I’m the only woman in an office full of men who constantly make “jokes” about my appearance. I thought we were beyond this in 2025. What should I do?

I’m the only woman in an office full of men who constantly make “jokes” about my appearance. I thought we were beyond this in 2025. What should I do?


September 11, 2025 | Jesse Singer

I’m the only woman in an office full of men who constantly make “jokes” about my appearance. I thought we were beyond this in 2025. What should I do?


It’s Not Just “Office Banter”

You walk into work, and before you’ve even logged in, someone comments on your outfit. Another chimes in with a “joke” about your body. Everyone laughs, except you. It’s 2025—shouldn’t we be past this? Spoiler: we’re not. 

But here’s the truth—you don’t have to just grin and bear it. There are ways to push back, protect yourself, and decide what’s right for you.

Step One: Call It What It Really Is

A coworker commenting on your body isn’t “banter.” It’s harassment. In fact, an EasyJet manager lost his job after making “flirty jokes” about women’s bodies—proving that these so-called jokes really can cost people careers.

175740730701afa8db76f34bd65e1c8b5498a192b6b780f3bd.jpegYan Krukau, Pexels

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Trust Your Gut—It’s Right on Target

Ever sit through a meeting where a comment about you lands, everyone laughs, but your stomach twists? That instinct is almost always right-on. You’re not “too sensitive.” If it feels wrong, it is wrong—period.

175740752220b4c1389583784b02838ad1f1017cd8e7f9957f.jpgCampaign Creators, Unsplash

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Keep the Receipts

That gut feeling gets even stronger when you have proof. Write down what was said, when, and who was around. In real-world cases like PwC’s “boys club” scandal, consistent records turned whispers into undeniable evidence.

1757407597394747c9d02bc3c5ba89cf899e4b59597a04f860.jpgHannah Olinger, Unsplash

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Push Back in Real Time (If You’re Up For It)

If someone jokes, “That skirt’s distracting,” a simple, “That’s not appropriate” is enough. You don’t need a speech. When you feel safe, short pushback shows you’re not a passive punchline. And if you’re not up for it? That’s okay too…

1757407954059d7f7ba9e02763a07ae5d24e297a13bcc12e22.jpegHào Nguyễn, Pexels

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Or, Let Silence Work for You

Sometimes words aren’t worth it. A blank stare, eye-roll, or walking away mid-comment can sting harder than any comeback. Non-verbal pushback sends the same message: you’re not playing along, and you’re not impressed.

17574080531ce43046ca757f1159195fa490447cce9a282fa8.jpegSound On, Pexels

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When the Group Piles On

Of course, it gets trickier when it’s a pack laughing together. Often one guy sets the tone—the ringleader. Undercut him, and the whole chorus usually fizzles. Take away his spotlight, and the “fun” drains fast.

17574081356ca369862d6bfcb4cfde6b3bbace82860c0a5d53.jpgAzwedo L.LC, Unsplash

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If the Boss Is Part of the Problem

It’s worse when management joins in. Ubisoft execs faced trial for fostering cultures of  "jokes"—it’s serious. If your boss is part of the act, skip direct confrontations. This is where documentation and escalation become essential.

175740825782aadf701a21871d0535966c58b250fe8f7b2b4f.jpegAnna Shvets, Pexels

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Find Someone in Your Corner

And here’s why allies matter: even one coworker quietly saying, “Yeah, I’ve noticed that too,” can shift the dynamic. Corroboration strengthens your case and reminds you you’re not alone in this.

175741787213935199c5b3e73033605c6e7c1df582a11be50b.jpegAlex Green, Pexels

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Learn the Company’s Rulebook

Before going to HR, flip through the handbook. Companies love to brag about “zero tolerance” policies—on paper. Quoting their own rules back to them holds them accountable and makes your complaint harder to brush off.

1757408559125d5f4a103f962e475b40e79953b3d7aa3298f6.jpegcottonbro studio, Pexels

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Bring the Facts, Not Just Feelings

When you’re ready to speak up, facts land harder than frustration. “On Tuesday at 10:15, John said X during a meeting with three witnesses.” Specifics keep the focus on behavior, not personalities, and demand attention.

1757408722d222fa930fd059c60bfe6e1452d6f36548513dff.jpgLinkedIn Sales Solutions, Unsplash

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Know What HR Really Does

Here’s the thing: HR isn’t your therapist. Their job is to protect the company. But that means they also hate liability. The clearer your records, the riskier it is for them to ignore you.

1757408900a0c015b1cbdb35048cc9c907c0c19720aaff2119.jpgResume Genius, Unsplash

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If Nothing Changes Inside

And if they still don’t act? That’s when external help comes in. Agencies like the EEOC exist for exactly this. Even Moët Hennessy faced lawsuits when internal systems failed women. You don’t have to fight alone.

175740903120624ef0c0e156cc37e174421cd59a6c40ac1f53.jpegKetut Subiyanto, Pexels

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Take Care of Your Headspace

Of course, dealing with this takes a toll. One bad comment can linger in your head all day. Talking to a friend, journaling, or venting to a therapist helps you unload the weight so it doesn’t bury you.

175740926028a062d1293199acac902c25849da84be670ab3b.jpegTimur Weber, Pexels

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Ask the Big Question: Do I Even Want to Stay?

At some point, it’s fair to ask: is this office worth my time? If leadership protects harassers instead of employees, maybe the strongest move isn’t “fixing” it—it’s finding a workplace that deserves you.

175740943238b16f52116b05c0da3ca9e754deb172128f0231.jpegMikhail Nilov, Pexels

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Build Your Safety Net Outside Work

And that’s where networking comes in. The more connections you make outside, the less trapped you feel inside. A recruiter message or industry meetup can remind you—you’ve got options, and options mean freedom.

17574095302d0a4f52565bd9a4f08c619a53b1521ecc8e6f54.jpegAndrea Piacquadio, Pexels

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Talk It Out Before Making a Move

Big moves hit differently when you’ve processed them with someone outside the bubble. A mentor or friend can cut through the fog of stress and help you see things clearly before you decide.

17574096100e5b3ed1f623dacf3314dfc4c6d7a0c2a388ffa7.jpgChristina @ wocintechchat.com, Unsplash

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When It’s Time, Call a Lawyer

And if the company still stonewalls—or worse, retaliates—it’s time for legal backup. Many employment lawyers offer free consults. Just one conversation can give you clarity and help you plot your next step with confidence.

17574097058daca65c9403cec929f200b39d18994cfafa9a81.jpgadvogadoaguilar, Pixabay

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Be Gentle With Yourself

Here’s the part we don’t say enough: this is draining. Some days you’ll feel fierce, others you’ll cry in your car. Both are normal. Being human in the face of harassment doesn’t make you weak—it makes you real.

17574180800a0699317006266cf29deeb025a925e6a4a33cbc.jpegIvan Samkov, Pexels

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Remember: You’re Not the Only One

From airlines to gaming giants, women across industries are still pushing back in 2025. Sharing stories isn’t just venting—it’s solidarity. And solidarity chips away at cultures that have thrived on silence for too long.

175741002530118c3887e76ea7f376f62095cb16c825ada77d.jpegcottonbro studio, Pexels

Closing: Respect Isn’t Optional

At the end of the day, your body and clothes aren’t up for commentary—they never were. Whether you confront, escalate, or walk away, one truth stands: you deserve a workplace built on respect. Always.

175741018686ca92678fb52f5984eff6bcb59f4210a4d80707.jpegcottonbro studio, Pexels

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