It's no secret that dating is complicated — especially if you are trying to figure out if you and potential significant other are even compatible. Weeding out the bad partners may seem simple enough, but there is one sure fire way to really know if things are bound to fall apart.
Evaluating someone's mannerisms and quirks on a first date, or even months after dating, can become extremely insightful. These Reddit users shared their biggest turnoff when it comes to a romantic partner, and you will definately be able to relate to some of these. Everyone has their romantic preferences, and these people will let you know what they don't want!
Don't forget to check the comment section below the article for more interesting stories!
#1 Common Courtesy
Holding up lines. I once broke off a promising relationship because this girl would manage to hold up a line EVERYWHERE we went.
Whether it was fumbling for change, having to dig through her purse for a card with a huge line behind her, taking her sweet time to order (with a lot of complicated modifications), insisting on ordering off "secret menus" then berating them for not knowing how to make it, constantly trying to use expired gift cards/coupons, trying to barter prices, and always having to do "separate transactions to reduce the taxes she'd have to pay... "can I do 2 dollars debit and the rest in cash?" the list goes on. She was a nightmare to go on a date with or run errands with.
It wasn't even just food places, it was anywhere that involved forming a line. I constantly found myself mouthing I'm sorry to people behind us or people dealing with her. It gave me so much anxiety and made me feel that she was incapable of being a considerate person, with a complete lack of self-awareness.
It may seem like a trivial, Seinfeld-esque reason to break up with someone, but I couldn't take it.
#2 The Worst
Refusal to accept responsibility for ANYTHING that happens to them.
#3 Blowing Up Someone's Phone
Don't get me wrong, I actually prefer text over calling. But if I don't answer immediately, please don't proceed to text me until I do. This is an actual excerpt from a Facebook message conversation from a guy I don't know who friend requested me after I tagged my brother in a pic:
Him: Have I been flirting too much?
Him: I blame the crown.
Me: I'm more worried that there's no way I can meet your expectations. You're kinda putting me on a pedestal here and I'm getting uncomfortable.
Him: Oh really?
Him: Well, naw.
Him: I just enjoy making a girl feel special.
Him: So I worry I'll get too sappy and you will throw me in the bucket with all the other desperate guys who just want to sleep with you or see you naked.
Him: Because I'm sure you have tons of suitors.
Him: But I'll let you move at glacial speed.
Him: Just being up front.
Him: I'd like my future wife to very much be my best friend first.
The thing was, this was actually a guy that I'd wanted to get to know when he first added me. Then it got to be a chore to talk to him. I'm still a little creeped out.
#4 This Is A Far Too Common Practice
Constantly talking about an ex.
#5 Kindness Goes A Long Way
A few months ago, I went on a date with this girl from OkCupid. We'd been chatting for a good week or so and I was pretty excited as we really seemed to click.
The first date is awesome. We chat and laugh and just generally have a good time while wandering around the city. The second date... not so much. We go to a restaurant and she is so incredibly rude to the waitress that I'm convinced the girl spent the duration of our stay in the kitchen crying.
The merit of a person is determined by how he/she treats their perceived inferiors.
#6 Mo' Money Mo' Problems
People that are extremely spoiled and continually brag about it.
#7 No Holding Back Here
Being very healthy, social, and productive. The result is incredibly off-putting.
Those people who wake up early. Who don't drink. Who don't get annoyed out of their mind by everyone else. Who do stuff like jogging, respect other people's religious beliefs, stay in touch for the sake of not burning bridges, care about contributing to the community in inane ways, and enjoy small talk. People who like motivational quotes and despise smokers and everyone who should be despised. Who like everyone who is a real solid person and who should be liked.
Who think of the children. Who don't do substances. Who have a healthy dose of patriotism without being called "rednecks" and get into stable relationships and don't mind settling. Who aren't religious fanatics but believe there is something out there and are spiritual. Who claim they love to work. Who don't listen to their music too loudly and what they listen to is top 40 but they also go crazy and let loose every 5 years and go to a U2 or Coldplay concert. They read some self-help books and like to give sound advice. Who read Coelho and say their lives changed for it.
They smile a lot and sometimes you can see a glimpse of pure desperation in their eyes but then they go jogging or listen to some Coldplay. They consider giving up on their biggest vice which is coffee because they are concerned about the negative effects of caffeine but sometimes they can't help themselves and feel so bad and naughty for it. Sometimes they like to say they had an issue they struggled with in the past like drinking too much because they used to get under the influence in college or like an abusive relationship because they got cheated on. They think they learned a lot in life.
They see a therapist and think it was a great experience and that everyone should do it some time. They are careful with gluten and seriously feel so much better now they no longer have it. They feel better when their food claims its organic. They make you want to erase them from reality.
#8 Guilty As Charged
Non-stop cell phone use.
#9 Mind Games
Being flaky. If you're not interested, tell me.
#10 Eye Roll
Arrogance. Confidence is a good thing, but when someone is really full of themselves and thinks that they are God's gift to the world 24/7, I can't stand it.
#11 Like Watching Paint Dry
Physically, lack of dental hygiene.
Mentally/socially it would be not being able to have a conversation about anything. I dated a girl in high school who knew absolutely nothing about anything. It was really weird.
#12 Looks Aren't Everything
Rudeness, arrogance, and attitude problems in general. You can be the most physically attractive person in the world, but the moment you start treating other people like dirt, I lose all interest.
#13 Less Is More
Self-promoters. Absolutely cannot tolerate being around people who are constantly telling you about all the things that they've done in order to prove they are a good person.
Newsflash: Good people don't need to talk about it, they just are.
#14 One Way To Kill The Mood
I love romance in the morning... but you can't face me.
#15 Personal Hygiene Is Rather Integral
Funky smell. Take a shower, matey.
#16 Conversation Is Key
A lack of the ability/desire to carry a real and meaningful conversation.
I had a really good looking girl flirting with me at the bar like a year ago until she said something along the lines of "One of the things I like about you is how pale you are, I can't stand darkskins."
I swear I could hear a record scratch.
#18 Not Everyone Is Into Buff
Overly huge muscles. I may be one of few on this but I absolutely do not find the whole vein popping, super swole, I spend every waking minute at the gym look very appealing. Too peacocky for me.
Indecisiveness when making plans.
What do you want to do?
Whatever you want.
Ok, but we have done what I wanted on literally every date and I am running out of ideas for things to do.
#20 Some Of Us Are Needier Than Others
When they don't give you any attention whatsoever. I'm not asking for every single moment of your life, but just tell me that you love me often and make plans with me. That's really what I want most.
I don't know how to explain this correctly so I'll just exemplify:
One day I was talking with a girl I recently met and she asked me out in the middle of the week and at like 2:00 PM. I told her I couldn't because I was working, and she knew I did work. Then she asked me to go at night and I also couldn't because I had a college class to attend and that day was important.
Then she asked me what I did in my work and what degree I was doing at college. She really didn't know it because we were talking for a short time and I didn't tell much about myself. I explained to her I work with IT, computers, applications, support etc and was an engineering student.
"Oh wow. I didn't know you like these nerd things hahahahhahahaha."
I didn't even answer back.
#22 You Have To Love Yourself First
Poor hygiene should go without saying.
Insecurity. I'll take arrogance over a lack of confidence any day in a girl. I'm poor at dealing with it, it's literally a romance-killer, and it's hard to believe a person is actually being who they really are when they're so concerned that it's not good enough for others.
#23 Your Kids Should Come First
People who have children but act like they are a chore to take care of. And they complain about the kids always spoiling their life. Those parents really only care about themselves and I always feel so bad for their kids, as they don't get that unconditional love they need. Very sad.
#24 Dating Is Too Complicated
Any idea of her being with other guys at the same time. Be it cheating, polyamory, even the idea of people seeing multiple people at once.
I get that's how dating works now, and I don't think there's anything WRONG with any of it. But man, the idea of 'well how many other guys does she have' bothers me.
Once I'm in a relationship I'm completely trusting. It's just that weird early dating phase where this stresses me out.
#25 Snap Back To Reality
Overly popular to the point of socially distracted. You have to unplug sometimes.
If they honestly want to be a model. Like, looking pretty is their main goal in life. That's sad.
If they expect to be treated as anything other than equals.