My 82-year-old mom is financially secure, but my sister is trying to persuade her to take a reverse mortgage so she can inherit more money. Now what?

My 82-year-old mom is financially secure, but my sister is trying to persuade her to take a reverse mortgage so she can inherit more money. Now what?


September 24, 2025 | Marlon Wright

My 82-year-old mom is financially secure, but my sister is trying to persuade her to take a reverse mortgage so she can inherit more money. Now what?


A Reader Writes In:

My sister is trying to talk our mother into taking out a reverse mortgage because she’s afraid she'll get less cash from a future inheritance if Mom spends too much of her savings in her remaining years. Her idea is for Mom to live off the equity in her house instead. I think this is a terrible idea. Our mom is 82 with $400K in savings and 401(k), plus a house assessed at $300K. Does it make any sense for her to take out a reverse mortgage? What am I missing here?

Sisterrevmortgagemsn

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Understand Reverse Mortgages

A reverse mortgage allows homeowners 62 and over to borrow against their home equity. Unlike regular loans, payments aren’t required until the homeowner moves, sells, or passes away. This may sound appealing, but it comes with major risks, fees, and implications for heirs.

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Mom’s Current Financial Situation

With $400K in retirement savings and a $300K home, your mom is more financially secure than most people. She has liquid assets and a property that can act as a fallback. She is absolutely nowhere near being in a position where tapping into home equity is necessary for survival or day-to-day expenses.

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When Reverse Mortgages Help

Reverse mortgages make the most sense when seniors are lacking in income or liquid assets. They offer some cash flow for medical bills, caregiving, or basic expenses. In those cases they make sense, as they can help seniors stay in their homes without the added financial strain. But that doesn’t sound like your mom’s situation.

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Why It May Not Make Sense

Your mom already has significant savings, so a reverse mortgage would more than likely be doing her a disservice. It would add fees, interest, and obligations while reducing the value of her estate. She doesn’t need the money for her immediate living expenses, so it’s hard to see what practical benefit she would get out of it.

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Family Dynamics Matter

It’s important to shine the spotlight on why the suggestion is coming up. If your sister’s motivation is inheritance, that’s a big financial red flag. Your mom’s financial decisions should be focused on her well-being, not on worrying about how much money others may inherit down the road.

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Risks Of Reverse Mortgages

A reverse mortgage can power through equity quickly. Interest accrues, fees are charged upfront, and the balance balloons up instead of shrinking. The final result is that when the house is eventually sold, a lot less money will be left over for heirs than anticipated.

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The Obligations Are Still There

Even with a reverse mortgage, your mom still has to keep up with her property taxes, insurance, and maintenance. Failure to do so can lead to foreclosure. At age 82, that’s a completely unnecessary complication when she already has the financial resources to meet her expenses without borrowing against her house.

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Alternatives To Think About

Instead of a taking a reverse mortgage, your mom could gradually draw down from her retirement accounts. She may also consider downsizing into a smaller home if she wants more cash flow. These strategies are far tidier and less expensive than a reverse mortgage.

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Don’t Forget About Long-Term Care Planning

Another important question is if her savings will cover long-term care if she ends up needing it. Planning ahead for potential assisted living or in-home care is a far bigger financial priority than tying up her house in a reverse mortgage loan arrangement.

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Downsizing May Be The Way To Go

Selling the house outright may give your mother more financial flexibility if cash is needed later. She could move into a smaller property and free up equity while avoiding the cost and complexity of reverse mortgage terms. Downsizing can be a very practical, inheritance-neutral option.

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Review Her Retirement Drawdown

Your mom can structure withdrawals from her $400K savings and 401(k) in a way that maintains a comfortable lifestyle for years to come. Working with a financial advisor can ensure she uses these funds wisely without compromising her financial stability or independence.

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Fee And Cost Considerations

Regardless of what your sister might have in mind, reverse mortgages aren’t free money. They come with origination fees, servicing fees, insurance premiums, and closing costs. These charges add up quickly and erode the home’s value. For someone financially secure, the cost-benefit equation simply doesn’t make sense.

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Emotional Manipulation: The Personal Factor

Seniors are often vulnerable to financial pressure from family members. Your mom should be making decisions based on her own interests and not guilt or promises about inheritance. Protecting her independence and security should always outweigh other people’s financial interests.

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Why Your Mom Doesn’t Need It

The bottom line is that your mom already has nearly three-quarters of a million dollars in combined assets. She has no need to unlock home equity to survive. Using her savings first keeps everything simple and guarantees that her house remains debt-free.

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Involve A Neutral Advisor

To avoid family conflict, consider using the services of a fee-only financial planner. This professional can size up your mom’s finances from a neutral perspective and explain why a reverse mortgage isn’t necessary in her case. Neutral advice helps prevent one sibling’s influence from gaining undue influence.

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Discuss Estate Planning

Instead of debating the merits of a reverse mortgage, focus on estate planning. Your mom may want to set up a will or trust that outlines her wishes clearly. This offers security and prevents future disputes among siblings about money and inheritance.

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Prepare For Medical Needs

If your mom one day needs long-term care, her $400K savings and 401(k) can cover much of it. Medicaid planning is another area to take a look at if care costs escalate. Those are more immediate priorities for her financial plan than tapping into home equity now.

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Keep The Control In Mom’s Hands

Ultimately, your mom should retain control over her finances. A reverse mortgage can take away options, saddling her estate with debt. Preserving her choices ensures she can live with dignity and decide how best to use her money and home.

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Final Thoughts

Considering her financial position, a reverse mortgage makes no sense. It appears to benefit your sister’s goals more than your mom’s. Focus on "meat and potatoes" practical strategies that prioritize your mom’s comfort, independence, and health rather than convoluted inheritance planning that will create more problems than it solves. Your mom’s financial stability and peace of mind should come first.

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