the floor blasting metal. Scum of earth neighbors.
36. Caught Red-Handed
My co-workers kept taking food from my table at work even though I’d repeatedly asked them to stop. After being fed up, I replaced their mints with chocolate candy laxatives. They ravaged the box and within 30 minutes it was very obvious who the culprits were.
The restrooms were unbearable to use the rest of the day but it was worth it.
37. A Dish Best Served Cold
When I was in high school, I flipped burgers at a fast food place. A few months in, I was fired by an assistant manager. She used to yell and demean people to get her way and I wouldn’t have any of that. So she claimed I was rude to customers and I was fired.
Almost 15 years later, I discovered she now worked at a company owned by a friend of mine. I bought him dinner. She was fired.
The job she did had nothing to do with the fast food place and I hadn’t talked to her in 15 years. It didn’t matter that she might have been a good worker or a changed person. It was petty revenge and I enjoyed it quite a bit.
I was in the line with my family in the elevators to get to the top of the Eiffel tower. This group of maybe five or six people that looked like they were in some sort of family reunion or trip cut in front of me in line. So I’m stuck behind five people and my family is in front of them.
I say excuse me and try to regroup with my family. This jerk with rather large eyebrows puts his hand on my chest and pushes me back. Not wanting to make a scene in a very crowded place with my kids watching, I just wait to regroup at the top.
So I meet up with my family and we enjoy the view and take a couple photos. We are about to get back on to the elevator back down and someone taps me on the shoulder. To my surprise it’s that jerk.
He wanted me to take a photo of him and his family. It was finally my chance for revenge. I kindly obliged. I took like four photos and made sure to crop him out of frame every time. There was a rather older lady with them and she looked on the brink. Also they weren’t French, so they probably never got a chance to take those photos again.
39. Crime Never Pays
When I was 14 my father and I spent every evening for a week refinishing a deck for a client. We finally get paid, $600 in cash, and head home for dinner. As we enjoy our meal inside, something darker is happening outside. The neighborhood teens who frequently roamed our street happened to be walking by our driveway when they decided to see if any cars were unlocked.
Guess which one was? The car with the cash. We were close to finishing dinner when my dad thought he heard something outside, which simultaneously made him remember the cash. He rushes out and sees the teens running off, only 25 yards down the road.
After checking the car extensively for the money he decides to call the authorities. They believe him because the kids had done this before. They knew who they were, but unfortunately, without them recovering the money nothing could be proven. It was gone.
For the next two years I took every opportunity for revenge. I ambushed them at night with a paintball gun once, trapped three uncollared outdoor cats I knew belonged to them and turned them into the shelter, called the authorities each time they drank outdoors then sat and watched them get picked up. All of it felt good and I feel we’re even.
40. Below The Belt
My brother broke an expensive pair of headphones I had recently purchased, and I told him one day I’d get him back. Still, I kept quiet about it for months. One night I was lying in bed unable to sleep and I decided to punch him as hard as I could. He doesn’t like me very much anymore…
41. A Friend In Need Is…No Longer A Friend
A friend of mine used to contact me only if he needed some kind of help from me. Then there came a day where I was in position to ask his help. I messaged him mentioning the favor and requested him to do it for me. NO REPLY.
Then I called him to ask him. NO RESPONSE. He didn’t answer the phone. He has neglected me like this in the past; this was the second time he did this.
This time, I couldn’t tolerate it. I wanted to get even. Not badly, no physical harm. But some kind of revenge. So I did this: I downloaded a VPN app. Connected with a fake IP. Opened Google search and typed “Request call Back”.
Now, several pages related to bank loans, credit cards, buying a home, and car insurance were listed. I spent two minutes opening around 20 of them in new tabs. In the request call back page, I gave his name, his mobile, and clicked submit.
42. Scorched Earth
My sister was riding an old gasoline scooter outside my grandparents’ house when she slipped and fell into a gigantic fire ant hill nobody had noticed. In mid-summer, especially after it rains, they can pop up overnight.
She got bit more than anybody I’ve ever seen, was freaking out, and went to the hospital later because of it. My cousin Will and I then went to the already-exposed colony, poured a perimeter of fire-ant killer around it, built a fire tee-pee into it, poured a generous amount of gasoline all in it and around it, set it ablaze, and stood back tossing old cans of WD-40 and the like into the fire.
43. One Step Ahead
In elementary school, a kid, let’s call him Chad, would always copy off of me. This day in class we got assigned a project where we had to glue pictures to a piece of paper.
Chad being Chad, he began to copy me. I saw this as the golden moment. When he went to the bathroom, I randomly put my papers in the wrong spots. When Chad got back, I left for the bathroom.
Upon my return I saw Chad had finished and was reading. I simply wipe my paper off and slowly look towards him and lay a devilish grin upon him. Oh, the look on his face.
44. Taught The Teacher A Lesson
I took a walking stick and crammed a load of plastic bags deep into the exhaust pipe of a teacher’s car who had it in for me. I found out he was saying mean things about me to the rest of the class when I was ill. I had the last laugh when he showed up to school the next week with a shiny new exhaust system.
45. That’ll Show Him…
There was this jerk who used to make it his personal mission to make my life miserable in school. I was quiet and never really bothered anybody, but for some reason that sort of thing set him off. I got back at him by keeping everyone at arm’s length and developing a bitter and cynical view of the world.
46. Spoiler Alert
I spoiled Breaking Bad for my friend because he was being a jerk. I’ll never forgive myself.
47. No Such Thing As A Free Lunch
During my divorce, our financial situation changed for a bit. That summer we placed our son in a super cheap Chicago Park District day camp. About three weeks in, I learned that a bigger kid was taking my son’s sandwich each day at lunch time.
The counselors were teenagers and I spoke to them, but nothing changed. I didn’t demand anything and my son didn’t really want to be known as a snitch. So I came up with a brilliant plan. Instead, I simply made two sandwiches and marked one.
The second sandwich was full of chili pepper. My son was nervous about it all but oh so happy that I had his back. The other kid took the bait and after two bites ran off to the bathroom! He didn’t bother my son again.
48. Pass It Forward
The girl I was seeing at the time cheated on me, so after a while of not talking I said it was alright and set her up with a friend of mine, who just so happened to have the clap. She caught it, I regret nothing.
My ex-girlfriend’s neighbor was always accusing her of not picking up after her dog. One day my ex opens her front door, and many piles of dog poo are there on the step. They’ve obviously been put there by the neighbor. Her revenge was brutal.
My ex then takes a bucket, puts all of the poops inside, fills the bucket with hot water, and walks to the neighbor’s house. When the neighbor answers the door, my ex throws the hot bucket of dirty water into the lady’s house.
50. Got Milk?
I was walking across the street at a crosswalk carrying a half gallon of milk home from Walgreens, and a lady came around the corner and actually hit me with her car.
She was only going like 10 miles an hour so I just fell onto the hood of her car, but my milk busted and started to spill everywhere. I couldn’t believe her response. She then yelled at me “WATCH WHERE YOU’RE GOING” through her window.
My rage levels were over 9000. So I tossed the now-open half gallon of milk into her car, gave her the finger, and walked away.
It’s true what they say: money makes the world go round. In order to succeed in this life, you need to have a good grasp of key financial concepts. That’s where Moneymade comes in. Our mission is to provide you with the best financial advice and information to help you navigate this ever-changing world. Sometimes, generating wealth just requires common sense. Don’t max out your credit card if you can’t afford the interest payments. Don’t overspend on Christmas shopping. When ordering gifts on Amazon, make sure you factor in taxes and shipping costs. If you need a new car, consider a model that’s easy to repair instead of an expensive BMW or Mercedes. Sometimes you dream vacation to Hawaii or the Bahamas just isn’t in the budget, but there may be more affordable all-inclusive hotels if you know where to look.
Looking for a new home? Make sure you get a mortgage rate that works for you. That means understanding the difference between fixed and variable interest rates. Whether you’re looking to learn how to make money, save money, or invest your money, our well-researched and insightful content will set you on the path to financial success. Passionate about mortgage rates, real estate, investing, saving, or anything money-related? Looking to learn how to generate wealth? Improve your life today with Moneymade. If you have any feedback for the MoneyMade team, please reach out to [email protected]. Thanks for your help!
The Moneymade team