People Dish on Their Real Life “Did I Stutter!?” Throwdowns
Every human has a limit. Yet some people insist on pushing that boundary until there’s nothing else to do but bite back with a thundering “Did I stutter!?” These Redditors shared the moments that forced them to ask if the other party in question truly understood their words. Such firm offers of clarification are not always well-received.
Stay clear of these shocking real life “Did I Stutter!?” showdowns.
1. Not the Only Tool Bag Here
I was working as a plumbing apprentice at a very large mall. It was just myself and my foreman. Our meeting room was way on the other side in the basement from the store where we were working. My foreman would bring his tools in the morning and then after 30 minutes of looking at what was completed yesterday, make an excuse and spend the rest of the day reading the paper in our office, then saunter back at the end of the day to get his tools.
Well one Friday, he brought his tools in the morning, made his excuse, and disappeared. I didn’t see him all day…not even when it was time to go home. So, I packed up all the tools and struggled across the busy mall back to the lock up. My foreman had clearly lost track of time and was startled when I showed up. He looked at all the stuff I’d brought and realized I’d left his personal tools on the other side of the mall.
He freaked out and demanded that I “Go back and get his tool bag right the F**k now!” I looked at him and pointed out that they were his personal tools and it was after regular work hours, but he cut me off and shouted, “Did I freaking stutter?” So, I went back across the mall. Into the storefront. Dumped all his tools onto the floor and brought back his empty tool bag. Back at the lock up he looked at me, gasped, and said “Where are all my tools?”
To which I replied, “You told me to go back and get your tool bag, and you didn’t stutter.” I was promptly transferred to another job-site Monday morning.
2. It’s Never the Bright Ones
Vehicle Inspector here.
“Sir, your back-right tail is broken, you need to get that fixed and come back.”
“I’m friends with the owner here, and you’re telling me that my car has a problem?”
“I already have. If you aren’t prepared in the future, don’t waste my time.”
3. Real Estate, Fake Friends
I found out that my supposed best friend, who I was letting live on my couch, was cheating on me with my girlfriend. She and I lived together at the time. I work in IT, so I work crazy long hours, but we had a massive power outage one day, and the boss said to just go home. I left five hours early and caught both of them red handed.
I kicked them both out at once. They apologized profusely, and asked me even though they made a mistake, why would I kick them out on the streets in an area where they can’t afford to live? (Silicon Valley). I laughed my butt off and said, “I guess that’s something you two should have figured out during pillow talk huh?” and slammed my front door as hard as I could in their faces.
Needless to say it wrecked me for a while because I loved that girl but looking back, I think it’s the only moment in my life where I’m proud to have stood up for myself–and that is priceless.
4. The Buck Stops Here
Horrible situation. My mom was alcoholic who paid for all of her boyfriend’s nursing home expenses and then paid all of his family’s major expenses like car maintenance, appliances, and home remodelling. My mom’s addiction causes her health to plummet. She needs nursing care. Her boyfriend dies and his family never contacts her unless it’s to complain about that they need money.
I take over her finances and cut off of all of their sugar momma payments. If they had stayed in contact or regularly visited her, sure I would’ve considered it. But no. They just wanted her to cover their payments. I cut off the entire family. My mother had a lot of money. That’s when the boyfriend’s sister calls to tell me they’re going to report me to adult protective services.
I say, “Go ahead, I have nothing to hide and your guys are trash.” They were flabbergasted that I said, “Did I stutter?” After they tried to report me, adult protective services just reached out to see if I needed help transitioning my mother to nursing care. They stopped talking to my mom after that. She died never hearing from them again. I was the one holding her hand during her last few days of life. They didn’t come to her funeral.
5. The Final Countdown Means Final
When I quit my job, I gave my boss three weeks’ notice, making my last day March 31st. He proceeded to tell me that we would discuss a time when he would allow me to leave, and I wasn’t allowed to leave until he said so. I firmly repeated myself that March 31st would be my last day, and it was not negotiable. He was the worst person I’ve ever worked with in my career.
6. Don’t Come A-Knockin’
Had a door to door salesman ring the doorbell. I was nice and opened the door and stepped outside onto the step (dogs were going bananas). I let him tell me what he was selling, and then politely told him I wasn’t interested. Went to open the screen door to go in, and he put his arm out to stop it from opening. I have resting B-word face normally, so I guess the look on my face was enough, but I was instantly livid with him.
7. Drop That Sausage, Sausage Fingers!
When I worked in a gas station, two guys walked in and kept looking at where all the workers were. I kept an eye on them cause they looked shady, then I see one of the guys put a pack of sausages in his pocket and come to the till to buy an energy drink. I made my co-worker (also my sister) move so I could serve them and when I scanned the red bull, I said in the most casual way I could, with my heart nearly ripping out of my chest (I’m not a confrontational person), Do you wanna pay for the sausages you put in your pocket, too? ”
The look on his face was priceless. He just mumbles “sorry” and pays for the sausages. After they left, my co-worker lost it, and said how taken back she was. She thought I was being rude to the customer before she realized what happened.
She ended up telling the manager about it and I got a good ol’ pat on the back.
8. I Don’t Like This Phone Plan
My ex continued to text me like normal for two weeks after she broke up with me. Eventually I ended up telling her, “Look, you don’t wanna date, you don’t wanna be friends, I’m not gonna keep making small talk to make you feel better.” A week later, she STILL texted me to wish me a happy birthday. The breakup according to her was because I couldn’t “read the room” well. Jesus Christ.
9. Everybody’s Working for the Weekend
“No thank you I don’t want to work Saturday.”
“Are you doing anything on Saturday?”
“No, I just don’t want to work Saturday, you contracted me to work weekdays.”
Anyway, I got a complaint filed against me for not being a team-player.
To add context, it was my first job after leaving school, so I never really knew how to defend myself from and stand up to office malarkey. At the time, I did do a few Saturdays to appease them but joined a sports team to give me a reason not to. I have since left for a better job.
10. A Recipe for Something Fishy
I was a customer service representative for a popular pizza chain and was handed a phone with an angry customer on the other line. They were complaining about having a pizza messed up, and I asked what they ordered. Over the next few minutes, their story kept on changing. First it was the sauce, then the toppings, then a missing side. I called him out on it and told him to go scam some other restaurant. Needless to say, he only got one F bomb in before I hung up on him.
11. A “Ruff” Comparison
We dropped our dog off at the groomers for her usual trim. When I returned three hours later, the receptionist returned with a dog that, while adorable, was definitely not our dog. Not the same breed or even size. I chuckled and said this is definitely not my dog. To which the receptionist thought the appropriate reply was “Yes, that’s Mylie.” That was her name, but not the same dog. I retorted, “I think I know what my own dog looks like, miss.”
“Well, that’s her. If you don’t like the cut, you can discuss it with the groomer.” That dismissive comment immediately made me lose my patience. “Hey! Get out from behind that desk and take this dog. We will go back there together, and I will show you which dog is mine. I’m not going to waste another breath arguing this with you. Let’s go.”
I found our Mylie. It was the dog that was excited instead of confused when she saw me. I got that grooming for free.
12. Top of the “To-Don’t” List
When I was a shift lead in a kitchen, we had this one high schooler who always had an attitude and typically, I’d just ignore it. But one day she didn’t want to prep or clean dishes. I gave her the choice, but she flat out said no to doing both. Since she had time to talk with her co-workers, I told her to do both.
I usually don’t “make” people do anything. I ask if they can, but this time I deliberately made her do both. They usually don’t often see me being direct like that, so it was effective. I almost stuttered too, but I will never let her know that.
13. No Vacancies in My Patience
My ex lived with me when I found out that his friend who was doing pro bono work overseas was actually his fiancé. Me kicking him out was my “Did I stutter?!” moment. He thought “But where am I going to live?” was a question I would give a flying darn about the answer to. He was not my ex yet when this happened. He is my ex now.
14. I’m Not Paying Your Phone Bill
I was babysitting an arrestee at the hospital. Since he had a broken leg, they wanted to do a video arraignment. Whatever, I don’t care, I’m getting paid to watch YouTube. They asked for my email address to send me a link to use my phone for the video conference. Sorry, I don’t have a work phone. Oh no, they say, use my personal phone for the video arraignment.
Yeah no. My personal phone is not being used in an arraignment. That leaves it open to discovery in my opinion.
No, it’s fine, they say. Officers do it all the time.
Cool. It’s not happening.
But the judge is waiting.
I don’t work for the judge. Not happening.
15. Anywhere Else But Here Right Now
When I found out about my (now) ex-husband’s last affair (he had several), I told him to open his iPad and start looking for a place to stay as he sure as heck wasn’t going to be staying in the house. He sat there and just looked at me like I was joking. I said your fingers aren’t broken, start tapping away and find a place. Either I can pack your bag for you which will be done in three seconds or you can pack it.
I said you have three choices. The car, the gutter, or find a friend.
He then stood up and made his way to the bedroom to pack. Said he can stay at a friend’s. I said I don’t care where you stay, but it won’t be here. Moved in with the last affair the following day.
16. No Time for Class Clowns
Teacher here. This one time, there was a kid that was really annoying. I live by the principle “Three strikes and you’re out.” When the time came, I calmly told him to leave. He didn’t make any moves to leave, so I said: “That wasn’t a question, by the way.” But he still hesitated way too long to take his belongings and go, so I dropped the “Did I stutter?” on him. After that, he was gone quickly.
I’m generally a young and quite loose teacher, so this always gets the whole class very, very silent when it happens. Love that.
17. Penny for Your Thoughts?
Yeah, that would be the day I quit a 16-year job because they informed me that the money earmarked for my recovery from work-related stress was for other people who “might” need it, and I would have to start paying out of pocket. After ten minutes of chewing the HR Rep out over the phone about how I was done, how horrible the place had become, how I never wanted to see or hear from anyone there again I got, “So what time will you be back in the office?”
All I could do was hang up the phone, thank the therapist I could no longer afford and go home. I never set foot in the office again.
18. It’s Time to Log Off
I volunteer in the computer lab of a homeless shelter. People use the computers to look for jobs, housing, education, etc., although most of the time they’re just on YouTube. We have enough computers that this isn’t usually an issue; if they choose not to use their time productively, their time can be limited at the discretion of the monitor.
So, one guy is listening to music when another guy comes in needing to look for an apartment. Since all the computers are full, and this guy has been on the longest, it’s his turn to get booted off. I tell him politely, “Your time is up. You can have a minute or two to finish what you’re doing, but you’ll have to get off.” And he says, in a confrontational tone, “Are you a police officer?”
So, I say to him “As long as we’re in this room, you’re right I’m a police officer.” He said, “Alright” and left without any trouble.
19. Dial M for Murder
I was working at Wally World, and a customer who was on his phone from the start of his transaction (DON’T!!!! DO!!!! THIS!!!!) placed a big package of toilet paper on the belt. I told him it was $10 even. He was still on his phone, but handed me a $10 bill.
Gave him his receipt and he walked away. Right before he walked out, he noticed I didn’t give him the change, and he tried to argue with me that I didn’t tell him that it was $10, and he wanted a refund. I sent him to Customer Service because I couldn’t give him a refund even if I wanted to, and he mumbled under his breath that I was a dumb slur. At that point, I replied, “It’s not my fault you were on your phone.”
He turned his head around and said, “What did you say?!”
I slammed my hands down on the countertop and said, loud and clear, “I SAID, ITS NOT MY FAULT YOU WERE ON YOUR PHONE.”
He took a step back and left, and I went on my break. Worth it.
20. Shades of Get the Heck Out
I had a very sheltered friend at my house during high school. She lived about a mile from me. She has a frankly very racist mother, made fun of my heritage (I am mixed race, white mom, black-Hispanic bio-dad who died, then mom married a white Jewish man who raised me), made a comment about my mother being dirty because she was with a “mud-man” and made a comment about how odd it is that my dad hasn’t given me away because I’m not his when my half-brother is his son (therefore there’s no need for me, he has his own child now).
I said in a very plain voice, “Get the heck out of my house.” She thought I was joking but I said it again, she asked why, and I said, “The fact that you need to ask makes me want to strangle you.” Then she said her mom wasn’t coming for another couple hours. I told her to walk home. She avoided me for a few days. After that, she apologized profusely.
She had said what happened to our other friends, and they all berated her and had to explain to her why what she said was horrid. I forgave her but Jesus Christ that girl was sooo sheltered.
She wasn’t a bad person. She just didn’t have any exposure thanks to her mom. In the end it helped her grow as a person, so that’s a plus.
21. The Baby Mama Vs. “Drama”
I’m a medical resident.
I was working the newborn nursery and had a new mom ask us for help as the baby’s father who was abusive, actively using drugs, and had been absent the entire pregnancy was now trying to forcibly get involved. When I mentioned consulting social work as part of the plan, he looked at me and he said, “How about we don’t talk to social work, I have enough drama in my life, and I don’t want any more.”
So, I looked right back at him and said, “The reason we’re consulting social work is to ensure we don’t have any more ‘drama’ when baby leaves the hospital.” He backed off immediately.
22. The Stars (and Your Schedule) Just Don’t Align
I volunteered to work as a “library monitor” for our school library. Basically, you just help check in books and do some shelving. Fairly simple. The librarian (let’s call her Ms. H) asked me when I was available. I was a shy, anxious kid who doesn’t really like talking to teachers, but I told her I could help Monday and Friday mornings. She said “alright” and checked me off. I guess she mistakenly checked me off to help on Thursday mornings (I got volleyball practice), but I didn’t see the paper.
I don’t show up because I didn’t apply for that time. Ms. H saw me as she came out of the staff room to ask me why I wasn’t here for library monitors.
Me startled: Oh, um I didn’t apply for Thursdays. I have volleyball practice on those days.
Ms. H, confused: What? Didn’t you say your available on Thursdays?
Me in my head: Oh, did I stutter?
Me: No, I don’t recall.
Ms. H: Well, now you have to work Thursdays. Since Fridays are full.
Me shocked: I told you already, I have volleyball practice.
Ms. H, frustrated: You either work on Thursdays or you quit.
Me: sighs Guess I’ll quit. I’m gonna be late for class. Have a good day.
Ms. H was startled at my response and kinda just stood there. She hated me for the rest of the year which gave me anxiety on my grades. Welp, Ms. H if you’re reading this somehow, screw you and your BS.
23. Pit It & Quit It
Me: Sorry, but I can’t let you back into the pit. If you need to get to the other side, go up to the 300 cross section and go around.
Customer: But I just need to cross through
Me: Go to the 300 section and walk around
Customer: I can’t cut through? I have a pit pass!
Me: The pit is closed. You need to go to the 300 section and go around using that cross section.
I work as an usher at an open-air amphitheater and I have this conversation with multiple customers at the end of every show.
Just for context on the “no re-entry” rule, it’s only at the end of the show when we’re trying to clear the amphitheater. We don’t allow people back into the pit section because we want it cleared out ASAP so they can breakdown the stage without guests getting in the way.
24. Suddenly Not the Betting Man
My friend bet me $20 that he could beat me in MKX. When I destroyed him he said double or nothing. I beat him again. When he got paid, I told him he owed me $40.
25. I Just Can’t Quit You
“If you don’t work tonight, I’m quitting.”
“I’m working tonight. Don’t worry.”
That’s what my co-worker told me. We were cooks in this lousy kitchen, and we were the only ones scheduled to work that night. I knew it was going to be busy as heck due to the holiday. But during school, I saw her friends trying to convince her to call out sick so she could go this party. There was no way I was working this shift by myself.
She came to work. Relief. Then her friends came into the restaurant. She went out there. They started talking. She came back in and said, “I’m not feeling well. Think I’m going to leave.” I said I don’t think I freaking stuttered before. Don’t do this or I’m out of here. I’m dead serious. She walked back out of the kitchen to her friends. They were low key whispering. And then she told the bartender she wasn’t feeling well.
I said screw this, threw down my apron, walked outside to my car. They all stared at me. I flipped them off, got into my car, and drove off. Boss called me. I said I quit. And I meant it.
…Six months later, I was back working there.
26. Gratitude Is A Dish Best Served with Cash
Went out for food with my other half to some small Chinese restaurant. It was us and maybe two other tables on a Friday night, and honestly it was the best food we’d ever tasted. We were served by some old guy, and he just made us feel welcome. Then the bill came. I think it was around £40? Thought screw that and doubled it as a tip.
He just looked at me in disbelief, tipping in the UK really isn’t that big
Pressing the green enter button on that card machine was my best “Did I stutter?” moment.
27. Won’t Someone Think of the Children?
I worked for a nonprofit childcare organization for a decade. It was so badly managed; there was just crisis after crisis. We failed a licensing inspection because nobody would allocate resources to fixing serious issues (even though my site was running bare-bones and making hundreds of thousands of dollars per year.) During the inspection, the licenser noted that the floor tiles were exceptionally old and because of their dimensions she suspected they contained asbestos. At the time, I knew that some of the tiles were broken and pulling up from the floor which would expose the children to particulate matter.
I went to the regional director with a list of complaints and wrapped it up with a strong suggestion that we investigate the possibility that the staff and more importantly the children were being exposed to carcinogenic materials. They essentially responded with “It’s not in the licensing agreement, so we don’t need to spend money on that.”
I checked out after that conversation and reported everything I possibly could to the appropriate authorities.
28. Punch the Clock
I was working a retail job (think crummy gas station) and was about a year and a half in, working all kinds of overtime, always with the usual guilt trip to get you cover their butts. Once I worked 45 days straight. Then, the general manager took two weeks of vacation while another woman bailed six out of eight days in a row. I had requested Friday off as I had plans, even telling them the day before that if this lady cancelled again, I couldn’t cover.
Cue text message from the assistant manager asking me to come in. I tell her that I can’t, which then leads to another employee texting me about how I need to step up. She says I’m useless, people there hate me, etc. I told the manager, who said I had to drop it if I wanted to keep my job. When I went into work the next day, I proceeded to get my butt ripped about how I don’t cover enough hours.
Apparently if I ask for time off, I need to make sure that it’s for a legitimate reason because I’m 30 years old and taking time off from work to watch a TV show is childish and I need to grow up. I told her that I could do whatever I want with my time off and as a matter of fact if you’re picking up so much of my slack, you can pick it up all because I’m quitting.
And then I walked out on a day when we got four different delivery trucks in. I threw gasoline on that witch and burnt that bridge up. Have no regrets except I should have done it sooner.
29. No Means No, No Matter Who You Are
My parents were abusive jerks, and last year I finally got the courage to go no contact with them. It’s been a rough journey, but nowhere near as hard and emotionally turbulent as dealing with them was. I told them to not contact me and I’d reach out when I was ready. Sure enough, they couldn’t respect the one request I gave them. Constant emails, ranging anywhere from furious to begging. I ignored them all.
I graduated college recently, and they emailed again saying they were coming to my graduation, and the only way I could avoid it is if I specifically told them I didn’t want them there, thereby breaking the no contact. I never got to verbally say “Did I stutter??” But the fact they came up for my graduation, realized quickly I wasn’t there, and have finally given me the peace I’ve been asking for has proven that the message got across just as well, if not better, without words.
30. The Gate to Paradise Are Closed Until 5
On my much needed 30-minute lunch break at work, a man approaches me and asks me if I am a man of God, and if I’d like to hear more about Christ or something like that. I said no to both. He continued speaking to me, to which I replied: “You will get nowhere with this, with me, today, Goodbye.” And stood there until he left. May have been harsh, but I was just in no mood that day…
31. Taking a Stab at Safety
I do a lot of blacksmithing. One time, I was in a class and the kid in the next forge over was waving around a BURNING piece of steel. Burning. As in hotter than white hot, so hot it’s nearly blinding and spewing sparks everywhere. He came over to my area and threatened to stab me with it, as a joke. I told him to screw off and dunk that in water. He didn’t and made some stabbing motions toward me.
This is dangerous stuff. He should know better. I ended up making him drop it in the water. Then I told the teacher. He got kicked from the class, thank God.
32. Not Stuttering is a Dirty Business
Working retail in a liquor store, I get to use this line more times than I wish I had to. I also sometimes do the countdown from three followed by a call to the police.
One time, it involved a man who had clearly pooped his pants and we had to remove him before the trail made it all the way down his leg. Good times.
33. If You Can’t Handle Being Fired, Stay Out of the Kitchen
A lifetime ago, I was a manager in a fast food restaurant staffed mainly by high schoolers. Most were fine, one was a total jerk. In his first few weeks, he made some major screw ups (including shorting out a microwave by trying to reheat a chicken in its foil-lined bag), but nothing that could be proven to be malicious.
One day, he decides to experiment with the deep fryer. I happened to walk around the corner as he threw a handful of shredded lettuce in. As soon as I ascertained that nobody had been injured, I just said to him “Get your stuff and get out.” He starts protesting that it was just a mistake and he didn’t know that throwing water-sodden lettuce into an industrial deep fryer would result in hot oil spraying the entire prep area. I was so mad that he’d put the other staff in danger that I just screamed “Out!”
34. Your Princess is in Another Castle. Leave Mine Alone.
My ex-boyfriend just recently tried to win me back, after HE was the one who dumped me. He was trying to win me back from January all the way to last month, and no matter how many times I said no, he always came back with the same excuse of “I know you hate me but I really miss you.”
So, on the last day he tried to win me back, he pulls up to my house with flowers and chocolates and says he still loves me. He had woken me up from my afternoon nap with my dog and that really cheesed me off. I have had enough at that point. So, I pushed the flowers into his chest and said “Can you kindly leave me alone? For the last time, I am so sick and tired of having to reject you, it’s pathetic.”
He then tried to argue with me saying he knows he was wrong, and he can change. I was so mad and cranky that I just yelled as loud as I could, “Get it through your thick skull that I don’t like you anymore! I blocked your number and you on every social media for a reason, you nutjob!” And then I slammed the door in his face and had some tea, cuddled with my dog, and watched The Office. He hasn’t tried to contact me since.
35. No Place to Play Around
I went to buy Castlevania: Order of Ecclesia when it came out at Gamestop. I get that you’re required to upsell and offer things like strategy guides and plans but this jerk first thought I was buying the game for my husband and even asked, “Does your man want a warranty plan-thing?” I told him no, it was for me. Then he tries to sell me the strategy guide for the game; I told him no, I’m good.
“But the game is reeeeeeeeal hard. You’re going to need it.”
“I can manage.”
“No, really, it’s hard.”
“And I’ll deal with it myself or look at Gamefaqs. Ring me up.”
Then he gets that little embarrassed, simpering smile like, “Geez, okay,” and rings me up.
The game is tough as balls (arguably the toughest in the 2Ds), but I didn’t need the guide, except for how to get like 1 or 2 glyphs. Screw that guy.
36. When a Question isn’t a Question
I was a manager in a retail clothing store. During a lull, I checked supplies at each register, got the cashiers to tidy their areas and remove all the hangers that had been collected during the afternoon. I tried to make it a habit of asking people to do things rather than tell them to do it because it was a more decent thing to do. Most people understood that my request wasn’t really optional, but this one cashier didn’t quite get it.
“Would you mind taking your hangers to the stockroom and cleaning your area up a bit before the evening rush?” Cashier: “No, I’m good. Me: “Let me rephrase. Take your hangers to the stockroom and clean your area up now please. Generally, when a manager asks you to do something, they are trying to be respectful. It isn’t actually optional.” Cashier: “Oh, ok.”
The cashier was literally leaning over the cubicle with her chin resting on her elbows when I asked her to do this.
37. Blood is Thicker Than Water, But Not as Thick as this Grudge
My mom left me when I was two. She recently tried to talk to me now, 14 years later. I nicely told her that I don’t want to talk to her and asked her to leave me alone and let me live my life. She ignored that and after several attempts to contact me and to follow me on social media, she came up to me at a local fireworks event. I saw her staring at me all night and slowly following me but decided to ignore her. Well when she finally came up to me, I told her to “screw off and leave me alone.” The look on her face was one of disbelief.
38. Your Attitude Doesn’t Add Up
I showed a professor my solution, and he started saying “Well you need to do x, y, z” and I said “I’m aware.” He actually jumped back because he was shocked by my abruptness, but I was really annoyed by him in general. He looked at my code again and realized I did solve the problem, but just in a much shorter way than he expected. He then apologized.
39. Not Everyone Wants to Be #1
I was flirting with a guy that was in an open relationship, but he started to get pushy, so I told him I wanted to just be friends. I guess the way I said it, he figured I just didn’t want an open relationship, so I guess he broke up with the other girl or whatever and asked me if I wanted to “be his girl” exclusively a couple weeks later. I said no, and he started to get pushy about it. Even after I reiterated no in a different way, he continued. After that I told him I wasn’t going to talk to him at all anymore. It was pretty creepy TBH.
40. Big Enough to Count
For reference, I’m a 6’2 and 20-year-old girl.
I went bowling a few weeks ago, and the lady behind the counter asked for my shoes size. I told her I need a 10 in men’s. She looked me up and down and was like “Are you sure?”…. Yeah I’m sure I know my own shoe size.
41. Feel the Burn, Boss
I was burned really badly in a kitchen accident early in the morning. On the way to the hospital, I told my manager that I was sorry, but I wouldn’t be able to make my shift. He immediately starts into “No you have to come in, it can’t be that bad” etc. and my reply was something along the lines of “I’m on my way to the hospital. I’m not asking permission; I’m telling you I won’t be there.”
42. What Goes Around Will Come Around
My nephew and his boyfriend had very recently ended up on my doorstep for reasons I’m sure you can imagine. I decided I was keeping them, had a lawyer help me get things drawn up, and then notified both sets of parents exactly what was going to happen if they didn’t want me to notify authorities, as they were both pretty banged up when I got them.
The boyfriend’s parents fortunately/unfortunately wanted everything to go away and agreed to transfer guardianship without a word. Nephews parents decided to try and argue with me. I basically had to cut them off mid rant and actually said the words ‘Did I stutter?! He’s not going back to you, and if you try and fight me on this you are the one that’s going to jail!’
Needless to say, they complied after a bit more of me losing my absolute mind on them. I’ve never wished I could reach through a phone to smack someone more than that day.