middle aged woman reading documents, siblings arguing in background

My parents named me executor, and now my siblings expect me to work for free. Should family executors get paid?


September 4, 2026 | Sammy Tran

My parents named me executor, and now my siblings expect me to work for free. Should family executors get paid?


Congratulations, You Inherited A Second Job

Your parents trusted you enough to put you in charge of their estate. Now you are sorting paperwork, dealing with banks, tracking bills, answering questions, and possibly preparing a house for sale while your siblings wait for their inheritance. Then someone suggests that taking an executor fee would be “making money off Mom and Dad,” and suddenly an already difficult job becomes a family argument.

Yes, Executors Can Usually Be Paid

In the United States, serving as executor does not normally mean volunteering your time for free. State laws commonly provide some form of compensation for the person administering an estate, although the rules for calculating and approving that compensation vary dramatically. Being related to the deceased does not automatically erase that right.

Be Clear About Executor CompensationMikhail Nilov, Pexels

Advertisement

But There Is No National Executor Rate

This is where well-meaning advice from friends can get confusing. One person may tell you executors receive a percentage of the estate, while someone else swears the fee is based on hours worked, and both could be describing the law where they live. Probate is largely governed by state law, so where the estate is being administered matters enormously.

a man sitting at a table talking to a womanVitaly Gariev, Unsplash

Advertisement

Some States Use A Formula

California is an easy example of a state with a statutory formula for ordinary executor services. The percentage gets smaller as the probate estate becomes larger, and the court generally authorizes payment as part of the probate process. That means the executor is not simply inventing a number and writing themselves a check.

A man sitting at a table in front of a statueCarlos Javier Yuste Jiménez, Unsplash

Advertisement

Other States Use Commissions

New York does things a little differently. Executors there can be paid according to a formula set by state law, with the amount generally tied to the size of the estate they handle. The details can get complicated, but the important part is simple: getting paid for this work is not some sneaky move an executor invented. 

focus photography of person counting dollar banknotesAlexander Grey, Unsplash

Advertisement

And Some States Ask What Is Reasonable

Other states leave more room for judgment. In Massachusetts, for example, the law allows an executor to receive reasonable payment for the work they actually do. That means the difficulty of the job can matter, which is why comparing your fee with what a cousin received in another state may tell you very little. 

executorsVitaly Gariev, Pexels

Advertisement

The Will Gets A Say Too

Before discussing money with your siblings, read the will carefully. A will may contain instructions about compensation, and state law determines how those instructions interact with the executor's normal statutory rights. Never assume that the absence of a dollar amount means you automatically get nothing.

The Executor Should Not Pick A Convenient NumberMikhail Nilov, Pexels

Advertisement

Being Named Is Not Quite The Same As Serving

Your parents may have named you executor in their will, but that does not necessarily mean you can immediately start moving money and selling property. In a probate case, the court generally has to officially put you in charge first. California, for example, uses a court process to appoint the person who will handle the estate. 

The Executor Cannot Rewrite The WillRDNE Stock project, Pexels

Advertisement

You Are Doing More Than Signing Papers

An executor may need to locate property, protect assets, arrange appraisals, notify creditors, deal with claims, pay legitimate bills, handle taxes, keep records, and eventually distribute the remaining estate. Even relatively peaceful families can generate a surprising amount of administrative work. Calling all of that “just helping out” seriously understates the responsibility involved.

Consider a Formal Repayment AgreementRomain Dancre, Unsplash

Advertisement

The House Can Become A Project By Itself

Suppose the estate includes your parents' home. Someone may need to maintain insurance, keep utilities running, secure the property, collect documents, arrange repairs, work with professionals, and possibly oversee a sale. Those jobs can quickly turn an executor role into months of calls, appointments, receipts, and decisions.

Real estate agent reviewing property documents with a clientRDNE Stock project, Pexels

Advertisement

And You Are Responsible For Other People's Money

There is another reason executors can get paid: they are being trusted with somebody else's money and property. An executor has a legal duty to protect the estate, keep its money separate from their own, pay legitimate bills, and eventually get the remaining assets to the right people. That is considerably more responsibility than simply doing Mom and Dad one last favor. 

Stressed Woman sitting with covered face with handsKmpzzz, Shutterstock

Advertisement

Your Siblings Still Have A Legitimate Concern

Executor compensation usually comes out of estate assets. That means a fee can reduce what ultimately remains for beneficiaries, including the executor's siblings. They are allowed to care about the amount, even though caring about it does not automatically give them the power to declare that your labor must be free.

Shutterstock-2743211903, Couple reviewing paperwork and checking numbers together on a kitchen counter, focusing on household budget, financial planning, and saving money while having coffeeMiljan Zivkovic, Shutterstock

Advertisement

The Best Defense Is Transparency

Surprising everyone with a fee at the end is a great way to make a lawful payment look suspicious. Early in the process, explain that state law allows executor compensation and that you plan to follow the applicable rules rather than choose an arbitrary amount. Clear communication will not prevent every dispute, but secrecy practically invites one.

Shutterstock-715017412, young couple counting money while sitting on floor in new apartmentLightField Studios, Shutterstock

Advertisement

Keep Track Of What You Actually Do

If you are doing the work, keep a record of it. Write down major tasks, appointments, property problems, calls with professionals, and anything unusual that eats up your time. If a sibling later questions your fee, a simple record of what you actually did is much more convincing than trying to remember six months of headaches afterward.

Caucasian man counting money and writing notes while sitting indoors on a couchhttps://kaboompics.com/, Pexels

Advertisement

Save Those Receipts Too

Executor compensation should not be confused with reimbursement for legitimate estate expenses that you personally advanced. Court filing charges, appraisal costs, publication expenses, and other administration costs may qualify for reimbursement depending on local rules. Keep receipts and separate those expenses from whatever compensation you ultimately request.

Shutterstock-2484613461, young man sitting on sofa at home, holding letter, receipt and worriedly looking at mobile phone, checking bill.TetianaKtv, Shutterstock

Advertisement

Do Not Treat The Estate Like An ATM

Even if you are clearly entitled to compensation, do not assume you can transfer estate money to yourself whenever you feel you have earned it. Procedures differ by state, and some jurisdictions require court authorization before compensation is paid. California's court rules, for example, prohibit personal representatives from paying themselves statutory or extraordinary compensation before an authorizing court order.

Women in Green coat on ATM machine withdrawing cashWeb Stock Gallery, Shutterstock

Advertisement

Courts Can Question Excessive Fees

Being allowed to take a fee does not mean an executor can name any price they want. Courts can step in when compensation appears excessive, and Florida law, for example, allows a court to review an executor's compensation and potentially order excessive amounts returned. So your siblings can question a fee, but simply objecting to it does not automatically make the fee improper. 

Figure Out Who The Executor WasAugust de Richelieu, Pexels

Advertisement

Difficult Estates Can Mean More Work

Some estates go far beyond the usual paperwork. Litigation, complicated tax matters, operating a deceased person's business, or other unusual problems can create substantial additional work, and some states expressly allow additional compensation for extraordinary services. Whether extra compensation is available and how it must be approved depends on the jurisdiction.

Shutterstock-2341127117, Real Estate Agent explain insurance and agreement contract to client before sign contract purchase houseWorawee Meepian, Shutterstock

Advertisement

A Big Estate Is Not Always A Hard Estate

This is one reason executor fees can cause resentment. An estate containing one valuable house and a straightforward bank account may be worth more than an estate filled with modest but difficult assets, unpaid bills, family disputes, and tax complications. Depending on state law, the legal compensation formula may not perfectly mirror the amount of effort involved.

Shutterstock-2257093595, Financial owe, hand of asian woman sitting, holding credit card, stressed  by calculate expense from invoice or bill, no money to pay, mortgage or loan. Debt, bankruptcy or bankrupt.Kmpzzz, Shutterstock

Advertisement

You Can Choose To Take Less

Being entitled to a fee does not necessarily mean you must take every dollar available. Some state laws expressly permit a personal representative to renounce all or part of the compensation, and California courts note that a representative can request less than the normal statutory amount. That gives families room for compromise when the full fee feels excessive relative to a simple estate.

Executorfauxels, Pexels

You Can Also Choose To Take Nothing

Some executors waive compensation because they view the work as something they want to do for the family. That is a personal financial decision rather than proof that every family executor should work for free. If you waive compensation, do it deliberately after understanding what you are giving up rather than because someone guilted you at the kitchen table.

Man in suit thinking in modern office environmentVitaly Gariev, Unsplash

Advertisement

Taxes Can Change The Calculation

There is one catch that can make taking an executor fee less attractive. The IRS generally treats executor fees as taxable income, while money you receive simply because you inherited it is generally not federal taxable income to you. If you are both an executor and an heir, that difference is worth considering before deciding whether to take the fee or waive it.

Portrait Photo of Man using smartphone calculating receipt payment, monthly expensesLek_charoen, Shutterstock

Advertisement

Inheritances And Fees Are Not The Same Thing

If you are both executor and beneficiary, keep those two roles mentally separate. Your inheritance comes from your parents' estate plan, while executor compensation pays you for administering the estate. California probate guidance specifically warns that executor compensation is taxable income and notes that this can influence a beneficiary-executor's decision about whether to take a fee.

Shutterstock-2413198825, Family members giving advice to old man and discussing inheritanceBearFotos, Shutterstock

Advertisement

Do Not Hide A Fee To Keep The Peace

Quietly paying yourself and hoping nobody notices is usually worse than having an uncomfortable conversation upfront. Probate accounting and closing procedures can require disclosure of fees or commissions, and beneficiaries may have opportunities to question what happened to estate assets. A transparent fee that follows the law is much easier to defend than a mysterious transfer discovered months later.

A businessman analyzing financial documents with important data and figures on a desk, ideal for business analytics and accounting themes.RDNE Stock project, Pexels

Advertisement

A Professional Can Be Worth The Money

Being executor does not necessarily mean personally mastering every tax return, legal filing, appraisal, or complicated property issue. Personal representatives commonly work with attorneys, accountants, appraisers, and other specialists where appropriate, although rules governing which expenses the estate may bear vary. Getting qualified help can be particularly valuable when siblings are already threatening to fight over your decisions.

Shutterstock-2010700301, Serious concentrated employer with paper resume interviewing job candidate for hiring. Professional, lawyer, expert, advisor holding document, giving consultation to client. Business meeting conceptfizkes, Shutterstock

Advertisement

Talk About The Fee Before The Final Check

A sensible family conversation can sound surprisingly boring. Explain what the estate requires, what your state's compensation rule says, what you have actually been doing, and whether you intend to request the full permitted fee or something smaller. Turning the argument from “How could you charge us?” into “Here is how the law handles this job” can lower the temperature considerably.

Shutterstock-2181988211, We shall complain to your superiors. Angry worried annoyed young family couple customers clients dissatisfied with bad unfair contract conditions, arguing with agent consultant lawyer prove their casefizkes, Shutterstock

Advertisement

Fair Does Not Always Mean Free

Your siblings may sincerely believe everyone should sacrifice equally after a parent's death, but the executor is not doing the same job as everyone else. If one child spends months handling the estate while the others simply receive distributions, reasonable compensation is not automatically greedy or disloyal. The system allows executor compensation precisely because administering an estate can involve substantial work and responsibility.

women and man talking outside the buildingAlexis Brown, Unsplash

Advertisement

Follow The Rules And Drop The Guilt

So should executors get paid? In many U.S. estates, the law says they can, and the amount is determined by state law, the will, the work involved, and sometimes the probate court. Check the rules where the estate is being administered, document your work and expenses, disclose what you are requesting, consider the tax consequences, and then decide whether taking all, part, or none of the available compensation feels right for your situation.

Man in glasses reviewing documents at deskVitaly Gariev, Unsplash

Advertisement

You May Also Like:

My mother named me executor, and now my siblings think I’m hiding money because the estate is taking months. How transparent do I need to be?

My brother is executor of our parents’ estate, but when I ask what he's doing he says I’m “on a need-to-know basis.” What can I do?

Sources:  12345678910


READ MORE

Internal - Paying Cash For House

My dad says I should always pay cash for houses. But my financial advisor says I need to get a credit card to apply for a mortgage. Who's right?

My dad says to always pay cash for a house, but my advisor says I need a credit card to get a mortgage. Here’s who’s right, how credit really works, and what future homebuyers should do.
April 1, 2026 Jack Hawkins
Rss Thumb - Family Dispute Inheritance

My sister says she deserves more inheritance because she visited our parents more, but I paid their bills. How do families measure fairness?

My sister says she deserves more inheritance because she visited our parents more, while I paid their bills. Learn how families can evaluate caregiving, financial contributions, estate documents, reimbursements, and fairness without turning an inheritance dispute into a permanent family feud.
September 1, 2026 Jack Hawkins
AI-generated image of a couple that retired at different times.

My spouse and I retired at different times, and planning became way more difficult than expected. Is it always so complicated?

Many couples spend years planning for retirement, imagining the day they'll finally leave work behind together. Then reality arrives, and one spouse retires while the other keeps working for several more years.
July 1, 2026 Quinn Mercer
Internal - Power Bill Hack

Our power company was hacked and they delayed billing by 3 months to fix it. Now, my bill is over $1,000. Are they just guessing how much I owe?

Power bill delayed after a utility hack? Learn whether your electric company is estimating what you owe, how to read a catch-up bill, and what to do if a surprise $1,000 charge lands in your mailbox.
April 1, 2026 Jack Hawkins
Millionaire's Row Historic District, Williamsport, PA, April 2011

Detroit's Millionaire's Row shined like a diamond until it crumbled when the Great Depression decimated auto production.

There lies a Detroit neighborhood where wealthy families once strolled tree-lined streets past sophisticated Victorian homes. Today, you’ll only find scattered buildings that hint at a lost world of prosperity.
September 1, 2026 Alex Summers
Woman worried gold recession

My cousin says buying gold is the only way to protect your money right now. The economy has me worried, does he have a point?

When markets feel shaky, gold suddenly starts sounding like the answer to everything. It has a long history, it feels tangible, and it tends to get attention whenever inflation, recessions, or geopolitical stress are in the news. That’s probably why your friend is so confident about it right now. But “the only way” to protect your money is a much bigger claim than the evidence supports.
April 1, 2026 Miles Brucker


Disclaimer

The information on MoneyMade.com is intended to support financial literacy and should not be considered tax or legal advice. It is not meant to serve as a forecast, research report, or investment recommendation, nor should it be taken as an offer or solicitation to buy or sell any securities or adopt any particular investment strategy. All financial, tax, and legal decisions should be made with the help of a qualified professional. We do not guarantee the accuracy, timeliness, or outcomes associated with the use of this content.





Dear reader,


It’s true what they say: money makes the world go round. In order to succeed in this life, you need to have a good grasp of key financial concepts. That’s where Moneymade comes in. Our mission is to provide you with the best financial advice and information to help you navigate this ever-changing world. Sometimes, generating wealth just requires common sense. Don’t max out your credit card if you can’t afford the interest payments. Don’t overspend on Christmas shopping. When ordering gifts on Amazon, make sure you factor in taxes and shipping costs. If you need a new car, consider a model that’s easy to repair instead of an expensive BMW or Mercedes. Sometimes you dream vacation to Hawaii or the Bahamas just isn’t in the budget, but there may be more affordable all-inclusive hotels if you know where to look.


Looking for a new home? Make sure you get a mortgage rate that works for you. That means understanding the difference between fixed and variable interest rates. Whether you’re looking to learn how to make money, save money, or invest your money, our well-researched and insightful content will set you on the path to financial success. Passionate about mortgage rates, real estate, investing, saving, or anything money-related? Looking to learn how to generate wealth? Improve your life today with Moneymade. If you have any feedback for the MoneyMade team, please reach out to [email protected]. Thanks for your help!


Warmest regards,

The Moneymade team